Im surprised no one has asked how long theyve been together...that makes a huge difference. If it's been a while and you're still dwelling on that then it's not going away.....just end it to save both of you alot of drama and problems... however if it's very recent, then it's possible you'll eventually grow to like her personality so much that her appearance "issues" will fade and seem minor compared to how great her personality is. and you know what, guys take a lot of crap for this, but sometimes there's certain things you just gotta have or not have. In my case, i need someone who's got nice feminine hips because anything else just isn't feminine to me and i'll dwell on it. So that's something that even a nice personality will fix. If that's the case with you, then end it too. Women do the same, some hate guys who have a lot of facial hair and don't care if everything else is perfect, yet there's a double standard, which labels guys as being jerks or too caught up in physicality when they admit they feel this way. You're young, you have time to find someone if this girl isn't the one.
If she isn't the one, drop it. If it doesn't feel right for you, move on. You don't want to spend the next however many years of your life regretting staying with her if you decide down the road that you don't really love her.
Dude, I just bolded some of the things you said that stood out to me. I come to the conclusion that its just you and you need to stop being so insecure. It feels like maybe you are having trouble committing to her seriously and I think you are trying to find some excuse to maybe get out of the relationship. The fact that you are doubting yourself because she is such a wonderful girl that you might not find again for a very long should tell you that you are just not ready to be committed. If I were you homie, I'd think about it long and hard before you make her crazy about you that a break up would mess her up. Don't do that to her if she doesn't deserve it. Take the next 2 weeks or so and evaluate what you really have and what you really want. Do you want to start settling down now, or do you just want to have fun and mess around? To me as of now it seems like you really don't know what the hell you want and that's fine because you are at an age where you still might want to mess around a little more but then you also want to have to start having a serious relationship. Personally man, I got with a girl like that 1 year and 9 months ago. I'm only 22 right now and at the beginning I was scared because I saw how much she was into me and I wasn't sure if I was ready to commit for that long. I eventually brought myself to evaluate the girl I had and I concluded that she was too good to just pass up for a good time. I never regretted my decision because she has turned out to be the girl I would like to marry. Perhaps I did settle out too early, but honestly it's been worth. So like I said bro, just think about it and really put her feelings in front of yours and think what is the best decision you can make. Don't be selfish and hurt her if she isn't that type of girl that deserves that.
If you truly love her, then you'd let her go. Because as a guy, physical attraction is huge. However you said she's pretty... and the only problem is boobs and ass? ass can be worked upon in the gym and boobs can be done with a little bit of $$. But like Phil Collins said, "If you love someone, you gotta learn to let them gooo..." "...when I dreaaaaaaaam about you..." ok disregard the last quite, I think I went too far.
Start with... I don't think we should see each other any more. then follow up with It's not you... it's me.
So long as it's not the face, it can be fixed easy. If she's skinny, tell her to eat more. Afaik, women's boobs grow when they're lactating.
You said "she would be perfect if she was sexier and had bigger boobs/ ass". So if you want bigger boobs and ass, then why not try to find it? Its kinda superficial, but not if its a burning desire. Would you like it if she said to herself "He's nice, except his penis isnt that big/his wallet isnt that big?". Do you think thats a personal standard that just goes away? Can you ever make up for that? I think you CAN develop love along the way if you're patient. But what'll happen is you'll love "her", but you'll still love big boobs and ass and ogle at curvy women on TV or in p*rn. My opinion, you have to TOTALLY compromise on the physical part if you really love her. No "yeah, but". You didnt mention anything else wrong with her, you only mentioned you wanted something in particular. Why not try for that particular?
