I've got another Aggie joke, similar to the last one.... A Longhorn, a Raider, and an Aggie went to Mexico. They got into a huge boatload of trouble and they were going to be executed. The Longhorn was tied to a post and was asked if he wanted the blindfold, and he said no. The Mexican General said, "Ready, Aim..." Then suddenly the Longhorn shouted, "TORNADO!!!" Everyone runs for their life and the Longhorn manages to escape and lives happily ever after. The Raider gets tied to the post and is asked if he wants the blindfold, he said no. The General again said, "Ready, Aim...." Then the Raider shouted out, "RATTLESNAKES!!!" The Riflemen turn around and the Raider escapes back to Texas and never goes back to Mexico. The Aggie gets tied to the post and he gets the same deal as the other two, but as the General was yelling, "Ready, Aim..." The Aggie yelled, "FIRE! FIRE! FI..."
A pirate stumbles into a bar with a boat steering wheel shoved down his pants. The bartender asks, "You have a steering wheel shoved down your pants! Doesn't that hurt?" The pirate answers, "ARRRRRRRR! It's driving me nuts!"
redux.. ________ Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing on the war. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed." "Oh NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!" His staff sits stunned at this incredible display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands clearly in a state of shock. Finally, after several minutes the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"
Nah. The joke works better with someone who was arrested for DUI. I, on the other hand, have never been caught.
Actually heard this joke through an email way before the BBS so we can't blame the BBS for that one hahah
Still up in bed A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where's Mom and dad?" and she replied, "they're up in bed." The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "where's Mom and Dad?" and she replied "they're still up in bed." Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma "where's Mom and dad?" and his grandmother replied "they're still up in bed." The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "what gives? Every time I tell you they're still up in bed you start to laugh! what is going on here?" The little boy replied, "well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue."
Fluctuations An Asian man was trying to exchange yen for dollars and asks the American bank teller, "Why it change? Yestoday I get two hunat dollar fo yen - today I get hunat eighty? The bank teller says, "Fluctuations." The Asian man says, "Fluc you white guys too!"
Mickey Mouse is in court trying to divorce Minnie Mouse the confused judge once again asks Mickey "So, you're seeking a divorce on the grounds that she's benn acting a little strange?" Mickey, exasperated, repeats "No! I keep telling you she's been ***king Goofey!"
