I take that back.........coat hangers are like 20 for 1.99 at dollar store just make as to go though thru the cervix...... partial abortions are no fun...
Yeah, maybe not so funny, Hicklander. But you came as close to uniting the various factions of poo-flingers as you possibly could have. so congrats on that.
I broke up with her. No I didnt see the results, plus we are going to a doctor soon so that should clear things up. I doubt she made the tests up especially since we're going to a doctor.
More important than talking to people on a bbs, go talk to her and figure out what the hell she's thinking about all this. it's silly to discuss things like abortion (which is serious ****, I'm kind of shocked by how non-chalant people are about something that serious, doesn't really matter where you stand on the abortion debate) It doesn't matter what happened or what lies messed up your relationship, there's a kid involved now so go find her, talk to her, and figure out what she's thinking about in relation to this situation. Then go find a doctor who specializes in pregnancy and discuss your options. If you feel you wrapped up everytime, then maybe you aren't the dad so go talk to her about that. Be a man about this and be responsible and mature. It doesn't matter to me what route you take, but go sit down and talk to her. And the hanger joke - not funny at all.
Heck with this broad She knew you were coming to do some dancing, she should have kept her floor clean and safe
i dont care how scared you are...dont get an abortion...i went through the same experience a few years ago and i know the feelings of uncertainity and anxiety as you wait for her next period or pregnancy test...but dont get an abortion...your partner will feel that loss for the rest of her life...the thoughts of "what if" and "if only" will haunt her and you for a long long time and the guilt will surface as the years go by and you cant make it go away...you cant look a toddler without thinking of the baby you aborted...have the child if indeed she is pregnant and make sacrifices for the child...try to stay together for the kid...do whatever it takes so you dont have to live with the regret later on...
Is abortion even legal? If so in which States? Also, what about the morning after pill? Is emergency contraception an option for you?
What in the hell is wrong with you? It's a human life in there. How can you put a dollar amount on that? Wouldn't that have been cool if your father would have thought the same thing?
Take it for what it's worth, but I wrote it at the end of one of the worst days I've had in a long time, and after I tried to make the day better with a whole bottle of Burgandy. Reading it again this morning...........I'm not sure I could be that hard in practice. Though it is obvious I can think it up. What a crappy situation though. The "lies" comment and the comment about being sure he had it wrapped up every time linger with me. Completely sober, and with a night to "sleep on it" so that a cooler head will prevail...........I'm pretty sure I'd still be insisting on some type of paternity test.
is it better to not have been born or to have two parents who don't love each other in the first place and likely have one parent use you against the other? the guy already doesn't want the baby. and if my father thought the same thing, why would i care? i wouldn't have any feelings if i wasn't born.
Have you at least been willing to ask her if she had been with other people since you had broken up? She may still lie about it, but if she is honest and she has been with others, then the full picture might come into focus a little more.
1.) Pretty darn accurate. They detect hCG in the urine... something that's not usually there. 2.) "Free." My mom went to a Planned Parenthood clinic when she was in college and thought she was pregnant, and they gave her a free pregnancy test. They said she was pregnant, and they could "take care of it" for her. She got her period a week later. Oops. Go to an OB/GYN for a clinical pregnancy test. 3.) From Wikipedia: 4.) The price for an abortion goes far and beyond the dollars they charge at the center. I'm not going to go into a morality rant here (though I AM a Catholic boy, so you can see where I stand), but there are physical consequences she needs to be aware of (increased risk of cancer, infertility, etc. I recommend doing the research yourself). They don't tell you about those when they kill the baby. And, speaking from personal experience, just because she thinks its all fine and good now doesn't mean so in the future. Someone close to me had an abortion a couple of years ago, and she's carried so much guilt and anxiety ever since that it's nearly ruined her life. So don't just go about it willy-nilly. Aiight? EDIT: You know, you can always put the kid up for adoption. Or one of you can raise the kid yourself. Should you decide to do any of these, check out this list of crisis pregnancy centers in Houston.
Jesus, some of the responses in this thread make me cringe. Most of my 14K posts are stupid one-liners, but man... not in a thread like this... Anyway, I would make sure that kid is yours before I did anything else, if there really IS a kid. Like B-Bob says, the whole "built on lies" thing would be reason enough to do that before anything else. One of my best friends is in this exact situation. She's about 2 months pregnant. It's no fun, but he's doing the right thing, which is being there for her (even though they don't get along at all) and his kid. They are both trying to be adults about all of this and trying to make the best of it for the kid. Who knows what the future holds, but at least they are trying to do the right thing. But yeah, find out if that kid is yours or not. Good luck. BTW, stories like this make me not miss dating AT ALL...
armyman, I would follow what Raven Lunatic said. Ask her if she had been with any other guys sexually since you broke up with her. She might lie to you but on the other hand she may be completely honest. If you feel that you had a condom on every time you had sex, I would demand a paternity test. If the paternity test comes back that you are the father, then the abortion issue is a very sticky one. There's a part of me that feels that if you and her are not capable of being good parents, then maybe an abortion wouldn't be a bad thing. However, you can still allow the child to be adopted which I think is what should be done. Or you can just nut up and try to be a responsible parent. The main thing though is ask her if she has been with any other guys sexually, demand a paternity test, and let her decide if she wants to keep the baby. If she does decide to keep it and you are the father then you need to do the morally decent thing to do which is to support her and your child. I wouldn't advocate marriage since you can't really trust her, but you just can't turn your back on your child, if you know what I mean. And for the future - if you know that you don't ever want to have kids, look into getting a vasectomy. I got one shortly after I got married and it was one of the best things I have ever done (my wife disagrees but she doesn't think in practical terms sometimes). If you get that done, you never have to worry about unexpected surprises. Good luck.
Once you have a history of supporting it for a while it is yours. So if a couple years down the road you find out it isn't, you are still on the hook. Find out early on if you are unsure. Good luck.
Oh and I'll add this... Last night I thought about how much your life changes when you get married and then have kids compared to being single. I came up with a formula: 2 raised to the n power where n represents the number of people other than yourself living with you. So, if it is just you, then it is 2 to the zero power or 1, meaning life is pretty simple. If it is you and your wife, then it is 2 to the first or 2 and that means your life got twice as complicated than what it was before. If it is you, your wife, and a child, then it is 2 to the second or 4, which now means your life is 4 times as complicated than what it was when you were single. 2 kids? Then it is 2 to the 3rd or 8 or 8 times complicated than what it was when you were single. You get the idea - someone else has probably already come up with something like that but I think it is a good analogy of how your life can change. armyman - your life, if you are going to be a daddy, is going to be at least twice as complicated (probably more if you are going to be a single parent) than what it was before. You have to be ready to be responsible and embrace the changes your life will have. Take it from someone who had a hard time embracing the changes - if you struggle with that, it can and will destroy you.
You can get an AMEN to that one. And how. Every time I miss it, I will come back and read this thread.
