Your kids and drugs...

Weed is fine. No one has ever died from overdose on mar1juana, or anything like that. Cigarettes and Alcohol are perfectly legal, yet kill hundreds of thousands more people. Still, don't ever touch cocaine, heroin, or ecstasy. Those drugs mess up your life just as much as an alcoholic.

 

firecat, I wouldn't recommend talking directly with the parents. How about asking your son to ask those kids if their parents know that those kids are bragging about using drugs on their MySpace pages? I think that would get them talking with your son and make them be aware that YOU know they're doing it. Have your son mention "Dude, my dad saw that... I think he possibly might tell YOUR parents" to the other kids. That's just my recommendation. I am hoping someone could offer more on the subject.

If you had kids, you'd have a totally different outlook on this situation, I think, and that's why the OP asked for "Your kids" view (from someone with kids rather than from someone without).

By the way, I am not saying not to offer advice. On the contrary, even if the OP said "Please give advice only if you have kids", we'd welcome your point of view. This just illustrates how those of us facing the reality of raising our kids will think much more differently than those without them. It's OK, dude. Bring your words.

Once you know how your kids behave I think you and your wife, or whoever is helping you raise them, will see it in a different light.

We'll see you sooner or later change your mind about this entire "experimenting thing is OK" deal.

Scarface281, weed is NOT fine.

 

I think it is.

It's a lot safer than cigarettes and alcohol. Cancer patients smoke weed all the time. I actually know someone who had testicular cancer and instead of getting hooked onto the different types of pills (you take a pill for headaches, but then you get diarrhea, so you take a pill for diarrhea, but then get nausea, etc.), he smoked mar1juana. He was on chemo, so all in that one joint, he would lose his headache, nausea, etc., and be super hungry. That hunger is great for chemo patients. He wouldn't have that appetite without mar1juana.

And check out some of these articles:

Studies showing THC - the active ingredient in mar1juana, having cancer fighting properties:

(Journal of Clinical Investigation) Cannabinoid action induces autophagy-mediated cell death through stimulation of ER stress in human glioma cells

(Molecular Neurobiology) Cannabinoids inhibit the growth of different types of tumor cells

(British Journal of Cancer) Cannabinoids inhibit tumour growth

Easier to read articles:

(Science Daily) mar1juana Cuts Lung Cancer Tumor Growth In Half, Study Shows

(WebMD) mar1juana Chemical May Fight Brain Cancer

THC directly relieves neuropathic pain. That means that not only can it help with Cancer and AIDS patients, but it can help amputees, people with diabetes, Multiple sclerosis, back problems, spine surgery, ANYTHING that causes neuropathic pain.

There is a reason why cities/states are passing business taxes on it. The day it becomes legal, invest heavily in Frito-Lay.

 

What does "enjoy life" mean? Kids have to be taught and advised on all sorts of things, including those things that they may not "enjoy".

 

Do you really think it's O.K. for your hypothetical kids to put their future and their academics on the line as well as close potential doors by experimenting with drugs?

Regardless of what anyone thinks about how safe drugs may be, it is currently against the law to have and use them in most cases. I find it hard to believe that some posters aren't seeing the big picture.

 

Another part of the big picture for me, though, is to refrain from stigmatizing drugs to the point that my kids stop talking to me about them, choosing to get their information from other sources. Using your tactics, my kids would see that I wasn't being completely honest if I tried to lump mar1juana in with cocaine and heroin.

Honesty is the key. Kids can tell when you are being honest and they have a good sense of it when you are lying. I would rather my kids know that they will always get 100% accurate information from me.

 

I'm going to go out on a limb and assume you've never experimented.

 

I agree with this.. good observation.. honesty and love trumps anything you couuld do in attempts to prevent "experimentation"

 

Have you thought that maybe you are being ignorant to the big picture, rather than I am not seeing the big picture?

If your kids want to do something, they will find a way to do it. You grounding them isn't going to stop them from going to "study groups" or whatever they can convince you of letting them attend.

In the end, it is damn near impossible for you to stop your kids from doing whatever the hell they want. They only way to prevent this and guide them in the right direction is to provide them honest reasoning and love, and lead by example. Show them how much more virtuous and "enjoyable" a life w/o drugs is. After this, you can only pray they will go in the right direction. If your child gets mad at you, ask them why? Communication is the best prevention.

My ultimate point is that you can't force your kids to do anything just the same as you can't prevent your kids from doing anything. You can only provide your insight, love, and wisdom in hopes that they will learn from what you offer. In addition, you must be proactive in adapting to how your kids react and learn.

 

Don't get me wrong, Dwang, I will discourage my kids from experimenting until they are out of college. I wish I had done exactly that as I was able to experiment intelligently when I started using psychoactives again at age 23. Kids using drugs can add up to massive problems. Adults using drugs carries risks, but they are manageable and at least adults can be made to take personal responsibility for their choices.

