Poem sucked. Flow was terrible and made it unpleasant to read. I recommend you learn what poetic meter is. Start using it and maybe your poem quality will improve.
Heroin, be the death of me Heroin, it's my wife and it's my life Because a mainer to my vein Leads to a center in my head And then I'm better off than dead Because when the smack begins to flow I really don't care anymore About all the Jim-Jim's in this town And all the politicians makin' busy sounds And everybody puttin' everybody else down And all the dead bodies piled up in mounds 'Cause when the smack begins to flow Then I really don't care anymore Ah, when the heroin is in my blood And that blood is in my head Then thank God that I'm as good as dead Then thank your God that I'm not aware And thank God that I just don't care And I guess I just don't know And I guess I just don't know Lou Reed
Golden brown texture like sun Lays me down with my mind she runs Throughout the night No need to fight Never a frown with golden brown Every time just like the last On her ship tied to the mast To distant lands Takes both my hands Never a frown with golden brown Golden brown finer temptress Through the ages she's heading West From far away Stays for a day Never a frown with golden brown Never a frown With golden brown Never a frown With golden brown --The Stanglers
We been dancin' with Mr. Brownstone He's been knockin' He won't leave me alone No, no ,no, he won't leave me alone I used ta do a little but a little wouldn't do So the little got more and more I just keep tryin' ta get a little better Said the little better than before I used ta do a little but a little wouldn't do So the little got more and more I just keep tryin' ta get a little better Said the little better than before
