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Anyone else think that this time next week he'll be telling us how he asked her to marry him and she didn't give him an answer right away?
You should introduce her to the thadeus. She'll have a new obsession, and you won't have to worry about her any more.
Why do people invite so much needless drama into their lives?? Sorry, but if I'm with a girl who is cutting her wrists, I'm out of there like yesterday. Unless you are a licensed psychotherapist, you have no business trying to save her. You're just making it worse. Get out. And another thing... Why in the world are some many people so afraid of being alone?? What's wrong with being alone?? Are you scared that you may actually have to (gasp!) live your life? Instead of hiding in someone elses? There are soldiers being deployed every day who would give anything to make it back with their lives....and then we have people over here who HAVE their lives, but are wasting them because they're afraid....afraid of being alone.....
So true. So very true. Thanks for the advice everyone! Just an update, she majorly pissed me off the other day, so I have been ignoring her calls and texts now. I guess it's a step in the right direction...
1) Need pics 2) Nothing wrong with being alone... 3) You've come to a point in your relationship where you've out grown each other...Nothing wrong with that, but don't cheat on her...Man up and break up with her...Now, you can still love her, but it'll be more in a way where you want her to be happy...
I finally did it. I manned up and broke up with her. I'm just afraid of the relapses. Thanks for all the advice guys...it's gonna be a tough new years.
If you don't feel it, then it's for the best. Chances are, if you see her with another dude, you'll want her back. Don't do it.
That's an excellent point. I've had plenty of periods of being alone and while compainionship is nice its not worth it to be stuck with someone who you can't get along with. Many people seem to feel that being alone is the worse thing that can ever happen to you but there's so much to do in life that even if you are alone there's still a lot you can fill your life with. Lets not forget Internet p*rn heh heh. Seriously though there worse things than being alone and also for those who fear being alone and become desperate few things destroy a potential relationship as desperation.
Good luck to you and my advice is take sometime to enjoy yourself. Hit the town for New Years and if you have some vacation time and can afford it go travel. A break up is almost never easy but sometimes it is necessary.
I talked to her again today, because she keeps calling me and I just wanted to tell her to stop. I talked to her, and made it clear to her that it is over. But the things she said, I feel totally guilty for leaving her and abandoning the future we had envisioned. She told me the things she said "was in anger" and that I should understand "what is in her heart." I feel so crummy for breaking up with her now, because I had promised her that I would always understand her. She told me that I "never understood what was in her heart." Why am I doubting myself now? There is a part of me that wants to stay with her because I believe it is the right thing to do after all the promises we made each other. Why do I feel so guilty for this? I am just not happy with her anymore and I think it is the right thing to do. She still wants to try to fix it even after pretty much a year of fighting, I feel like a quitter now
^ As I said breaking up is never easy. Not knowing you or your GF I don't have any good advice but from my own experience if you breakup with someone and then you get back together things might seem to be better for awhile but then after awhile they are back to where they were before. About the only advice I can give you that might be worth a damn is if you feel really guilty and want to get back with her I suggest you talk it over to a trusted friend who knows you both and / or couples counseling.
On the surface, it sounds like you want to crawl back out of obligation and a desire to fix a problem that you feel you are responsible. Are the problems you had before are still there? Why did you have "chest pains, headaches, loss of sleep, MAJOR anxiety, some schizophrenia"? A professional counselor could very well start with a very basic test and ask for you to give the intensity of each symptom on a level of 0-10 at different periods of time (such as thinking about her, being with her, how you normally are, after working out) Do feel these pains when you don't think about her? Is the stress of breaking up affecting your health and judgement? I am not professional help. IMO, health symptoms from you and a history of self mutilation from her is something beyond what Clutchfan Joe can remedy. My simplest advice would be to extend the break to gain a little more perspective on what single life means and what the relationship was doing for you. Supposedly time would allow you to see both the good and bad, but it's never that easy.
This is the only thing I see in your post. If you don't understand her and what's in her heart, and you never did/do - then really, there's not much to base a relationship off of anyway - you two are on two different planets, maybe even in two different universes. It's for the best, dude. Just continue to "man up" and keep things OVER.
Guilt is just a feeling and feelings pass. Besides, you should only feel guilty if you did something wrong. Did you do anything wrong? If your best friend told you that he felt guilty for breaking up with someone, would you tell him to get back together with her? Is that the kind of advice you would give your best friend?
I don't think she understood him either. A successful relationship needs to go both ways and I don't think trying to guilt one party into staying in it is the way to go.
ahhh the fine line between hate and love. I didn't read the whole thread, but my advice... end it now before it gets worse. Edit... never mind.. I need to check the dates on these threads Edit 2: That's downright poetic! Everyone listen to the drummer, he is a smart man.
