So, a recap of quotes from Season 6: 1. Gossip Creed: If I can't scuba then what's this all been about?? What am I working toward? Michael Scott: How long have you known about the pregnancy? A week? A month? A year? Jim Halpert: Michael we only told our parents last week. Michael Scott: Did you pee on a stick? Jim Halpert: I did. It was inconclusive. Kevin: [irate] Who's been saying there's another person inside of me, working me with controls!? 2. The Meeting Michael Scott: It is a colonoscopy. Oscar: Ok. Michael Scott: In your experience, what should I be expecting, in terms of sensation. Or, emotions. [pause] Is there anything I can do to make it more pleasurable for me or for Dr. Shandri. My main concern is should I have a safe word? Oscar: Yeah. Toby: Hey you a**hole! You gonna eat all that dog food yourself!? Michael Scott: If you are lying to me, right now, Pam, your baby is going to come out a liar. That's how it works. They inherit things through the breast milk. Pam Beesly: Please don't talk about my breast milk. 3. The Promotion Creed: Hey why haven't we ever uh... Meredith: We have. Dwight Schrute: People are starting to notice how terrible Jim is. It's great. Eventually they'll rise up and revolt. My only hope is they do it sooner rather than later. If people here were our founding fathers the Revolutionary War would've been delayed ten years. Because Stanley Washington was napping. And Phyllis Hancock was still signing the Declaration. And Kevin Jefferson was distracted by a butterfly. 4. Niagara Dwight Schrute: Pam is constantly throwing up because of the pregnancy. If she eats something the fetus doesn't like, she is screwed. It's amazing: a three ounce fetus, is calling the shots! It's so bad a**. Oscar: What are you doing? Kevin: I'm trying to decide if I have time to pee. Oscar: How long do you take to pee? Kevin: The peeing is fast, Oscar. It's getting my tie back on. Dwight Schrute: This is to play when you bring a woman back to your hotel room. Michael Scott: Oh! Very thoughtful. A little mix to set the mood! Delightful, pop that in! Recording: [Dwight in a low voice] Hello. My name is Dwight Schrute. If you are listening to this you are a lucky woman Michael has seduced. Ahh to be in your shoes. What's next, you're probably wondering. Don't be scared of your night in heaven...! Kevin: What an awesome party. The best wedding I've ever been to. I got six numbers. One more, would've been a complete telephone number. 5. Mafia Michael Scott: I will have the spaghetti. With a side salad. Waitress: Ok. Michael Scott: If the salad is on top, I send it back. Michael Scott: What topics, can you use for small talk? Andy: Golf, stock market, Dave Matthews-- Michael Scott: Yes, what else? Creed: Small things. Peas, ball bearings, dimes. Michael Scott: There is nothing more insulting to a great salesman than having to listen to a bad salesman. It's like a great basketball player having to listen to a bad basketball player. 6. The Lover Toby: Hey Jim! Jim Halpert: Not now Toby! My God! Michael Scott: Get the hell out of here, idiot. Michael Scott: Ok. I have a good thing with the mom. Jim Halpert: Don't call her the mom. Michael Scott: She's right on my way home from work. Jim Halpert: THEN TAKE A DIFFERENT WAY HOME MAN! Michael Scott: Alright! I'll take surface streets... Dwight Schrute: You know, I really would've appreciated a heads up that you were into dating mothers. I would've introduced you to mine. Michael Scott: You know what, I'm gonna start dating her even harder. Pam Beesly: What's that supposed to mean. Michael Scott: You know what it means. 7. Koi Pond Michael Scott: How much do they want? Erin: Three hundred dollars. Michael Scott: What! No. I could get a fish for a five cent worm. Creed: Oh you're paying too much for worms man. Who's your worm guy? Stanley: Michael don't listen to them. Michael Scott: Thank you Stanley. Stanley: You just ignore their carping. 8. Double Date Andy: You give me a gift? Bam! Thank You note. You invite me somewhere? Pow! RSVP. You do me a favor? Wham! Favor returned. Do not test my politeness. Michael Scott: The only time you should care about a woman's age is if she is too young for you. And I am not robbing the cradle. If anything, I am robbing the grave... Meredith: Hey everybody, he's not in the men's room. Although the seat was warm, so we may have just missed him. 9. Murder Kevin: Michael, did you just throw-up in there? Michael Scott: Nah. Just poopin'. You know how I be. Kevin: It smells like throw-up in here. Michael Scott: Crazy world. Lot of smells. Dwight Schrute: Michael, what is the meaning of this email that everyone got? Michael Scott: You'll have to be more specific, Dwight. I get like eight e-mails a day. Jim Halpert: In everyone's defense I think the most worthy opponent of you is... you. Dwight Schrute: That is correct. Unless there happen to be measles present. 