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To Charge your Significant Other or Spouse or Not To

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by peleincubus, Jun 26, 2016.

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  1. peleincubus

    peleincubus Member

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    Ahhh that makes sense. No I'm straight and male. I just meant I showed the responses to the person I had the conversation with. He is a photographer and he said that he would potentially charge a woman that he was in love with that he had been with for 2-3 years, and/or all the way up to being married to them for taking pictures of them.

    I completely disagreed and would not do that myself. I posed the same question on my facebook, he did on his facebook etc.

    He said though after I showed him these responses that most of those people probably do not own their own business. And that would perhaps change what your response to this question would be.
     
  2. rezdawg

    rezdawg Contributing Member

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    I own my own business...and if anything, that makes it even easier to not charge a significant other or spouse. Your cost for services is low compared to the price you charge, therefore, in that sense, it makes even less sense to charge a SO.
     
  3. peleincubus

    peleincubus Member

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    That makes sense also.

    For me it's very simple. If I love someone I am not going to do that. I am going to do whatever I can to support that person. And hopefully would do the same.
     
  4. professorjay

    professorjay Contributing Member

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    Sounds like he's getting defensive. And that he's never actually dated a woman before.
     
  5. JuanValdez

    JuanValdez Contributing Member

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    My wife and I own a business. But, it's a S corp now and we need to keep the accounting clean. So, if we were to use the business for services for either of us that engaged any employees, consumed inventory, involved retail, or any of that other crap, we would charge ourselves (with the standard employee discount) just to avoid the headache it would create in Quickbooks if we took it for free. But, if I was a sole proprietor photographer with pretty much no variable costs involved in my business apart from my own labor, it'd be ridiculous to charge my wife for those services.
     
  6. Caesar

    Caesar Member

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    I'd charge extra.
     
  7. BigDog63

    BigDog63 Member

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    Did you discuss pricing up front? If not...why not? Here's the problem you may now have. They would, quite reasonably if price was never discussed, just assumed this is something you were doing for them, and be upset that you are now bringing up pricing.

    If you didn't, you need to have that discussion. Or decide not to (which may, at this point, be the better option). This isn't a 'what bill do I send her' conversation, this is an expectation resetting conversation. And resetting expectations is generally neither easy nor fun, and that's true for any client, much less one you are in a relationship with.

    So, back again to 'how did you get to this point without discussing price'. Maybe just best as a lesson learned. As a friend of mine's mom constantly told him "well, that was painful, but you learned a good lesson, and you should be glad it didn't cost you more"
     
  8. BigDog63

    BigDog63 Member

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    and you'd be lucking that laughing in your face was her response. I could see spitting/slapping/etc being more common responses.
     
  9. rezdawg

    rezdawg Contributing Member

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    Yes, ultimately, this answer is that should trump everything. However, if we really want to get to the nitty gritty details of the finances, then a business owner has much more control and ability to give services to a significant other than someone who doesnt own a business.
     
  10. malakas

    malakas Member

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    If you are just in a relationship and it's more casual I can understand charging at a big discount.

    But for spouse? lol
     
  11. peleincubus

    peleincubus Member

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    I agree. Although even if someone is not my spouse. I would say someone you love, been with 2-3 years, and live with is close enough to marriage also.
     

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