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The Real 2015 Rockets Trade Value

Discussion in 'NBA Dish' started by jtr, Jan 26, 2015.

  1. jtr

    jtr Contributing Member

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    Simmons, at Grantland recently published the rules for evaluating NBA talent. In Simmons' words, there are some notable NBA trade rules...

    1. Salaries matter. Would you rather pay Serge Ibaka $12.4 million a year or Chris Bosh $20.6 million?
    2. Age matters. Would you rather have Dirk for the next three seasons or Boogie for the next 12?
    3. Contract length matters - a newish wrinkle in an era defined by shorter guarantees, swollen caps and forward-thinking GMs who hoard cap space like it's Walter White's crystal meth recipe.
    4. Pretend the league passed the following rule: For 24 hours, any player can be traded without cap ramifications, but with luxury-tax and next-day-cap ramifications. If Team A tells Team B, "We'll trade you Player X for Player Y," would Team B make the deal?
    5. Concentrate on degrees. For instance, a Klay Thompson-Dwyane Wade swap ain't happening, but Miami would at least say, "Wow, Thompson's available?" while GSW would say, "We can't trade Klay for someone who's eight years older." That counts in the big scheme of things.
    6. This list runs in reverse order. If Thompson is no. 18, then players 1 through 17 are all players about whom GSW's braintrust would either say, "We hate giving up Klay, but let's have a meeting ASAP," or, "Done! Call this deal in!" And GSW wouldn't trade him straight-up for any player listed between nos. 19 and 60.
    Please Please Call Us With Your Offer ... Any Offer

    Joey Dorsey. Nuff said.

    Morey Likes Them - Are You Going to Believe Morey or Your Own Lying Eyes?

    Alexy Shved. Morey actually gave up an asset to obtain him. That says a world about Shved. Don't look at his stats ... please.

    Nick Johnson. He could actually develop into a valuable rotation piece. And he can play defense. With serious size.

    Kostas Papanikolaou. He cannot shoot but every other part of his game is well ... OK. Plus he sports a D-Moesque beard. How is that not a positive? Expensive so please call in offers. Soon.

    Isaiah Canaan. He performs well on the big stage but he is short and if he could be shovel out assists at a high rate and defend point guards he might be a star. As a PG.

    We Have an Old But Valuable Rotation Player Please Bring Offers

    Jason Terry. And he is a great mentor and good in the locker room. And he has a positive +/-! Bring your offer of a sub-29 year old and we will listen. Once off the lot no guarantees though.

    Morey Knows He Has a NBA Starter. Please Start the Bidding High.

    Clint Capela. Though he is probably 2-3 years away he shows Whiteside potential. Is that necessarily a good thing? Probably. Because if you are long and can leap out of the gym you will succeed. But only if you can understand the NBA game.

    He Has Been Out Injured For 11 Weeks But the Fan Base Is Still High On Him.

    Terrance Jones. He has fan support. And you really really do care about the fans opinion don't you? OK maybe not. But he still has some value right? I mean how many athletic tweeners are in the NBA currently? A lot? But none like Jones I assure you.

    He Fits So Well With the Rockets Don't Even Think About Calling. You Will be Hung Up On.

    Corey Brewer. Is he a god send or what? He accepts being a rotation player despite having starter talent. He can hit the three, run the break and defends rather well. OK. Offer us Jamal Crawford. We be there, stat.

    He Is Not Trade-able So Please Don't Call.

    Josh Smith. Nuff said.

    He Is Worth Much More to Us Than to You.

    Patrick Beverly. A bad fit for any team that does not feature LBJ or Harden as the SG. He is looking at a 3 year deal for $3M a year. Pretty much worthless to any other team.

    He Has a Great +/- But He is Mired in an Epic Shooting Slump.

    Trevor Ariza. Man, he might be great on defense but I, as a fan, can only handle so many 3-12 games. And those are not contested shots. Teams are just not closing out on him hard at the three point line anymore. I cannot take much more of this.

    Don't Call. You Cannot Stand the Pain of the Assets You Would Have to Surrender.

    Donatus Motiejunas. Morey's crown gem. Barely utilized on offense so far. All star potential tattooed on his forehead. A player you could build a young team around. A calming force both on the defensive and offensive sides of the ball. Is there a player on the Rockets besides Harden that you would rather see with the ball with the game on the line? And that defense. And the developing three point shot. What is not to like?

    Give Us LMA and We Can Talk.

    Howard. I would do that trade. In a heartbeat. Howard, given the development of D-Mo somehow has become expendable. As if any FO in the NBA would trade a super star who was not demanding to get out. If they did so they might never sign a super star again.

    Once You Mention His Name You Will Be Hung Up On.

    James Harden. Even if you are my mother.

    An Interesting fact that I bet you did not know.

    The average business school graduate from MIT Sloan makes $159,000 three years after graduation. Didn't someone named Morey graduate from there?
     
  2. BigShasta

    BigShasta Contributing Member

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    Welcome back man!
     
  3. J.R.

    J.R. Contributing Member

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    :grin::grin:

    ________________

     
    1 person likes this.
  4. Haymitch

    Haymitch Contributing Member

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  5. Nick_713

    Nick_713 Member

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    Hands down, the funniest line in your entire post! Great post all the way around, but the part about D-Mo gave me the most laughs hands down!
     
  6. jtr

    jtr Contributing Member

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    And thus the trade request. Reversion to the mean is a bitch. And Brewer in all probability will revert to the mean. But honestly I hope not.
     
  7. KlutchQT

    KlutchQT Contributing Member

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    Good thing you were dead wrong, huh? :p

     
  8. KlutchQT

    KlutchQT Contributing Member

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    I see I was beat to the punch lolol.
     
  9. Aleron

    Aleron Contributing Member

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    About Shved, his contract (and its ability to match trading requirements) was more valuable than the asset he gave up to get him (and vice versa for philly).
     
  10. jtr

    jtr Contributing Member

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    I do wish that the Rockets could freeze this Corey Brewer in time and not have him revert to his career averages. That post was a snapshot in time. What can I say?
     

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