 

What "tactics" am I using? Where did I lump anything together? I have always discouraged my kids from doing anything illegal.

 

Thanks for the advice, but my kids are 32 and 27.

 

I'm sorry for any disrespectful comments I may have implied to you. Didn't mean any offense, and thanks for a good conversation.

 

But are you still gonna tell the rest of us with younger-than-32-and-27-year-old kids that letting them "experiment is ok"?

I still don't see your point, sir. See, you brought up ALCOHOL, but this is NOT what this thread is about. Sure, you can bring that in. I have no problem with that. But, for you to say that weed "t's a lot safer than cigarettes and alcohol" is like picking your poison. We're all saying that kids shouldn't experiment or even just do ANY of those poisons.

Of course, our kids will rebel. Of course, kids will be kids. Of course, they will run to their friends and fall into peer pressure. Our fight is against ANY of the peer pressures and to show our kids that they can be happy WITHOUT trying any of those poisons. You must see this point I am trying to make, sir.

 

Have you ever experimented with weed, cigarettes, or alcohol?

 

The kids that brag about doing drugs are the idiots. In my time during high school, I found that the kids who brag about it the most, are the ones that barely, if ever, do it.

 

Can't let this one go.

However, saying that, I am actually in *favor* of legalizing mar1juana, because I do know and understand that cannabis is roughly on a par with alcohol, and probably less dangerous than cigarettes. So I am not some kind of prohibition nut.

But again, however, I don't want my kids 'experimenting' with alcohol or cigarettes EITHER. Despite their 'legality' (and no, just because they are "legal" does not mean that 'kids' can use them any more legally than mar1juana), they are still harmful, period, and that is the bottom line.

To say that pot must be ok because it is arguably less harmful than two already-established-as-harmful things is an extremely weak argument.

And full disclosure here: I have not ever, in my entire life, smoked a cigarette, drunk alcohol, or used any illegal drug. I have not even consumed a cup of coffee (just never developed a taste for it, never had the desire).

None of those things are necessary to have a 'good time', to 'enjoy life', or to be a socially-acceptable person. I have never been ridiculed or ostracized because I refuse to 'partake'.

And in all honesty, whenever I am around people who have been drinking, getting 'buzzed' or 'drunk' or 'just having a good time', I find the people to just be pathetic and obnoxious.

And people who smoke, to me, are just plain stupid. Addictive cancer-causing poison FTW! Yay!

And while pot may not be medically harmful, no one is going to confuse a group of pot-smoking teens for a responsible, ambitious, intelligent and well-adjusted group. It makes them perfectly happy to sit around and do nothing, ever, but eat and lie. And then argue about how it isn't harmful.

Now I am happy to see that some of you have 'experimented' and survived, but that is not evidence that drugs are harmless, but is rather simply evidence that you have thus far been among the lucky ones.

But back to my original point - I do think that mar1juana should be legalized, regulated and taxed, just like other vile things like tobacco and alcohol. Doesn't make them right, or 'ok', but it simply accepts the reality that there will always be a certain segment of the population that is both stupid enough and self-destructive enough that they are bloody-well going to use those things no matter what.

But it will NEVER be 'ok' for children to be among them.

 

Well, of course cigarettes and alcohol are dangerous, but those two things are legal. Since mar1juana is illegal, people think it's on the same scale as cocaine (as evident in this thread).

And that is good! Be glad you have never did any of those things. You definitely don't need them to have a good time.

People are are drunk really are obnoxious. When I don't drink (or drink very little), and my friends get super drunk, it gets very annoying. However, if had smoked mar1juana, everyone is chill and quiet, minding their own business. No one is loud and we get into deep conversations.

My friend's mom has ALWAYS said she enjoyed "high daddy" more than "drunk daddy". Drunk daddy was abusive and wreaked havoc when he came home. High daddy was as nice as you can be.

Smoking is stupid, but some people get hooked. Just like some people don't stop eating food and become obese. As for me, anytime I drink, I always have to have a cigarette. I'm not addicted to smoking cigarettes by any means. A pack can last me two weeks (depending on how many people ask me for one).

This isn't true. Not even in the slightest. I know LOADS of people who smoke mar1juana, but never fail anything. Smart people smoke mar1juana you know. The people you are talking about are the few that can't control it.

But, how can someone who has never experimented with any of it, tell people who have things like this? It's all in self-control. People like to say mar1juana is a gateway drug, too. It isn't.

mar1juana should be legal. Cigarettes shouldn't. We saw what happened in America during prohibition with alcohol. That got us people like Al Capone. You want to do that again? There is no way cigarettes and alcohol are made illegal, but mar1juana's chance of becoming legal (or at least decriminalized) is growing every day. The government will make in the tens of billions in tax revenue and many new jobs would be created.

Nice of you to try and condemn people who use it though. What harm is it doing to you?