10. Stakeholder Meeting Oscar: So typical of management to spend money on this. Ugh, bunch of boobs. Michael Scott: Hate to break it to you Oscar, but some of us like boobs. Dwight Shrute: Calves. [raises hand] Calves all the way. CEO: He's our best manager? Where's the off button on this moron? Michael Scott: Uhh. I'm not a moron. Time after time, my branch, leads in sales. I have personally won over seventeen Dundie awards so I am not a moron. Andy: I've always been the guy who can rally other people to rebel. In high school, I organized a walk out over standardized testing. Got over 500 students to just skip the SATs. At the last second I chickened out, took it anyway got a twelve twenty. Always regretted it... I feel lachrymose. 11. Scott's Tots Michael Scott: Now, I can't pay for your college. But you don't have to go to class, to be in class. Online classes are a viable option to a traditional college experience. [unzips suitcase] And the best way to access those courses is with your own personal laptop. Which is rendered useless, without batteries. And I have one for each of you. [the entire room erupts with outrage] Michael Scott: Hold on! Hold on! Hold on! Hold on. [the room quiets] Michael Scott: They're lithium! Creed: Guys, I'm starting to think Pam's not even pregnant. Dwight Schrute: In an ideal world I would have all ten fingers on my left hand so my right hand could just be a fist for punching. 12. Secret Santa Michael Scott: What would you like for Christmas little boy? Kevin: I don't know. I didn't know you were gonna ask me that. Michael Scott: What did you think was going to happen? Kevin: I don't know. Nobody's ever let me sit on their lap before. Jim Halpert: I'm not going to go tell Phyllis that she can't be Santa. Michael Scott: Fine! Then do it anonymously. Ransom note style. You can.. I .. you know what, I have a bunch of letters cut out of magazines in my desk. You can use those. Jim Halpert: [Jim to Michael after he tried to make Ryan sit on his lap] You can't yell out 'I need this I need this' as you pin down an employee on your lap. 13. Clip Show None found 14. Sabre Oscar: Did we try printer first? Shredder at an angle? Fax, cable, then the scanner upside down? Pam Beesly: Yes. Creed: Have you tried making everything smaller. Michael Scott: There are very few things that would make me not want to team up with David Wallace. And "Suck It" is one of 'em. Michael Scott: Scissor me! 15. Manager and Salesman Michael Scott: I have been saying the word manager a lot. So whenever Jo thinks manager she thinks of me. Camel Cigarettes did the same thing with Joe Camel, by making him look like a penis. I can't even go near a cigarette now, without thinking of a penis, and vice versa. Oscar: Pssh, I should step into sales myself. Michael Scott: Why, is there an untapped gay market? Oscar: Sabre, has no caps on commissions. You can make a lot more money in sales. Michael Scott: Where did you get that information? Oscar: Manual. Michael Scott: Manuel who? Michael Scott: No I'm serious, we don't have to put up with--is it the dogs? You know what, we don't have to deal with this. I am going to Google sulphur maps. Dwight Schrute: Michael it's Phyllis. Michael Scott: ...No this is geological. 16. The Delivery Kevin: Pregnant Pam and I, we get hungry at the same times so we've been eating together a lot. Not all meals. Just, second breakfast, lunch, second lunch, and first dinner. Michael Scott: [packing for the hospital] Will I need a dictionary? Oscar: No, the hospital will provide a dictionary, bring a thesaurus. Michael Scott: Ho! Ho! Hooo! Contraption! She's contrapting...! Ok, you know what? I think that I should drive you guys to the hospital and here is why. I am a licensed, Class C driver in the state of Pennsylvania . I, gassed up the car--actually I put diesel in this time, trying to safe some money-- Jim Halpert: You shouldn't have done that. Michael Scott: Happy to do it! 17. St. Patrick's Day Michael Scott: It is St. Patrick's Day. And here in Scranton, that is a huge deal. It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas. Dwight Shrute: What the hell is this? This is not Megadesk. Jim Halpert: Oh! No, it's not. They call it Quad-desk. Dwight Shrute: That's ridiculous, this is made up of three desks. Jim Halpert: Oh my God. We're gonna have to rename it then aren't we. [Darryl's moving into his new office] Michael Scott: Very nice! Darryl: Not bad, huh? Michael Scott: A real hoop dream story you got there. 