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Thirty Facts about Ryan Bowen

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by hotballa, Jan 6, 2006.

  1. thadeus

    thadeus Member

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    Ryan Bowen burns 3847 calories for every second he's on the court. If he doesn't eat 37 Turkeys before every game, he will turn into a pile of dust after approximately 15 minutes of play.

    Ryan Bowen played one season in Turkey, but was banned from the country for trying to eat it.
     
  2. SwoLy-D

    SwoLy-D Member

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    Ryan Bowen is a web programmer/developer/designer/encoder/decoder/writer/artist by trade and shoots baskets with the Rockets in his spare time.
     
  3. Sishir Chang

    Sishir Chang Member

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    Once one of Ryan Bowen's teammates cheated on his wife. In retaliation she decided to have sex with the whole team. She made the mistake of starting with Ryan Bowen and after that she said, "After Ryan Bowen no other man will do." Ryan Bowen then slam dunked her through the hoop, gym floor and into the earth for sleeping around on one of his buddies
     
  4. thacabbage

    thacabbage Contributing Member

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    Ryan Bowen has not once gone to basketball practice. And that is why he is so bad.
     
  5. thacabbage

    thacabbage Contributing Member

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    Ryan Bowen touches himself at night.


    (thought I would get that in there before nyquil got a chance.)
     
  6. Billyp

    Billyp Member

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    Ryan Bowen is the father of T-Macs son.
     
  7. JumpMan

    JumpMan Member
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    Every team needs a player like Duncan. That's why we signed Ryan Bowen. We felt although it had gone bad for him in his last year there (in Denver) and you never know someone until you coach him, you're going to try to get that one guy who is a difference-maker.
     
  8. dc rock

    dc rock Member

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    Ryan Bowen's bowel movements are used as currency in some Gabon provinces.
     
  9. thacabbage

    thacabbage Contributing Member

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    nice.
     
  10. JumpMan

    JumpMan Member
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    Thanks. I just made that up. ;)
     
  11. KAS13

    KAS13 Member

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    Ryan Bowen sleeps with the night light on. Not because Ryan Bowen is afraid of the dark but because the dark is afraid of Ryan Bowen.
     
  12. swilkins

    swilkins Member

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    It's been said that Ryan Bowen's unwavoring defensive style picks up microwaves. That's why you can't cash in your Big Mac coupon until after the game.

    When Ryan was recently approached about this:

    Ryan responded, "Because let's face it - A nuked Big Mac? That's just wrong."
     
  13. Ender120

    Ender120 Member

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    Ryan Bowen threw the cup at Ron Artest. Ron rushed the stands, but upon seeing the monster waiting to deliver a beatdown on him, punched an innocent man instead, feigning ignorance. Only the crowd collapsing on Artest saved his life that night.
     
  14. pgabriel

    pgabriel Educated Negro

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    Once Denver was down by thirty with 1:30 to play in the fourth against the Nets, and Bowen hit 10 three pointers in a row and after each one he stole the ball from Kidd to hit the next. then with the game tied, the ref called a foul on his next steal attempt because he just couldn't believe what he was seeing, so Bowen drop kicked him put on his uniform, reversed the call, put back on his denver uni, stole the ball, and won the game.
     
  15. KAS13

    KAS13 Member

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    Ryan Bowen was originally a character on the Street Fighter game. He was removed from the game due to a glitch in which every button you pushed caused him to throw a roundhouse kick. When asked about the glitch Ryan Bowen responded "That was no glitch."
     
  16. Rocketman95

    Rocketman95 Hangout Boy

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    Ryan Bowen caught the real murderer of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman. The roundhouse kick he later threw at Kato Kaelin brought Johnnie Cochran back to life.
     
  17. dc rock

    dc rock Member

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    Ryan Bowen wrote the song "Freebird," and when he wasnt given credt by the band he personally crashed their plane by throwing basketballs at it. He did the same thing with Buddy Holly.

    One day Ryan Bowen challenged and defeated all the members of the Hell's Angels in a game of HORSE, unfortunately it was at Altamont before the Rolling Stones' concert.
     
  18. Billyp

    Billyp Member

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    Ryan Bowen once played an entire NBA game 1v5. The final score of 124 - 12 does not reflect the enormous basketball ability of Bowen as the 12 points scored against him occured when he entered the stands to have impregnate 25 willing carriers of his "super" offspring.
     
  19. swilkins

    swilkins Member

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    When Gene Peterson mentions Ryan Bowen's name during the game, you get better fuel economy.
     
  20. TMac640

    TMac640 Contributing Member

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    how are any of these remotely funny?

    considering there's nothing funny about bowen, he's just ****ing pathetic lol.
     

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