1. The mouth guard is a Tier 7 weapon with attributes of +5 in Mental Concentration, +3 in Armour and with the special active effect of 'Confusing Opponents and Fans alike if taken out consecutively on three or more possessions'. 2. Jeremy Lin doesn't put the ball in the basket. The basket moves towards the ball. Its special relativity.
How would I say these threads make me want to jump off a bridge or spontaneously combust in geek speak?