Gonna share an incident that happened today at a Home Depot parking lot to get people's take on where they'd assign the most blame. One of those situations you tend to replay in your mind ad nauseum, after the fact, just to see if there was anything different you could have done. So I pull into the parking lot with the wife and kids in tow. The kids were asleep and we decide how many bags of mulch I should pick up while she stays in the car with them. As I'm about to leave, I hear a thud and feel the car shake a little. The guy parked next to me had slammed his car door into mine as he got in to leave. I exchange a look with my wife to confirm what just happened. Not thinking so much as reacting, I open my door forcefully and hit his. Well that just sets this guy off. He gets out of his car, f-bombs everywhere. Threatens to "stomp" me, yadda yadda yadda. I get out, tell him my kids are sleeping to get him to stop shouting or at the least cut the curse words out. More f-bombs follow. We tell him he hit my door first, to which he replies that was an accident. I don't think I've hit anyone's door that hard on accident, personally, but this was his claim in the current situation. As he keeps getting more riled up, even pushing my hands away, I tell him he should just get in his truck and leave. We go at this a little more and eventually he gets in his truck and drives away. I make a note of his plate with the intention to report him to the Harris County Sheriff's non-emergency line. My wife and I felt with his threatening comments and general actions, he should be reported to the police. I give them a call but was told I'd have to wait there for a constables car to file an official police report. My wife and I decided it wasn't worth all that so end up not filling the report. With all that said, I suppose I didn't have to forcibly hit/dent his door. I could have tapped his window to discuss the issue. But a part of me feels if I had done that, he'd have driven off without a second thought to hitting mine in the first place. What do you think?
Well... w/ all the crazies out there and your wife and kids w/ you it might not be worth it... Then again he was an *******, so I'm on your side I mean if it was an an accident why the **** didn't he apologize????? Also, I think you handled it better than me, haha, after he started swearing I'd have asked him "where's my ****ing apology for hitting my car??" my kids are older now though, so... Probably better not to re-escalate
I'm on your side as well. But yeah. You probably shouldn't react like that next time, especially when your wife and kids are there too. Not worth something escalating and the potential negative consequences over a door dent.
That's bad on you bro. I don't know nor could I imagine ANYBODY who purposely opens their doors into others, I think there's a 99% chance he did it on accident, albeit a careless and rude one, but still a accident. What you did, was deliberate, and that is flat out wrong. You should have just got out, or rolled your window down and talked to him about it, get his info and have him pay for the damage. What you did was asking for a fight, I understand the adrenaline and anger you must have felt in the heat of the moment, but bad decision bro you should have handled that more maturely, especially with your kids/wife in the car.
It doesn't ****ing matter if it's an accident. Accidents can be avoided if you're ******* careful. If he can't help himself getting into accidents, he shouldn't leave the house. You did right hitting his door. I personally would've dared him to hit me and proceeded to make his face a part of the road.
Agree with others that sure, the guy was a huge douche, but you are lucky it didn't quickly turn into a 'when keeping it real goes wrong' moment.
I'm getting real tired of hearing this excuse. This is basically saying it's ok to back off every confrontation on the possibility that the situation could get improbably escalated. Stand your ground man. Most situations can be measurably controlled so that you can stand your ground without it turning into a big mess. Don't let bullies prance around unchecked.
This reeks of insecurity and immaturity , nobody is saying he should have just pretended that his door didn't get hit and done nothing. Standing your ground doesn't mean reacting out of anger or puffing your chest out, the post comparing it to Chappelle's skit of "when keeping it real goes wrong" is spot on. Standing your ground, like an adult with children and a wife in the car, is getting out of the car, talking to the man, getting his info and making him pay for it.
whats with all the crazies at home depot. Had some crazy b**** follow me once because I honked at her in the parking lot for being an idiot.
id have rubbed my greasy thang all over his windshield and dropped his ass I front of my kids as lesson to drop a mother ****er even if it's an accident
You did right. He knew he was FOS. I would have done the same ****ing thing and layed a smackdown on his candy ass. I would've turned it into a cage match.
