How often do you visit your parents or even call them?

I do recall I had a friend who died back in 1999. I wrote his parents a nice letter after he died talking about their son and good things about what he meant to me as well as letting them know some stuff about him they may not have known from my experiences with him. We had hung out in college, took some classes together, partied together, shared common friends, etc. . They appreciated that and wrote me back. One of the things that they said to me never left me...and that was they didn't hear from their son that often (or, as often as they liked) and then he died tragically. I'm not sure they even talked to him in the days before he died. I think they were a bit upset about that...not having been in close contact enough to really know what was going on with their son. And, then to receive that phone call that he died. I could tell from reading what they wrote me about the circumstances of his death (which were a bit perplexing and semi-lacking in detail to say the least) that they were hurting over not only the death but lack of contact in the times before that.

I know some of us may not have much to discuss with our parents at times...but it is important to keep that line of communication open if you really care about your parents. I can predict how my conversations go with my parents. I would term many of the conversations pretty stale with saying the same things over and over. But, I think it's just the act of hearing the voices and staying in touch to where your parents don't feel left out in the cold by their own children. I know what my parents have sacrificed and done for me. I would never want my parents to feel that way about me (i.e. don't know really what's up with me as much as they would like)...and I am probably guilty of going a while at times without speaking to or seeing them. But, as we all age, I am definitely making more of an effort to see them and I'm sure they appreciate that. Life is not all happiness and a bed of roses a lot of times. Life can be a total beatdown at times. But, that's not really an excuse for not being in touch. That said...I don't have enough to say (nor do they as I'm sure they would admit) to be in contact daily when everything is routine. I find weekly works for me and I think it works for them. I plan on seeing them tomorrow and going to eat seafood. They love to eat out. I know that much.

 

My parents and I call once or twice a week. I'm not that fond of calling people on the phone

I think we visit about once or twice a month. WE life about 50 minutes drive from each other.

 

I called my mama this mornin' cause of this thread...

 

My pops lives in Iowa, but we see each other whenever we can for holidays and such.(I'm in Houston.) We talk each weekend for the most part though.
-Cleverly disquised Guilt-Trip thread.(you must be a mom, JP)

 

Not as much as I should. My parents live on the other side of the world so its hard getting our schedules synched.

 

I haven't seen nor spoken to my parents in almost twenty years.

They're dead.

Thanks for rubbing it in.

 

Man, I must be a horrible son to my parents. This thread is making me feel guilty.

I email them all the time but probably only talk to them once or twice a month. They both live here in town too. I mean, I love them both very much and always see them on birthdays, holidays, etc. but I'm in my 40's now and don't feel the need to talk to them 4 or 5 times a week. Is that wrong? They raised me to be an independent adult, so that's pretty much the way it's always been, especially since I got married.

 

Same here. Since I moved to Austin in 1999, I speak to my parents about 1x a week. Sometimes more...sometimes less. I see them every few months. They either come here or we go to The Woodlands. I just haven't felt the need to speak to my mother every day or even close to that. I don't feel guilty about it. We catch up most Sundays and she gets to talk to the grandkids. I don't see anything wrong in that.

 

Props to the OP. I'm calling now.

 

Well I used to be like ima and leroy in that I would talk to my parents on the phone about every other day or sometimes every day and maybe see them once every 2 weeks because I am pushing 40 and I have my own family.

That all changed when I decided to divorce my wife. I am now living with my parents until I can get back on my feet again. So the answer to the question is all the time since I live with them. And although it is not the most optimal thing or what I saw myself doing at this point in my life; I am so damn grateful that I have parents that are allowing me to stay with them. I love them so much and don't know what I'll do when they are gone.