How long do you wait for a girl to respond to a text message before you give up?

whatever. don juan. :grin:

 

I am not don juan, but if it were me I would not ask her out anymore, but I think rejecting her if she asks you is silly unless you have better prospects in the works and cannot afford the time/effort/cash.

Worst case senario is you get a pity date, but that could always end with a pity HJ/BJ. More likely will end with a dinner out with someone you liked. Surefire sign it was a pity date is she actually offers to split or pay the check.

 

not ashamed to admit i was once a doormat. hell, the OP reminds me of me. i've just been through it enough times to recognize the signs of rejection. he probably can still get a date out of her if doesn't come off as desperate. but as CaseyH mentioned, it could be a pity date. does anyone really want that?

 

Same boat here, mac is bringing nothing but 100% facts so far. Like I said, most of us guys have been through something similar, happened to me a few times as well. At first I handled it the bad way, wait a few hours for a response then I'd respond instantly, at the time you don't think of it as anything but when you look back you realize a lot more than you did then. I'm pretty sure he already text her back though.

I can only echo what a few of the other guys have said, odds are she doesn't text you back today, if that's the case you do NOT text her until a few hours after the next time she sends you one, if she does. Ladies love the attention.

 

Only you know this girl, does she seem to be the type of girl to have scumbag qualities? Don't sweat it too much. The fishes will always end up biting.

 

i think that you need to have faith in girls. i don't think you can say that this girl is treating him like a doormat. ****, a lot of girls change their mind, they have panic attacks, unable to make decisions. the easiest thing to do is make an excuse. doesn't mean she doesn't like him. in fact, any girl that gives you her number has an interest in you. girls don't give out numbers to guys that they don't have an interest in. period.

 

yeah but at this point you have to wait for her to bring it up. If she is rejecting you cannot ask her again and make her come up with excuses three times.

 

I would say wait at least a week. Avoid the unnecessary Valentine's date.

 

Why is this stuff so complicated? Just call her and if she thinks you are being creepy or whatever then just move on to the next one until you are with someone who thinks that the fact you want to call is a nice thing and not something to rant about in her fb or twitter acct?

 

I don't agree with this. it is the GUYS responsibility, not the girls, to set up a date.

also, i just forgot, next week is valentine's day. i'd balk on a date too close to valentine's. they aren't a couple yet. i'd be too weird to go out with that kind of pressure.

whatever you do, don't set up a date on valentine's day. egads.

 

He tried, twice. At this point if she really wanted it she would bring it up. Possibly not directly but in conversation. If she rejected him, him moving on would be welcomed. In no case would it be a good move to ask a third time.

 

you'll be a lonely guy waiting for a girl to ask you out on a date. you guys must think all girls "crap" is just some secret game to get you worked up or something?

that just doesn't make sense. you realize that the hardest thing for a girl to get rid of is some crazy hardup guy. that's why they protect their numbers, because you can't get rid of a hardup dude.

 

uh, what, what? it's actually quite common for girls to give out their numbers to guys they don't have interest in. it's just another game they play for attention. i haven't called OP a doormat but here are some doormatitis that he's exibited:

1. calls girl to set up date, girl says to reschedule, OP reschedules
2. girl says text her THE DAY of in case she's busy, OP texts her
3. girl says she's sick, call her next week, OP obliges.

there's no sign of interest on the girl's part whatsoever. everytime he does her bidding, it makes her feel good. that's why he needs to leave it be and let her step up to make plans.

 

Take the advice given by this man

 

I'll give you the advice the girl I liked once told me: "YOU THINK TOO MUCH!" She's not playing games, she doesn't pity you, she's not even thinking about this as much as you (we) are. She's just busy (or really sick). You seem paranoid that she didn't respond soon, it happens. Don't drive yourself crazy over it, it means nothing. Wait a while but I think you should reply. In a few days ask her how she's feeling (after being sick) and reschedule, but don't text, give her a call, and have a short casual conversation. I'm sure she would love that. My suggestion.

 

Don't consider it waiting, they should feel special that you texted them or you are wasting your time. So if they don't reply **** em.

 

Don't reply. Ever. If she said "next week" she will contact you. Don't do what she tells you to, she's going to take mega advantage of you. Put your phone down, go play 2K12.

 

man some of you guys have battle scars. i guess the older you get the less you worry about things like this. i used to go through the routine of holding a girl accountable to every little thing they say, (and never got any dates) until i just stopped worrying about. when i stopped worrying about i close 100 % of the time for AT LEAST the first date. i just subtlety make sure they are aware my time is valuable and that i can walk away any minute myself.

i read the situation the op's in much different. i believe this girl really likes him. he just has to make her laugh with humor, not be so available and he'll be money.

 

She was probably going out or boning another guy this whole time. Don't sweat it.