I've noticed in the North, women expect you to hold the door. I was leaving church once, and there was a women walking in, I'm already sort of out the door but I just manage to grab it, I'm in this really awkward, strectched out position holding the door and this ungrateful b**** doesn't say a damn word. However, in the South, I always get a "thank you sir, have a good one" for holding the door.
Dude, WTF? As you brother, I feel very confident and comfortable in saying that isn't how you were raised, makes no sense whatsoever, and smacks of sexism. My wife typically wears a pant suit to work. Does that mean she's somehow unworthy of having a door held for her by you?
I do the opening doors/giving up my seat thing. Sometimes I get thanked, sometimes I don't. It irritates me off to no end when I don't get a 'thank you' or a comparable acknowledgment, but the 'thank yous' occur far more frequently. Most days I wonder if women are aware of the mixed messages they send to men, and no, I'm not referring to flirting, dating, and things of that sort. I'm generalizing here, of course, but an unfortunate consequence of women's lib was femininity becoming a negative. As a result, we have a generation of girls who don't know how to act around a bunch of very confused boys who don't know how to act, either.
It's not selfish at all to expect someone to say thank you for holding the door. It's not like Ima went out and attacked the people that didn't say thank you he just said it annoys him. It annoys the hell out of me when I hold the door for someone and they just walk by without saying thank you. How hard is it to say Thank You?
Don't have this problem here in New England Most men, women, old people, etc all say thank you when you hold the door open for them. Even the ones that do stay silent will hold the door open for people behind them. Then again I guess we're just more educated that the rest of the country.
I agree with ima. I almost always hold the door open for women, and if I see it's a guy, I'll give the door an extra push as I walk through so that he can catch it. All of the times I've been ignored has basically turned me into what I am....someone that will say "you're welcome" if they don't say thank you. The worst part is that I won't say it under my breath, I'll make sure they can hear me. The sad thing is that most of the time, they still don't acknowlege me. As some others have said, this also applies while I drive. If I let someone in and they don't say thank you, it really gets on my nerves. Pugs
I generally haven't had a problem with this, as most women (and men for that matter) say thank you, or at least acknowledge the fact that I'm doing something courteous for them. It is annoying though when somebody DOESN'T acknowledge it. I've actually lowered my window once while in traffic, and asked the girl trying to get into my lane if she would thank me once I let her in. She said yes, so I waved her through. Needless to say, she made it a point to thank me.....5 years later, she is now my wife. Ok, so that last part was a lie, but the rest of it was true. It would've made for a hell of a story if I DID marry her though, wouldn't it??
The double doors are tricky. There are two ways to hold the door. The "hold the door for a person but still enter the building first" and the "hold the door for the person but wait until they enter and follow them in." It gets tricky and awkward with the double doors. They either hold 2 doors for you (if they enter the building first), and I'll say thank you after each door, or I end up holding the second door open for them (if I enter the building first), which is awkward. I ALWAYS say thanks or thank you.
I only open the door for good-looking women because then they always want to have sex with me. It is mean to open the door for a woman, have her think I am dreamy and want the sex, only for me to tell her she is ugly and I have better taste. So I let the doors close for the uggos.
I was at the hardware store this afternoon and had experience that reminded me of this thread. I was in the checkout, and this lady in front of my was chasing her 5-ish-year-old brat around. Ironically, the kid had a t-shirt on that said 'Respect'. I made a joking comment about how his shirt said 'Respect' on it, but the lady didn't appreciate it and kind of glowered at me. The cashier had a good chuckle though. That was pretty rude on her part. So I check out, and when I go to my car, lo and behold, the lady was right next to me. She was struggling to put her kid in his car seat and he was fighting her. I was in a pretty good mood so I decided to try to be friendly again and said 'Kids! Can't live with 'em, can't decapitate 'em and mutilate their bodies!' Then the real rudeness of this chick came out! She gave me some kind of wide-eyed evil eye, slammed the door, jumped in and sped off! Not only was it super rude and inconsiderate, it was unsafe too, because I know that kid wasn't buckled in. I swear.
I've learned over the years that you have to do the right thing for your own satisfaction and not anyone else's.
I always hold the door open for people immediately behind me and they almost always say "thank you". You must be working in some crappy environment. Maybe it's the Houston humidity pissing all those women off. "ANOTHER BAD HAIR DAY!" :grin:
