I was gonna kill myself this August. Not anymore. I had never been outside of Texas my whole life until this summer. The plan was to go on a nice vacation some place and then shoot myself. The last year has been really rough for me. I lost my religion so my family and old friends stopped talking to me, didn't make any new friends just met polite friendly people, work got me real stressed, being stuck hours in traffic, crime every day in my neighborhood etc. I didn't want to do this for another half century. I found out i got some money from a relative's will, but it turned out I got a lot more than my uncle said the Will had. Hired a lawyer and got the full amount. They said really hurtful things which made me go ahead with the plan. I was just going to drive to california and back.. but then said fuyck it I'm gonna die soon I'll just go whole hog. Got a passport and for the last month I visited London, Paris, Moscow, St Petersburg, Tokyo, and Kyoto. I think the only way to say how Im feeling right now is when Dorothy comes back to Kansas from Oz. My old life and problems feels a lot smaller and fixable now. Everything that I was taught has been a lie. It's like the Matrix movie only the real world is a lot, lot more beautiful than people I trusted said it was. Getting on an airplane for the 1st time and when it took off and seeing the clouds outside and Houston below was mindblowing. The way foreign people talk, how they dress, the foods they eat, the price they pay for gas, what they think of Texas, their old buildings, their gorgeous women... Throw away your TV it's just propaganda. Wear clothes that fit and look good on you. Eat and drink well and excercise. Cut out toxic people from your life. And please travel. If life is bad change the scenery. I know for a fact most people have no idea what is out there and they think this is all there is. If you cant afford a vacation travel with your mind by reading good books. I'm in love with life and I hope this helps someone out there rethink their decision.
Cool story bro. I mean it! Have you tried being a couchsurfing host? That might bring that international flavor back to Houston while you plan the next chapter of your life. It lets you share Houston with eyes that never been. Texas is great at many things, but it's a different kind of place. Try finding a job that travels and do that for a few rounds. Use that newfound optimism to plant the next stage of finding new adventures.
Nice! If you've seen that Golden Gate Bridge documentary you know the majority of suicide is by people who'd regret it immediately. Glad you found that out before too late!
Great post and glad that you are back to enjoying life, hope you'll have a happy future. The point where you talked about losing your religion and family abandoning you because of it heavily reminded me of Landlord Landry. What is wrong with these ultra-religious nuts in the USA, turning on your loved ones because they no longer believe in the teachings of a book with made-up stories? Disgusting and I honestly don't understand what could lead someone to doing this.
I'm glad you got on a plane for the first time ever and traveled out of Texas, and I would prescribe the same for many others who might view the world in a similar way that you once did. Way to stay alive!
The world is small . . . and big at the same time Hope Springs Eternal Glad you got to see it .. . . . and yes. . . almost all our problems are minor Seriously . . .. If you not Terminally ill, Hopeless addicted or paralyzed from the neck down LIFE IS GOOD . . . .. even in those circumstances their is good to be seen and had Rocket River
Travelling the world and seeing how other people live changes your perspective. You realize that there are many different routes to get to the same place and there isn't always the same right answer.
I don't want to derail this thread. This is about Faust and his awesome story. But he never said what religion it was he lost that his family and friends turned away from him for. I'll tell you though, IF it was Christianity, they would never act like that if they TRULY read and believed that "book" you referred to. There's a LOT of fake Christian nut jobs out there who don't practice what they read or preach and give the rest of us a bad name. But again, this is about Faust. Amazing story and awesome advice. I'm happy you found yourself and your reason to, not only live, but live with true happiness and peace. Your story is a real testament and I'm happy you shared so that it could just maybe help someone else who is feeling the same way you did before. God bless!
I thought I had written your post. Very similar. Been a manic depressive and diagnosed Bi-Polar and life was taking its toll. I cut out the drinking and partying and replaced it with exercise and Dogs. I traveled around the U.S. and I can't stop smiling. I still get depressed but never suicidal anymore, because I know it's on me to change things and be happy.
Glad to hear that you're still with us breh! Traveling does indeed have magical powers! I second ATW's sound advice, "stay away from those white supremacists".... ....... ....... .......
