The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
"Do you prefer baths or showers? Actually it doesn't even matter cause I'll join you regardless" If that doesn't get her panties to drop I don't know what will... :grin:
So I hear you have a pretty big vagina. You're not Jewish, are you? How much money would you pay me to sex you up? Hey b****, pay attention to me. Any of those will have the women crawling all over you.
Forgot to add that it is very imperative that you snap your fingers in her face constantly while you use any of those lines.