The post I was quoting sure sounded like it. But I disagree about the idea that he was in the wrong for hitting the guy's door back. The other guy already hit him, inadvertently or not. Somebody punches you, you have the right to punch back. So he can do that AND get the other guy's info.
So more than likely the guy did accidentally hit your car. Now it was probably carelessness, but why on earth would he have purposely hit your car? Also, with your family in the car why would you have taken the stance you did and purposely hit his car as well? That makes you no better than him, especially considering his may have been accidental, while yours was definitely on purpose. You put your entire family at risk.
At one point I had something very similar happen where if it wasn't intentional, it was at the very least a nearly criminal disregard for anybody else on the face of the planet. It is easy for others to say, from a distance, that you should have kept your cool, but I know I almost lost my **** when it happened to me. I yelled at the guy, and when he gave me a blank, "I don't give a ****" stare and walked away without so much as a mumbled "sorry", I slammed my car door into his three or four times before driving off. I'm not proud, and was pretty ashamed almost right away, with a little distance I chalk it up to just reacting like a human being. Ideally, you would be a saint among men and turn the other cheek, but I think 99% of the world would have lost their cool in the heat of the moment too. Maybe the best thing thing to take from the situation is to try and learn from it going forward so that you're a little more composed if it happens again, though if in the heat of the moment you loose your temper the next time it happens I wouldn't really blame you. In my situation, what really set me off was the fact that I was clearly upset at his actions, and he just didn't give a rats @ss. If he'd apologized right off the bat it would have probably defused my anger. I'm guessing, based on this guy's reaction, that if you'd jumped out of your car and confronted him, you probably would have received similar disinterest. I drove for work 7 days a week, 12 hours a day for more than five years. I never once "accidentally" slammed my car door into another car. If that is something that you do, and you don't feel embarrassed by it or feel the need to apologize when you do it, there is something wrong with you. You need to pay more attention to the people around you.
Bad on you for opening your door with the intent to prove a point. You should've taken a breath and handled it maturely and grabbed his info or at least his plate info and called the cops while he went into the store.
I would say it's bad on you given that you could have put yourself and your family in harms way if the other guy had been a crazy person or put yourself in a position to end up in jail if the other person started something and you hurt them. It wasn't that long ago that I remember a situation like that ending with someone getting shot at a WalMart not far from where I live. I just don't think it's worth potentially putting your family in jeopardy or risking jail essentially because someone smudged your Pumas. Getting out to check to see if there was a dent or scratch and maybe saying something to him is one thing, intentionally damaging his truck is another.
I agree with this point. It would have been smarter to call the cops. What you did was illegal. What he did was also illegal if you're sure he did it intentionally. Why would he have done it intentionally? You give no possible explanation. He was careless in slamming his door into yours. You ruined any potential insurance claim in getting your revenge and came off looking like a douche. You can't screw with someone's property because they screwed with yours. It makes absolutely no sense to do so when you don't know if they intended to do so. If a stranger were to spill a drink on you at the bar would you have to do the same to him? Do you want your kids to react the same way? I'm no Christian but something something turn the other cheek...
It's different when you have your wife and kids in the car though. You can always handle it in a different matter. You think El Toro is the only guy that wants to "stand his ground"? You do that to the next man pulling up and you might not be so lucky.
The only thing you could've really done differently was not hit his car in retaliation like you said. (no judgement from me, knowing I probably full well would've done the same thing) I know the curse words and his general demeanour afterwards weren't the best - but consider yourself lucky. You could've knocked on the door of tinman's car. "excuse me buddy, I don't want to be a jerk but you do know you just hit my car don't you?" "U WOT M8? MCGRADY ISN'T AN ALL STAR YAO IS U RN'T A TRUE FAN GO TO HELL TOF YOU DESERVE WORSE THAN A DENTED DOOR"
