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The Man, The Beard, The Legend

Discussion in 'Houston Rockets: Game Action & Roster Moves' started by NBYNW, May 3, 2015.

  1. NBYNW

    NBYNW New Member

    Apr 29, 2015
    Likes Received:
    How does one define the evolution of James Harden? As a Sophomore at Arizona State he was an enigma. Here are some of the less complimentary quotes from nbadraft:

    The Beard, as it Grows Harden Become More Dominant

    While Harden was drafted third in the 2009 class, his NBA future was certainly never assured. When Harden came into the NBA his evolution as a player was slow, but inexorable. Just look at his year by year improvement:

    <a href="http://imgur.com/MYYBVB0"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/MYYBVB0.png" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    While correlation is not causation, what exactly changed with James Harden? I would propose, much like the Biblical Sampson, Harden's beard has somehow fueled his prodigal improvement in basketball skills and complete court dominance. Let us just examine The Beard. At Arizona State his beard was just basically a metrosexual's well trimmed facial adornment. Do you feel threatened by this beard?

    <a href="http://imgur.com/HG4A8Cg"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/HG4A8Cg.png" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    Precision cut, neat, somehow restrained. In Harden's early years with the Thunder the beard filled out, but here were still bare spots, smiling behind the deep black wiry facial hair. In Houston that facial hair has filled out , obliterating any hint of human skin beneath its concealment. Thus we find Harden's foundation of basketball wherewithal, as fueled by the Beard, the smooth precise surgical disembowelment of defenders, the knife in the back last second game winning shots, the assassin of the NBA every bit as deadly as GOT's Jaqen H'ghar. Just view and bow down to the evolution of Harden's Beard!

    <a href="http://imgur.com/ZMUSNuT"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/ZMUSNuT.gif" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    And so what is the next evolutionary step in store for us as Harden's beard continues to develop? I would propose this as the model for Harden's beard development. At this point Harden will be a cross between himself and Wilt Chamberlain, quite able to pick small coins from the top of the backboard and dunk from half court.

    <a href="http://imgur.com/ZLtA0dS"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/ZLtA0dS.png" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    And so, I have to ask, how good would this man have been if he actually could grow a man's beard?

    <a href="http://imgur.com/BxjR5Vc"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/BxjR5Vc.png" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    A completely different version of this take appeared on TNR a few weeks ago.

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