I say hit it and quit it no good will come of it. . but HIT IT AND QUIT IT AND FORGET IT Rocket River
FWIW, I did read the whole thing... You are not in a committed relationship with either one of them, so you have no obligation to be faithful to either one. Furthermore, since you were never in a committed relationship with Cali, you owe her no loyalty when it comes to her friends. Don't turn down the bird in the hand because of a bird that is three thousand plus miles away.
Don't know anyone here but I can tell you that I bet the girl in cali is doing someone else on the side, the situation in New York with you seems messed up because both girls know each other but the good news is your gonna tap her friend who you like (just don't screw her over than your done with the cali girl period). Trust me, new girl won't say anything to old girl but if another one of their friends see's something than you are done, done, done my friend.
BTW this sounds like more of a problem of long distance relationship. The friendship thing is really just a red herring. I was in a similar situation once with my ex gf (girl in NY and who I didn't like that much) and this girl in Cali that was my first real love. I eventually ditched the girl in Cali because I wanted sex and she couldn't give it to me, but the one in New York could. If you're gonna go with the girl in NY, be honest with yourself about why you're doing it. At the time I rationalized that the girl in Cali wasn't paying attention, blah blah blah, but in reality I wanted sex and the girl in NY was more convenient.
I think most men would date their ex's friends if given the chance to do so. The problem I see is getting the ex to date you as there is that unwritten rule amongst females, if he was or is mine don't touch.
I dated one of my ex's friends a couple of years after we broke up. It really messed up their friendship I wouldn't recommend it unless you have extremely strong feelings for the girl.
Wow....I actually read that entire thing. I think I'm bored. As for the chicks, go for the new one. If the older one ever makes up her decision, it might be too late. (or you could be just hoping from gal to gal).
I'm in almost the same boat as you my friend this is going to sound ridiculous but here it is I have been talking to a girl from Indiana for almost 7 months over the phone we both think this is crazy and ****, but something keeps us on the phone me and her are very similar, both old school, looking in the same direction, been through almost the same stuff...its insane how similar we are, it bothers us both keep in mind we never seen each other live! we will meet first time in Bosnia this summer, we both are taking vacation almost in the same time, we will be for 4 days in the same city...i hope everything plays out well, she sounds promising if it works out in Bosnia, she is willing to come over my place from Indiana for few days... we'll see..
ugh hope it works out for you. when I was in this situation as you are now, the woman I met turned out to be 1) married 2) a mother and 3) a stalker
lol thats...crazy! and you did not know **** at first? hahah, she did a good job of hiding it I guess
makes perfect sense. Im the same way, I wont get with an ex of someone I consider a close friend. It is just some weird sense of propriety I picked up somewhere. Primo Example (almost 20 years ago now)... girl been seperated from old friend of mine for almost two years, but never formally divorced....girl comes over, acts interested...Im already inebriated, so things start....halfway to home base, I stop things....try to explain that my conscience wont let me pursue it any further. I have a strange kind of moral code that has kept me from having sex with probably twice the amount of girls that I have, if I wasnt feeling a connection, or I thought there was a real chance to catch something, I wouldnt do it.
I heard the kid in the background all the time but she told me it was cuz she worked as a nanny. the stalker thing didn't come out till we got into an argument and she burned my pictures in a garbage can in her garage.
man...I TRIED! but no dice. The action was there to be had in one of my past careers (discussed with jeff re:strip clubs)....but I never took advantage of it. famous rock bands + backstage passes + beautiful women with loose morals and little clothing do equal the opportunity for the local crew guys to scam some tail, that is a fact. I just couldnt get my conscience to shut the hell up when presented with the opportunity.
