All this history of the circumstances of conception aside, is there any reason why you wouldn't want to commit to her for life? Is she not good wife material? I'm asking because the best thing you can do for your kids right now is to commit to a solid 100% marital relationship. I don't like the "my kids will always eat even if the relationship does not work out" attitude. You're already sowing seeds for problems. No matter how much you remain committed to your children, you'll never be able to do better for them than you would if they were raised inside of a stable, healthy marriage.
The reason I said my kids will always eat thing is because anything can happen. I don't think you have to be marry or even be with the mother of your child to be a great father. You have to do what best for the kids, but at some time you have to do what best for yourself because if one of the party's is unhappy it won't last. I'm doing what I feel it best now I'm trying to keep us a happy family thats why shes my fiance now because I do want to commit to her.
Ya know...everyone is right in this thread. I think we all have had experiences with people bringing kids into this world when you can see that it will be a disaster, we also have seen people bringing kids into the world and things working out perfectly. If you are going to post your business on a message board, then you should expect people reflecting on both positive and negative experiences to respond. Seems that the OP is fine with that. If you post something like this, you are going to be judged, you should expect it. Why else would you post something like that? I think we can all agree that we hope things work out for the best. Hopefully they do.
Without putting my two cents into this debate about what's right and wrong, I'm just going to say congratulations and that I hope you have a healthy baby.
Well congratulations on your new soon to be addition. You seem very excited!! You just do what you need to do. Continue on trying to improve the relationship you have now. Its never easy but definately not impossible. If both of yall are willing to sacrifice yourselves and better yourself for the other then things can turn out wonderfully! Definately the children is a motivation to wanting to stay together but shouldnt be the only reason, but that doesn't seem to apply to you since you seem to love her dearly. Kudos to you for making the effort that so many people give up on. Again, congratulations
