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[TheOnion] Dwight Howard Interested In Ruining Rockets

Discussion in 'Houston Rockets: Game Action & Roster Moves' started by horns fan, May 23, 2013.

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  1. horns fan

    horns fan Member

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    LOS ANGELES—Ahead of his impending free agency, Lakers center Dwight Howard told reporters Thursday that he is “very interested” in moving to Houston and completely ruining the Rockets. “They have a great young core of players with James Harden and Jeremy Lin, so I’d obviously love the chance to go shatter their chemistry and tear the entire locker room apart,” said Howard, adding that he would “relish the opportunity” to totally undermine Rockets head coach Kevin McHale. “There are a few teams on my radar right now. Dallas has a really solid roster too, and I’m definitely intrigued by the prospect of clashing with Dirk Nowitzki and running that whole franchise into the ground. We’ll just have to wait and see what happens.” Howard did stress to reporters, however, that he has not yet ruled out remaining in Los Angeles to continue destroying the Lakers for the foreseeable future.


    http://www.theonion.com/articles/dw...g&utm_campaign=standard-post:headline:default

    Not trying to start anything, I just love me some Onion and thought I would share.

    PS: I did a find on threads and didn't see anything, but please remove if already posted.
     
    #1 horns fan, May 23, 2013
    6 people like this.
  2. Fair Dinkum

    Fair Dinkum Member

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    OK, so we are analyzing fake satirical news now?
     
    #2 Fair Dinkum, May 23, 2013
    1 person likes this.
  3. jvu

    jvu Member

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    not sure if i lacked a sense of humor reading this or if i lacked a sense of humor reading this.. real funny. sigh
     
    #3 jvu, May 23, 2013
  4. coachbadlee

    coachbadlee Member

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    Not all Howard news is thread worthy.
     
    #4 coachbadlee, May 23, 2013
  5. DreamShook

    DreamShook Member

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    What analysis? who is 'we'?
     
    #5 DreamShook, May 23, 2013
    1 person likes this.
  6. Fair Dinkum

    Fair Dinkum Member

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    Would McHale be the kind of coach that will take **** from a player like Howard? I dont know, but I don't think so.
     
    #6 Fair Dinkum, May 23, 2013
  7. JuanValdez

    JuanValdez Member

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    It's funny cuz it's true!
     
    #7 JuanValdez, May 23, 2013
  8. cheke64

    cheke64 Member

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    Yes man say yes all the time
     
    #8 cheke64, May 23, 2013
  9. RedRedemption

    RedRedemption Member

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    Its a satirical article. Stop trying to analyze it. Just laugh and move on.
     
    #9 RedRedemption, May 23, 2013
  10. dachuda86

    dachuda86 Member

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    I think this is good enough to be thread worthy. Thanks for posting OP.
     
    #10 dachuda86, May 23, 2013
  11. john_l

    john_l Member

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    I was thinking more in terms of irony than satire.

     
    #11 john_l, May 23, 2013
  12. dachuda86

    dachuda86 Member

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    irony is an element of satire
     
    #12 dachuda86, May 23, 2013
  13. coachbadlee

    coachbadlee Member

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    The only thing that he could possibly ruin is our ability to land another star to put with him and Harden.
     
    #13 coachbadlee, May 23, 2013
  14. rocketsmetalspd

    rocketsmetalspd Member

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    Who ever wrote this article sure wants DH to stay in LA.:grin:
     
    #14 rocketsmetalspd, May 23, 2013
  15. J Sizzle

    J Sizzle Member

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    I laughed. Thanks OP
     
    #15 J Sizzle, May 23, 2013
  16. SF3isBack!!

    SF3isBack!! Member

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    it's funny if you have a sense of humor.
     
    #16 SF3isBack!!, May 23, 2013
  17. Bogey

    Bogey Member

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    When did The Onion become a legitamite news source? To much truth in that article for it to be from The Onion.
     
    #17 Bogey, May 23, 2013
  18. DarkHorse

    DarkHorse Member

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    I also laughed. Thanks.
     
    #18 DarkHorse, May 23, 2013
  19. Akim523

    Akim523 Member

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    Dwight....the destroyer!
     
    #19 Akim523, May 23, 2013
  20. ROXTXIA

    ROXTXIA Member

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    It's funny. What's up with the Jesuit priests in this thread? "I find not a shred of humor therein; tryest thou to maketh a joke?"

    It's funny. Now on to the interminable "he will he won't" thread about Dwight.
     
    #20 ROXTXIA, May 23, 2013
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