Why are you afraid to have dinner with a gay guy? Is the only reasonable answer to that that you are afraid you will give in to temptation?
are you hitting me? seriously, I don't want him to have any ideas. added to that I don't just meet guys gay or not and go out to dinner.
Do you remember what his reaction was when you told him you were married?? Did he act like he didn't hear you or did he brush you off (act like he didn't care)? To me that is weird that he would continue to hit on you after you told him you were married. Maybe he thought you would be interested in experimenting or you had some bisexual tendencies or as someone else said, you are just incredibly hot, pgabriel. But yea that would annoy the **** out of me, too. There's a dude who works down the hall from me and everyone knows that he is a closet gay. I speak to him and get along with him but he knows that I am married and am not "changing teams" anytime soon. When homosexuals do stuff like this (what this guy did to pgabriel), it is the worst possible thing they can do because it just reinforces all the negative stereotypes that heterosexual people have of them.
Hell .. . I'm generally oblivious to it because I cannot conceive a guy is hitting on me My friend who happened to be gay He, Me and friends [male and female] would be out then afterwards he'd tell me how a waiter or some dude was hitting on me I of course called bullsh*t . . figuring he messing with me However. . in hindsight . . i don't think he was I am . .. umh , . . .more aware now sometimes P . . . you have to be brutally honest Rocket River
Manny, how is this different from a chick (or a guy) hitting on a married person because they think that person is hot, and don't care if they are married, or not. And THAT happens all the time. D&D. Impeach Bush's Dog!!!
that's really the issue, I don't want to stereotype people. that's one of the reasons I don't just say "look i'm not gay" because it is a negative stereotype of gay guys that they will go after you regardless of your sexual orientation. i'm sure some of them find it offensive.
On that score, I'd point out that it is hard for a gay man to have a normal friendship with another man because of the suspicion of romantic interests. It is possible that he knows you're straight but would like some male camaraderie, and you seemed to be at enough ease with him that he's hoping his being gay would not be an impediment to a friendship. (Or, of course, he could be hoping you swing both ways.)
1:55 Mark. Language NSFW <object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Dcr8dm9Prkk"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Dcr8dm9Prkk" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>
I should be more specific also because you make some interesting points. first of all this isn't the negative image alot of us have about gay guys type of guy. he's an older white male, probably close to 50. he's well educated, he's a technical writer. and he just moved here from iowa, so he probably is just looking for some friends. I actually enjoyed the coversation, maybe next time I see him i'll just tell him straight out I don't mind talking to him but that I'm no way interested in him in that way.
Why don't you have him over to your house? Invite him over for dinner with you and your wife. Hopefully he gets the picture, and maybe you make a friend.
I have been hit on a lot by gay guys as well and I couldn't tell that he was indeed hitting on you from the original story. You say he is new in town, older, etc...maybe he is just looking for people to hang around with. Also, did he tell you he is gay or something or are you just assuming? In any event, I don't see why it is a big deal or an "issue" or something that others "hate". If a man or woman shows interest in me I am flattered. I am happily married so it doesn't matter. If a man finds me attractive who cares? Doesn't mean we cant be friends if we get along, or I can't talk to him for 5 minutes at a public place or whatever the situation. Again, just the same as a woman in a similar situation. Of course I have had plenty of female and gay friends so it is not unusual to me.
Deckard, I see your point; however, my experience is that a gay man hitting on a straight guy happens far less than a straight guy hitting on a woman who is either taken, married, or just not interested. If I lived in a bigger city like a New York or San Francisco or Chicago, I guess it probably wouldn't be such an unusual happening. But as it is, that is something that doesn't happen very often (at least to me or to people I know outside of this BBS).
Do you have his number? Maybe he's like to get together for a salad and a glass of wine.. Er, uh....I mean... How 'bout that Texans game on Sunday. Helluva game, helluva game...
