I'm good with women over time, but not as a one-nighter. I'm married now, so I have to try and pick up women as a team. It's easier in some ways, but harder in others.
I remember when I was younger around 16 I was fat, used to wear glasses and very shy, and also came from a poor family, despite all of this I was always pretty good with women because of my personality. Even when I was a dork I always had a gift with women where I could meet them and start talking to them and 5 minutes later they are telling me deep things about themselves that they never told anyone. They told me that I made them feel so comfortable and that it felt so natural to be with me and it scared them because they barely knew me. Now 12 years later I started my own company and a pretty successful, am in the best shape of my life thanks to lots of time at the gym and a good diet, a good looking intelligent guy, and I travel the globe. I can say confidently now that I am very good with women and am dating several right now. When I decide to commit I won't feel like I lost out or didn't have fun or been with enough women. In that aspect I have been living a very fulfilling life for a long time now and thank God no kids, diseases or divorces. The difference in my past and present is profound a as far as physical. However I realized when it comes to women honestly, money, power, looks are secondary. Having experienced two totally different lifestyles I have come to realize that for women attraction comes from within. A good personality, confidence, intrigue, passion for life, these things are like drugs for women. The more I travel and more experiences I have the more I realize this.
I've always been a relationship guy. I always had girls that wanted to have relationships with me but I've always been terrible at the casual sex thing. I'm just too considerate of the girls feelings and terrible at small talk for the sake of getting someone in the sack.
VERY Successful. Although I am married, I was successful during my bachelor times. Some chicks turned me down to dance or to go out, but I don't consider that as unsuccessful. Mostly I met all women through friends, school, church, or work, and they all worked out well. I don't think I ever met any chick at a club and expected myself to be "successful" with her. Maybe it was just to dance or to have a drink and that was it. The question was "with women", and 1 isn't "women", it's "woman", sir. But I don't think that applies to you replicants, just us humans.
There is some really good advice in this thread. A lot of what was said is spot on: - Don't give a damn - Confidence - Show disinterest - Be a challenge All of these are proven to work. Mine is a little different. If I see a very attractive girl that I like I won't hesitate to go up to her and directly tell her that I find her attractive enough to make me want to get to know her better. In the space of the 5 minutes that we talk is usually when I seal the deal as far as being such a "different" guy. I am always honest, lots of times brutally and its refreshing. I maintain a mysterious demeanor and dont ever reveal too much but just enough so she can see that there is much more to me than meets the eye. Finally I make her feel very comfortable like we have known each other for years and don't apologize for asking questions that most guys would not dare to ask after just meeting a beautiful girl. As she is laughing and having a good time, thats when I turn the attraction up by touching and often turning the conversation sexual. You guys would be shocked to know how many women respond to this as long as you DO IT RIGHT. We get nervous that if we say something she will get offended but women are very interested in sex and many love to talk about it. As the conversation becomes very heated and she is totally interested, depending on how much time I have in a certain city, I end it and leave and get her contact info. This usually shocks the hell out of them and makes them crazy for more.
Pretty good; I have been married to the same one for thirty-eight years, and she is my best friend. We have had ridiculous amounts of fun together.
GOOD advice for all those younger bachelors, sir. If I may, I would like to add: - have some cash, but not too much - don't brag - be "mysterious" - be bigger than previous potential mates (that's what SHE said :grin: ) - extraordinary and in style is what I mean I have been married with Mrs. SwoLy for 12 years and we have ZILCH stuff in common but have been able to find the "common ground" and had fun raising our girls together. Basically, we've "adapted" to each other. If you don't want to do that, then don't keep the one you're thinking about.
That is hilarious. It is my lifelong dream to be named in a catchphrase! OK, so it is not my name and it is on the interwebs, but I appreciate it nonetheless. I thought people might think I was trying to brag so I am glad it did not come accross that way. My last 5 years have been very strange. It gets to be work turning down offers. Ugly chicks are one thing but the hot ones...good thing my moral compass doesn't exist.
You know SwoLy you make a good point. When I am ready to settle down I want a girl who is very different from me. I want her to have the strengths in the areas where I am weak and vice versa. I think the way you said it as far as adapting to each other is a good route. Obviously your core values and beliefs should be congruent or it could cause problems in the future.
wanna get the girl, act like you already have one. there's a reason why when you're single, it seems no girls were interested. as soon as you got a g/f, other girls start hitting on you.
The cockiness is to get your feet in, but if you keep the Ladder Theory in mind, girls can justify whatever crazy or sweet things you do if they really like you.
I've always been pretty good with girls and have never cared as they were all secondary to work. I've broken a number of hearts (not my intention) but have always had a constant supply of women. Then I met the girl of my dreams and I became a total fool. She wanted me to be something that I wasn't and let her walk on me. We ended it but she destroyed me. Its easy to be the cool, mysterious, stand-offish guy until you're head over heels with a girl.
I'd say getting a chick is pretty easy. Regardless of whether it is just a fling or a serious relationship. You just have to make her realize she wants you. It takes patience as well sometimes. But, ehh I definitely think that more guys should be able to be successful with women..
I am not a remotely a Cassanova but have had my share of success. There is a lot of good advice on this thread and confidence is definately the key. Being non-chalant (seeming to be not interested) is good but at the sametime if you are too non-chalant you can really miss out. I've had a couple of occasions where women that I have either ended up with romantically or kept a friendship with later on tell me that they didn't think I was interested in them so they backed off or moved onto someone else. A well timed compliment or just letting them know you are interested can make a huge difference. Like most things timing is important. A lot of how you approach women depends on context. How do you know the woman you are interested, where do you see her, and how often do you see her. How you are going to approach a woman you've never seen before at a bar versus someone you work with and see all the time is going to be completely different. Also keep in mind what works for one guy isn't always going to work for another. There are alot of douchebags and a dumbasses that get a lot of women that doesn't mean that being a douchebag and a dumbass is going to get you a lot of women. Bottomline is that its hard for men to understand women and if I did I would probably be spending a lot less time on Clutchfans. The best thing to do though is be confident and don't be afraid of rejection. Also you might want to talk to women that you know and trust, friends or sisters, and they can probably help you alot more than guys on a sports message board.
