I'm pretty much the same. I graduated from HS in 2005 then went straight to San Jac CC when I should of just taken time off. In my first semester i hardly went, i'm still registered and hardly go still. I just dont see myself going to school, having to study and all that crap. I cant. I just cant concentrate. Maybe its because none of the subjects really grab my attention. Ive always thought about being a cop, been wanting to be one since i was little, so recently i applied for some Police Departments, hoping i'll get a call soon for the exam. Im just 20 and i know theres still a lot ahead of me. Hopefully the cop situation will work out for me because i think its a job i would love to do, but school just really doesnt interest me right now and i dont know if it ever will...
Think about the good side, it's good to be young and can afford to waste some time. God I wish I was 21 years old. I know about people like you. It's a stage many people go through. In this particular stage of self searching, it doesn't matter what you want to do, and it doesn't matter if you don't know what to do. It's not your fault, you are just not in a position to know yet. What you do and want to do is not important right now, the key is do something, anything to stay in touch with the outside world. The worst thing is to sit at home indefinitely trying to learn stuff on your own, eventually, you'd be bored to the core yet feel powerless to make a change. The longer you sit at home, the worse you feel, and the weaker you feel. So, don't stay disconnected with the outside world. Get in touch. Go to school, go to a training camp, find a job, join the army, go to a church, do some volunteering work... whatever to do, do it now. Sitting at home try to learn about life in isolation is a bad habit, for home is an empty space where people got their hands full in the outside world return and recharge themselves. The longer you stay at home, the emptier you'd be. The sooner you break it, the better off you'd be. To borrow Nike's motto, just do it. Go out and do something.
I think it's customary in Europe for kids to graduate from high school, take a year off (work, travel, whatever), then go to college. Seems like it would do many people good here too. I wish it was standard here, I probably would've done it and been better off for it.
You won't find it over night. You won't find it in a week, nor a month. Whatever you find, it will consume you and you will not have time to even think about being lost. Everyone is different. To take a single piece of advise is just as much as a crap shoot as anything else. Who knows where it will come from or what form it will come in. Its also a never ending change. There came a point in my life that I felt like my eyes were opened. I made great strides in coming closer to the person i felt like I wanted to be. Since the beginning of the year, I felt like i've tripped and fell flat on my face. I feel like im further than i ever been, but I don't have that lost feeling. I know what direction I defiantly do not want to take. The answer is out there, you just need to keep searching. Who knows where it will be
Have you tried applying to a four year university and getting your bachelors? Academically CCs aren't that far away from four year universities, I know since i transfered to one, but the feel and environment are a lot different. Biggest difference being there are a lot more people at the universities and its easy to meet people and make new friends through clubs/frats and university functions.
I've read several posters stating that they felt college was a waste of time. This is very true of any formal education. Try not to focus on the time you are wasting and focus instead on trying new things and having fun. Education is an investment in your future. A vast majority of what you learn during your studies will be forgotten, but your odds of being successful in the working world go up dramatically with at least a bachelors degree. Those that "waste time" getting a degree will most likely be much more successful, financially, than those who don't. My point is that you don't have to understand why you're doing it, but you should most certainly do it. High school was the same way. I'm in my third year of law school, and most of the things I have to do to graduate won't help me one iota when I start practicing law. But I need the education to get my foot into the profession. College is similar in general, as almost all jobs with salaries above 40K a year require (or at least strongly prefer) a bachelors degree. My suggestion: don't put college off and don't make excuses! Don't waste your opportunity to focus on school without the demands of work and family that will inevitably come as you get older. Just do it!
My advice is first a job... It doesn't sound like much but a job gets you out there socially, you'll HAVE to be involved in the world and while un-employed a job sounds like the sucks, when you have one you feel different, you feel connected or something. Secondly after the job, look back into going to school... I don't see college as being something you need (I'm going in aviation/helicopters and college is while I guess could look good on any resume, is just about worthless in my field) BUT I still take the occasional college class just to get a credit or two here and there. I'm in no rush in life... 2 years ago I was stuck in a situation very similar to yours, and a job is what changed my life around. job job job, its the path to take
Get a job, feel empowered, and then work into getting in a real college. You might still feel directionless, but at least you'll have some income to spend and chicks to bang.
Do you exercise? Sounds funny, but emersing myself in exercise went a long way to helping me out when I needed it.