El Pigto pretty much wrote the post I was getting ready to write. Everybody goes through these doubting stages. Recognize it for what it is and it is much easier to deal with. Your mind is playing tricks on you because the penis doesn't want to commit. Stick it out a little while longer, delve into some p*rn to satisfy those urges, and see if you don't come back around. You'll meet several women throughout your life that you could eventually marry, but if you're lucky, you'll meet The One. It's tough when you can't decide if the one you're with is The One or not and whether it is worth the gamble of letting her go to search for The One. Just be honest with yourself and make a good decision based on all the factors. Once you decide ...whichever way it might be... go for it and don't look back or question yourself. It will be the right decision at the time.
i missed this post and these two things jumped out at me... first, how long have you been together? this is your fired real relationship, so maybe you jumped to "love" too quickly and don't even really love her yet and you think you do. Like someone else pointed out, if you loved her, then boobs don't matter. Yes, that's very cliche, but when you truly love someone it's because you can overlook their faults in general or the thing you see as faults. If you can't get over it it's either because you really don't love her like you think you do, or because that "fault" is too important to you to overlook. It's a must have (like i mentioned in my previous post). nothing wrong with having some must haves. If that's the case then she's not the one. then the second thing shows your youth. As you get older you'll see and realize many girls who are pretty and good looking go from the typical good looking guys to the more "average" guys...now this isn't always the case, but the point is when you're young, for both sexes, appearance is rated very very high, so many girls go for the "models", only for many to realize later their personality and goals dont match with theirs and they stop focusing so much on the physical side, so don't think looks are always going to be the deciding factor. As women mature it changes. Same goes for guys, but i think the percentage is lower for them.
Hey dude, listen to ME. I'll tell you what to do. You have to think about what you want first though. If you want a REAL relationship...stay with her, it's best to be with a girl that likes YOU more than you like HER. Why? Cause that way, YOU don't suffer. You control everything. I know what's wrong with you cause it's happened to me before. I used to have this super hot girlfriend but she was a blonde, and I DON'T like blondes. I love brunettes, and for THAT simple reason I could never see her as that super hot girl she was. I dumped her after a while, and she was devastated. Cause we had a really good relationship, but I just wasn't attracted to her. I was constantly looking at other girls and longing to be single. I know it was superficial of me, but it was best for us to part ways. And if you're not happy with her, then just dump her dude...before you drag this on even longer and make things worse. You're still young, you'll find another girl guaranteed. It's just the way our brains work. You have something good, but you want something better. Sometimes you have to know when to settle with what you've got. So just think about that. I mean if she's a REALLY good girlfriend and she makes you a better man, then keep her. Trust me, it's hard to find a good woman these days. You'll learn a lot about relationships being with her so it will help you in the future, you know? Just make an educated decision, don't do anything rash...and you'll be fine.
This message made a point with the last statement, but the way to that point was a bunch of conflicting points, so really you could've just said the last sentence and it would have been more effective. I guess I'll point them out: You should stay with a girl who likes you more than you like her, followed with I dumped her because I like brunettes more Then: If you don't like her then just dump her you will find another girlfriend, followed by: stay with her it is hard to find a good girl these days.
Well if he's gonna use her cause she's a good girlfriend then he needs to know that it's not entirely a bad thing. I mean if he's THAT selfish like I was then screw it. But if he feels bad or if he rather be single then dump her. But there are pro's and con's to being in this situation.
I am just now looking at this thread it seems like this guy has posted something completely opposite of mine but anyways let's start this off. Bro your 22? Sweet you can buy me beer and we can go out one night and pick up chicks with nice boobs and ass and they will love you long time. Look you don't question love if you question your love for someone you obviously don't love the person. Plus I say just keep her around, if she qualifies to be a good **** buddy. Don't be to mushy dood show some balls haha.
Not only will the boobs and ass fade but so will the access. Sounds like you've got a p*rn-driven outlook on your self-analysis. In the long run, p*rn just gives you more things to regret not having after the p*rn is gone. I'll have to disagree with what others said: there is no The One. It's a big world and even if The One existed, how likely is it that you stumbled upon her? Relationships are more about a decision and a commitment. Obviously there is some kind of attraction that under-girds it all because we don't just pick someone out randomly and make it work... although we theoretically could! I watched this video series recently; you might find something there: http://www.laughyourway.com/video-library/Mens-Brains-vs-Womens-Brains/ My daughter got married this past weekend. The minister did a beautiful ceremony and part of his message was about communication in marriage: The Three Things We Need to Learn to Say and Mean 1. I love you 2. I'm sorry 3. I forgive you
#2 is definitely something very difficult to do. #1 and 3 not so much for me. Congratulations on your daughter's marriage.