18. New Leads Michael Scott: Dwight? Dwight Shrute: Sorry, Michael, I've got calls to make. Michael Scott: I would like your undivided attention please. Dwight Shrute: [squarely] You couldn't handle my undivided attention. Dwight Shrute: [arguing at a dumpsite] Ok when I first met you, I had a lot of job offers. And, I had an offer from Ivan Chatski. The Ivan Chatski. Now if I would have assisted managed him-- Michael Scott: Assisted to the managed him! Dwight Shrute: Michael you were supposed to tell me when the leads came in! Michael Scott: Well Bigshot, if you want to find your leads, go to the man who never breeds. Dwight Shrute: [pauses] Kevin! 19. Happy Hour Kevin: Well when a new mom, hears a baby cry, her you-know-whats fill up with you-know-what? And then her shirt gets... you know. [giggles to himself] That would be funny! Darryl: Tell me your story Heeday. Heeday [in broken English, with subtitles] In Japan, heart surgeon. Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But, mistake! Yakuza boss die. Yakuza very mad. I hide in fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car, and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret: I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best! Dwight Shrute: It's just that we both-- we want different things. You know, I want a big family... Angela: I could see enjoying that. Dwight Shrute: N--n--n--no. I want a big family. Tall. Thick. A big-- physically, a big family. 20. Secretary's Day Erin: And then, my last job was at a Taco Bell Express. But then it became a full-time Taco Bell and... I donno. I couldn't keep up. Michael Scott: What are you doin'? What are you doing. Erin: In the foster home my hair was my room. [starts yelling under her hair] Michael Scott: Ok, ok. You know what? You know what? Everybody's looking at you now. [yelling] I'll have what she's having! Andy: It's Secretary's Day. And, it is Erin and mine's three week anniversary. So, perfect storm! For a romanic gesture. Wanted the whole office to remember it's Secretary's Day. I sent an email blast, a text blast. A good old fashioned talk blast. I sent a snail mail blast a week ago. And, a stern reminder via fax at seven o'clock this morning. So people better step up. And appreciate the crap out of Erin. I do. If it wasn't for secretaries, I wouldn't have a step-mom. 21. Body Language Oscar: [in Michael's office] Your office is full of genitalia. Michael Scott: Eso es lo que dice el! Oscar: That's what he says? Michael Scott: Damnit! Dwight Shrute: I don't understand why Michael is wasting his time with Spanish. I have it on very good authority, that within twenty years everyone will be speaking German. [pause] Or a Chinese-German hybrid. Michael Scott: This is a place that I like to go to be alone with my thoughts. I've never taken anybody there before. Donna: Who took the photo? Michael Scott: Ryan. 22. The Cover Up Creed: So there I am, minding my own business, and Darnell offers me three bucks. All I gotta do is walk by Andy and go like this. [makes throat cutting gesture] Darnell's a chump. I would've done it for anything. I've done a lot more for a lot less. Dwight Shrute: All cases are solved with logic. The only logical way to find out if Donna is a cheater is to seduce her, bring her to orgasm, then call Michael and tell him the sad news. Donna: [laughs] Hey, if I said that we should go away for a couple days, you would... Michael Scott: Poop my pants. Donna: Have you ever been to Vero Beach? Michael Scott: Oh my God, Vero Beach! No. Is that on the water? 23. The Chump Dwight Shrute: I don't have 30 thousand dollars lying around. I have it buried very deeply, and I don't want to dig past a certain someone to get it. Dwight Shrute: Come on, the whole two bullet thing is a red herring. Here's how you do it, you line them all up, you take one bullet shoot them all through the throat at the same time. [stands up] Watch this, Phyllis, you're Hitler, come up here. Toby, you're Toby. Andy, you're Bin Laden. Line up. Throats together. Dwight Shrute: So much of this is just impossible to verify. Item five point B. Uh, the beet juice cleanse. Angela: I'm doing it! You know I am, it's disgusting. Dwight Shrute: How do we know this? I'd like to see a stool sample. Angela: Dwight. Look at my teeth. [shows beet red teeth] Dwight Shrute: Uhgh.