I'm don't know if I was ever in your position exactly, but I feel like I can relate somewhat... I went to San Jac too, actually didn't finish my basics, but got a Certificate of Technology in something I don't even care about, so even after that, I felt horrible. Near the end of school I started a pretty sad job, in the sense of damaging to my pride feeling like I should be above working minimum wage (i eventually got raises) with high schoolers and having to fill in for them during prom and trash like that. Situations in my personal life mandated that I get a new job to be able to pay for both me and my family. I felt stuck however, because in order to get enough money I had to work all the time and let myself be taken advantage of by the company and other employees and smile doing it. Then I suddenly quit on them, and they can carry their own burden. My presence as a workhorse there anchored the schedule, especially now that several of the workers are back in school, they don't have me to count on to be there all the time. I have been smiling a lot more since then, and for once I actually sat down and made a resume. I contacted a temp agency and they seem optimistic to get me a boringass white collar job because I'm pretty good at typing. The refinery/railroad/hellish labor jobs are always going to be there, so I've been seeing where I stand with jobs that are 1) dayjobs, 2) pay something reasonable and 3) leave me enough time and energy to devote to my passion. Do you have a passion of your own, Extraordinary? Something that even seems like a pipedream? At least do something back in Community College, get some sort of paper for all your money and work. Get jobs for experience and income, think positive, find a mode of stability, and then work from there. Get your head in a good place, and attack your problems
I graduated college a couple years ago and still have no idea what I want to do. I had never really given it any serious thought before, but I decided to give HPD a try a few months ago and ended up failing the fitness exam so now I'm back to start. Not sure if I want to try again. I was kind of disappointed because I had put a lot of effort into getting in shape for the exam.
Would you happen to know inside you what kind of successful person that is? Can you define it, write it down on paper? Even if its something like being an actor or musician or baker, its what YOU want to do. You can be a manager in your 40's at a big company, they lay you off and you have to "live with the parents"....all it means is that you're in transition, it doesnt mean you're a failure or anything.. you yourself say its not bad...so then believe your own words and dont make it negative, its NOT College is unexpectedly tough. Leave it behind for a little bit and get a job SOMEWHERE. Maybe you wont have "goals or plans" but you at least have SOME direction - which is making money. Not being penniless - thats direction enough. And you might can meet a friend or 2 at the workplace, maybe even a nice lil gal. What the "this" you refer to, being young and undecided? Dont be so hard on yourself, we've ALL been at a crossroads where we dont know our next move... Here's what I would suggest: - If you can, talk to your parents or whoever you're staying with and express to them your difficulties. That way they'll know you mean well and wont 'force' you to make a move and apply too much tough love on you... - Talk to a therapist, counselor, psychologist, ANYBODY who is there to help you cope. You'd be suprised how much just venting to some listening ears can help clear your mind and body. I DEFINITELY have a problem with this, trying to figure everything out for myself and putting too much pressure and work on myself...Trust me when I say you should seek out those type resources. Things you SHOULDNT do: - Spend TOO much time away from college. Because once you're out its that much harder to get back in. - Do not, i repeat do NOT "look for love" or get married to ease the pain of loneliness. Help YOURSELF FIRST before you put effort into something exhausting like the expectations of family and fatherhood. - Do not compare yourself to this guy and that guy... The world is WAY too darn extreme now. They've created standards now for school, work, material possessions, and social life thats unrealistic for 90% of people out there. You go by your OWN natural clock. - Think that you're the only one feeling like you do, or you're the worst example. There's many around you who are only faking like they know what they're doing and are as in the dark as you are. Hope that helps, good luck to you
You are being such a puss. Did you really think life is gonna be a easy ride? That someone is going to put everything on a silver platter for you? Get real! Most of things we want in life we have to fight for it. I have the same goal as you have. I don't really care what I do for a living, as long as I'm rich and successful, and can retire before hitting 40. And I have been in the exact same spot as you are. My sophomore year I was doing so bad in school that I almost dropped out. But I know the minute I put my head down, life will step all over me. So I changed. I stop partying, no more weed, and I studied my ass off. Now I'm one year from graduating with a high GPA, and getting paid 25 bucks an hour working as an intern at a fortune 500 company. So stop whining and get up and do something. People here can give the best advices in the world, but it won't matter unless you know it in your heart that you have to change.
Success is not about luck, its about education and damn hard work. Everybody fails, but if you keep, keep trying statistically you will succeed. It might not be up to your wildest dreams, but its success nonetheless. I despise when people use the word luck. Luck did not have me wake up at 4:30 this morning to run 3 miles and then be at my office at 7 after going to sleep at midnight last night. That is sheer determination. Get off your a$$ and get an education and a job.
"Happiness" means different things to different people. Find your own happiness...money will find it's way in due time. 15 years ago, when I was 31, I was living in a one room 300 sqft apt in LA and driving a rusted Toyota Tercel that had it's entire passenger side caved in from a wreck. Today I own a house in Houston and drive a Lexus. Am I happy? Kinda happy. I'm about a 70% on the happiness scale. I would like to find a new, more challenging and more rewarding day gig. I mean, if I have to work during the day, I'd like it to be enjoyable and rewarding, where I work with motivated, focused people. On the good side, I'm in love with a beautiful woman who is definitely the love of my life (just celebrated our one year anniversary) and I play in two great bands, both of which I enjoy. You've got to find your own happiness in life, and you should never compare your "happy" to someone elses. If you do that, more often than not, you will be severely disappointed.
