Thanks for sharing, Leroy, and take good care. So glad you got to be with her at the end. My condolences to you and your family.
My condolences, leroy. I know first hand the misery of dialysis. I can sympathize with her choice. Take care of yourself.
so sorry for your loss breh. nothing i can say really to make things easier, but at least you know that we all wish you and your family the best. these threads are always very tough for me, i hate reading about other's losses. i still have both my parents, but whenever something hard hits my life, i've found talking to a religious leader helpful. sometimes they can ease the pain with wonderful stories of the afterlife and you just know your parents are in a good place.
So sorry to hear that, man. It's great you were there with her, and are there for your family now, but don't forget to take care of yourself too.
Thanks, guys. Yesterday was a little easier. My pain has shifted more to my dad and just watching him fight his pain, his anger, his just absolute heartbreak. I've had extended family and even close friends die before. While I grieved those, I was able to move on relatively quickly (something I got from my mom). It's not bottling it up. It's just the ability to move on to the next thing. This is harder. I was with my dad, brother, and my nephews yesterday. Both nephews are very young (1 and 2). I hate they don't get the opportunity to know her like my kids (12 and 8) did. Especially my oldest. He was the 1st grandchild. They had such a special connection that I almost felt it was unfair to the other grandkids...but it wasn't because she would make each of them feel like they were the most special. Man I'm going to miss her cooking and baking, too. She made the best cookies and pies. Her matzoh ball soup fixed everything. I don't know if there was a written recipe for it but I'm going to look. My dad wants to make sure we continue to get together for the high holidays. I want to make sure that part of her is there. I know I'll get to a place of peace and I know my dad will, too. I'm not trying to rush it...it's just that I'm not used to this.
Very sorry to hear this news, Leroy. Condolences to you, one of my favorite posters on this board, and your family during this difficult time. It sounds like she raised a great family.
Leroy, I can't imagine what you're going through. Well, I can imagine. But the truth of it would be beyond me. I know we'll all have to deal with this at one point or another. My parents are in their early 70's and each has health issues that remind me they won't be around forever. (Then again, who's to say how long any of us have?) Anyway, I'll take them as long as I can have them around. Take care of yourself and your dad and thanks for sharing with us here on Clutchfans. Yeah, like real family, we can get on each other's nerves, and we can disagree, but losing your mom is a kick in the heart and it hurts to even hear about it.
I've been where you are Leroy. My dad passed 19 years ago next month. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I had some of the same concerns for my mom after my dad passed away. I'm happy and relieved to say she handled it well...in some ways we got to know her in a way we hadn't before and in some ways her life blossomed in ways unanticipated. In the meantime, stay as positive as you can, grieve when you need to, lean on your family and friends, be there for your dad and the rest of your family and it will get better. You have my prayers.
I'm glad you had a moment where you could be with your mom one last time. Please extend my condolences to you and your family.
Sorry for your loss. I lost my uncle who raised me a week before graduating college and then my grandma who raised me as well two months before my wedding. For me, even though their memories are ingrained in my heart I still have those days that I hurt. It's been 8 years since my uncle passed and two years for my grandma. I think it's just one of those things you definitely get used to but at the same time you just have those bad days that you just wish they were here. I was extremely close to both of them, and even though I have a beautiful wife and an awesome dog, there are days that I just feel lonely. I wish I could go visit them, go talk to them. My grandma went through dialysis for four years before she passed. It was the same situation as you, she was in the hospital due to an infection and then her BP suddenly dropped and it was just all over. I was there with her. I miss her a lot. I hope you find peace OP and that you are able to go through this process with your pops.
They're pretty damn resilient. My oldest had a special connection to her being her first grandchild. They got to say their goodbyes before it was too late. They've pretty much gotten back into their daily rhythms but tell me at night before bed that they're still sad. I remind them that it's ok and it's going to take a while. I'm already seeing another side of my dad that I didn't expect. He's absolutely heartbroken, sad, and at times angry. But he's had a chance to think about this future more than he wanted to lately and he's got some plans. He's already looking to make a trip back east to see 1 of his sisters and then west to see the other. He wants to take a cruise. He's staying in the house, even if only because he will not sell his '61 Impala and there's no good place to store that tank. Most everything is paid off so he should be fine, financially. He has no intentions of sitting still for too long because he knows what that means. His parents both lived well into their 90's so, based on that, he's likely got a long while to go. There's a part of me a little pissed that she decided to be cremated. I selfishly wanted that one place I could visit when I needed to or for her birthday or Mother's Day. She had always talked of having a traditional Jewish ceremony which used to forbid cremation. I guess the rules changed somewhere down the road. I plan to use some of her remains to plant a tree in my yard.
