thanks, communication. noted. it's hard to talk to her when the conversations become so emotional, she tends to get angry when i really tell her what's going on in my head. the baby keeping her up at nights, and us both working also takes a toll. at least i know i'm not the only one. +1 repped.
didn't he leave her? wasn't she a complete utter biaatch? yeah, that's too many. no ****ing way. one or two and i'm done. cut cut.
uh, her answer meant yes Been married for 3 years, have a two month old now. The key is to not sweat the small stuff. I try to let the little things roll off my back and I don't argue about little stuff. There are times that I disagree but I would prefer a happy home over fighting over something dumb...it was one thing when we were dating because I could just leave and go home and we would make up the next day, but nothing is worse than a pissy spouse in your own home. Obviously if it's something I feel is a big deal, I'm willing to argue about it and put my foot down. Doing little things helps as well...like coming home with flowers randomly or going with her to do something awful (like buying makeup) every few weeks or just looking her in the eyes randomly, telling her how much you love her and then give her a good kiss. Communication is huge as well. Don't let stuff build up and then erupt and fight about it. Talk things out if they bother you, and encourage her to do the same. There isn't any solution or formula that works 100%, marriage is work as well...and I guess I also got lucky and met someone who I don't fight with often. But it isn't always easy and no couple NEVER fights...
Noted. She's hot. Great personality. I'm not married yet, hopefully soon. However I've dated some hot chicks with great personalities, except it never works out in the end because we're just not compatible. Just saying. Hopefully you two are more compatible than I was.
I know one lucky poster on this board then. I've been married for 18 months. There are great times and bad times. We have two kids, which adds a lot of stress. When we are having lots of sex, things are much happier. When we aren't, there is more tension both ways.
Man, babies just exacerbate and can cause so many problems in a marriage. The sleepless nights are hell on even the best of marriages. As I'm sure you know, free time doesn't exist or is at least greatly curtailed when you have infants in the house. Make time to spend with your wife. Even if it's just a quiet meal or watching a movie. You start to lose yourself when you spend so much time taking care of a little one, and it helps to remember that you are also in a quality relationship. If you're fighting about the same stuff all the time, schedule some dialoguing when you make some free time together. It helps to discuss big issues when you're not in the heat of an argument. Be willing to compromise and keep an open mind. It's not about winning an argument but about finding constructive, positive ways to approach your differences. As Blake said, don't sweat the small stuff. If she's doing most of the late night work with your child, she's going to be hurting and a lot more irritable than you most of the time. Let her get in the last shot in an argument. It's not about winning every one of those. If you feel you take abuse a lot, discuss this calmly at a later time. Good marriages are a lot of work, but if you put in the effort, it's well worth it.
As boring as it sounds, ScribeErgoSum is right...communication is where everything is held together. You'll go through rough times and yes, there will be those evenings where you're not terribly interested in hanging out together. But if you have a breakdown in the communication where you can no longer tell her how/what you're thinking/feeling, FIX IT IMMEDIATELY or the relationship's days are numbered. That, and compromise...a LOT. And make sure that she's compromising, too. It's not overtly about exchange, but covertly is definitely is. Let her know which things you can't compromise, and encourage her to do the same. The rest, come to terms with what she needs/wants and explain where you're at. If you won't compromise on anything, marriage won't work for you. I'm not suggesting that you won't, I'm just saying in general. I've only been married for about five years, so take what I say with a grain of salt...but there has never even been a brief moment where either of us have seriously considered anything but a lifetime together. Everybody's got fleeting thoughts, but we're extremely happy.
Hell yes broseph! Next time I see you at the game I gotta buy you a beer you handsome son of a b****.
Been with my wife for 12 years. We have 2 daughters. I love Mrs. SwoLy. No Tiger. Ever. Looks like you won't be arguing about this one anymore since you stopped smoking. Obviously, she didn't like it and you did. Then she told you about it, you said "No!" and she said "Oh, yes." And then you stopped smoking. I bet you argue less (at least about smoking) because you stopped smoking. She asked you to do one thing and you obliged. Why did you oblige? because you love her. Why? Because she's yo baby momma. Why? There are so many reasons. Among one of those is "because Chamillionaire ClutchFan wants to be happy not arguing with his wife and make his wife happy." Less arguing. More happy Mrs. Cham. Do you want to make this woman happy? Do you want to see your baby see you making this woman happy? Do you want your woman and baby to see you and her happy together. Man, think about that. It's not a MAN's world. It's a WOMAN's world. We're just here to make them happy. THAT will make US MEN happy. Remember the "Chamillionaire Clutchfan, please don't smoke" pleads from her? Whether she was whining, whispering, nagging, or shouting it at you, it made a difference when you stopped smoking. If this makes her happy and then you're happy, ALL OF US CLUTCHFANS are happy. Less arguing. BE WELL, Chamillionaire. Be Well.