Wow. I guess I'm pretty much alone on this one. I thought it was pretty decent. Not in an "awesome way to tie up the season" kind of way but I just found the episode to be easy and funny. What I liked most about it was that they bounced around and gave everybody a little moment or line. I wish they would do that more often. I like that style much better than Michael-centric plots.
I thought it was enjoyable. I actually liked Kathy Bates' character and thought when she first got there it was actually believable as an intimidating boss. Woof pretty much made the episode for me. Not exactly a season finale type episode, but thank god they didn't make it into another boring Andy/Erin romance snoozefest or other forced romance crap. I think it'd be great if they somehow worked Michael into doing more PR next season. And I'd definitely be okay with Holly coming back and Toby going away again.
Watching a re-run from season 1 through 4 and then watching last night's episode is like night and day. I still enjoy the show and haven't tuned it out, but you can tell they are just running out of ideas. Everything is way too plot driven now instead of just having the great short-term scenarios make the show like they used to. Bates character really doesn't do much for me. Hopefully bringing Holly back will revitalize the show to some degree. I just hope they can go out on a high note.
Careful- a lot of people will tell you that Season 4 was garbage. And 5. And 6. And that Parks and Community are way, way better (totally disagree). We just get tired of shows, eventually, I guess. Tell you what, I've been watching Parks all year, and I watched several episodes a few times, and I think Ron is a great character, and Andy is actually pretty hysterical, but I can't for the life of me figure out the fascination with Anzari's character. His attempts at being cool almost always fall flat- he's just an OK actor, maybe that's what it is- but he's not in the same ballpark as characters like Dwight and Andy (Office Andy).
Saw it live on TV and thought it sucked. Watched it again on hulu and found myself laughing during the episode more than the first viewing. It was a decent ep.
Yea I dont get the whole Harry Potter thing he's got going on. Its pretty obvious BJ Novak is trying way to hard to make his Ryan character funny. He throws out these one-liners that are just out of place that you can tell is coming from BJ the writer and not something the actual Ryan character would say
Exactly. Tom Haverford isn't a player. He's a wanna-be player who fails at being cool. Leslie described him perfectly as "an adorable man-child." So it's funny because he's unironically trying to be a douche but is actually an adorable man-child.
I don't know- I mean, he's definitely funny in some episodes- Ok, got your point, I'll rent P&R 2 this summer and watch em again, I'm sure.
If next season is Carell's last, I'm going to predict that he marries Holly in the final episode. I thought the finale was a dud, but I'd like to see more of the IT guy next season.
The scene with the IT guy was pretty great - reminded me of the beginning when Michael had a choice of firing Creed or Devon. Next season should be their last in my opinion.
By the way, anyone going to watch Daryl (Craig Robinson) tonight at the Houston Improv? Craig Robinson at Houston Improv When Sunday, May 23, 2010 Where 7620 Katy Fwy Houston, TX 77024 (map) Description http://www.symfonee.com/improv/houston/home/Index.aspx
I imagine the writers (Toby, Kelly, BJ) would be able to find work as producers or creating their own stuff. Half of them had their own projects/films.
