Roller coasters. In high school my girlfriend and I went to a local fair. There was a roller coaster she wanted to ride. Now, we were both virgins at the time so she thought it would be a good idea to lose our virginity to each other on the coaster. We get on the coaster. In the back car so no one can see us. She pulls down her shorts and she's not wearing panties. I almost lose it right then. She reaches down my pants. And that's when she found my stash. See, from the time I was about 11, I would masturbate into a sandwich bag. When no one was home, I'd pop that bag into a pot of boiling water. I used to imagine I could hear millions of little sperm screaming. Sperm holocaust. It was exhilarating to kill millions of things with one simple act. After a good 20 minutes in the pan, I'd let it cool and then stick it in my food dehydrator. It'd form a crust. I'd scrape it off and store it in another bag. This other bag became my stash. I always dreamed that the first time I ****ed a girl, she'd pull out this stash I had been saving for years and snort it like cocaine. I formed this elaborate fantasy where she'd snort my boiled dry c*m powder and I'd tongue her *******. Well, so there I am on this coaster with my girlfriend holding my c*m bag and she ****ing drops it. Between the tracks. Never to be found. Punch her in the face. She screams, starts crying. Blood running down her face. I don't care. Punch her in the head. Again and again. Again! Over and over! A bloody mess. She's dead. Keep punching. Her head is now hamburger. Hamburger Helper. Ultimate Cheeseburger Macaroni.
