And be sure to order her food. "the lady will have the linguini and white clam sauce, and a Coke with no ice"
My advice is to try to date (or hang out with, whatever you want to call it) other women, but don't lose contact with her. Maybe even casually mention that you have gone out with others to see how she reacts. What I wouldn't do is keep talking to her about getting together...that'll probably just drive her away. Be friends with her, but don't be all sappy and act like you NEED her. Hopefully, after a while, and after you've gone out with some others she may be more open to the possibility of being with you. That's the best I can do...you may be already too far in that "friend zone".
Let a little part of yourself die each and every day and these things won't hurt so bad. Wait, you wanted *good* advice...erm, I think she is trying to let you down easy and really does want to be friends. Being friends is not the end of the world if you actually enjoy her company. Sometimes guys "like" girls directly in proportion to the possibility they have of getting some action. Call this the Hugh Hefner principle.
So I spoke to her today, we had our last lecture for the year together. We decided to take some time out from each other, and see what happens from there. Whatever happens, it'll be an interesting Summer this year. Once again, thanks for the advice guys. It's sure been a weird couple of days. I'm already getting over it, and feeling much better than this morning.
from a girl's perspective and i've been in this situation on several occasions, i'm telling you, the girl is being honest with you. she values and enjoys your friendship and doesn't wanna risk ruining a good thing. she probably confides in you for many things and like she's said, she's thought about dating you as well. those are natural feelings when you know a person real well (when harry met sally). she's not bsing you or leading you on. she is being completely honest with you. but you also have to realize that only you can let her lead you on since she's been honest with you already. so i agree with others, try to meet other people or keep busy (like you said ya'll are gonna take some time off) in the meantime and see if she comes around. sometimes (like in tv) it does take years for a friendship to mature to a love relationship. good luck!! how many married people here started out as friends and debated about risking the friendship? i'm willing to guess quite a few since girls value trust in a rltnship and that takes some time to build. -ruby
Not me, I knew the night I met my wife that I would marry her. Two and a half months later we were married. Yesterday was our 8 year anniversary. I think the friends thing is bull****. If you are good friends what is it going to hurt in trying in a relationship. Friendship should be the basis of any relationship. Women think way too much.
I think the friends thing is bull****. If you are good friends what is it going to hurt in trying in a relationship. Friendship should be the basis of any relationship. Women think way too much. yes, i agree girls do tend to think too much (but i have met guys that think too much as well) but sometimes when the attraction just isn't there, you can't force it. just enjoy being friends and don't hang onto the fact that ya'll could date sometime in the future. if it happens, it happens.
I disagree with the girls think too much part, most guys just dont think enough. But I agree 100% with the rest!!!!
TroyMcClure? I don't think you should be giving advice on this one... The pot calling the kettle black? JK...
We certainly started out as friends. We were very close friends for a year before we started dating. Also, quite a number of our happily married friends started off in a friendship. In a few cases the woman was not at all interested in dating and eventually fell in love. I would suggest you not spend so much time talking about your feelings. I also suggest you ignore the advice of trying to liquor her up and get her in bed, that is probably exactly the sort of relationship deterioration she doesn't want. Of course, I'm assuming that when you say you're crazy about her you mean you actually want a relationship. If you just want sex, making a move may or may not work. Good luck
But my pot currently has two people in it... so I must be doing something right... or possibly whistling pass the graveyard for now...
She is leading him on. What does 'values and enjoys your friendship', 'don't want to risk' and the other stuff essentially mean? She doesn't want to date him. Simple. And that's what she should leave it as. The other stuff is bs because all it does is make her feel better about telling him that and - here's the important part - gives him some hope that things will 'change'. "So you're saying there's a chance..." Some girls do think too much about this. And we guys are way too simple for it. The so-called 'reasons' like that don't help the guy one bit.
