Guy from her old job. Some people from her work went out one night, he offered to drive, she met him at his place they went, they came back, she went inside instead of going home. She was working at HEB at this time. She works as an accountant for an oil and gas company now. We basically do the same job now, just for rival companies.
Exactly. Hard to hear, but if she TRULY loved AND respected you, she wouldn't have even put herself in the situation to cheat. The cheating part is just the physical end result. She chose to put herself in the situation and leave the door open to gain feelings for someone else, know and feel it happening and not stop it from continuing until it resulted in the physical act. Keep your head up man. I've been there... 7 year marriage ended because of this. It's a learning experience. If you're not married (especially if you have no kids), no need wasting your time, effort, emotions and love on someone who disregarded it all. You're worth more than that. It will be hard, but just move on and take time to find yourself for a while and let yourself "grieve" and get over her. It's time to better yourself. Learn to cook, hit the gym, do somethings YOU want to do that you've put off for a long time because you were in a relationship. Look in the mirror and become better for it. At some point, the right girl, who loves, respects and appreciates all of that will come along and it will all be worth it. And hey, people do make mistakes and I don't believe this stuff about "once does it, always does it". She could be the one. But time will tell, not now. Take care of yourself now and move on. If much later down the line she ends up back in your life, you've completely forgiven her, COMPLETELY can trust her and can forget the past; then it might have meant to be and might work. But, you have to be YOU now.
Maybe she would take the chance. People do stupid things. Once is a mistake. Twice is a pattern. The fact that she admitted to it, she at least feels guilty about lying to him. Somebody who didn't care could have lived with the guilt.
Seriously go out and put your anger to making yourself better. I was a chubby dude when my ex broke up with me, then i put then effort to become swoll like i am today.
fool me once... First girlfriend cheated on me, I forgave her. Did it a second time (so I did her best friend). Given, this was in high school, but still, not worth it. You'll always have that thought hanging over your head.
Get back with her. Tell her you love her no matter what. Buy her flowers, make her an old school mix tape. Tell her shes the one. Keep this up for one day. Then dump her. Go work out. Concentrate on career. Get back with her. Tell her shes the one. Buy her flowers, make her an old school mixtape. Keep this up for one day Then dump her.
let me get this straight. 1. she - affair in Feb (assume intoxication the main cause) - (bad) 2. she - talks about losing feeings - (good) 3. you - puts in extra effort - (good) 4. she - sees effort and comes clean 'bout affair - (good) 5. you - doing what you can to distance yourself - (???) It just seems like you both were trying until someone said that you shouldn't forgive. Okay...cool. You don't HAVE to forgive. But as an exbartender I've seen cheating. I've seen cheating completely destroy a marriage. I've seen cheating as a catalyst to a super relationship...not that that was the intent. Just make sure everything is on the table and try a little tenderness when trying to understand your next move. And I might add, forgiveness goes a hell of a long ass way.
My wife cheated on me about a month into the relationship, with her ex. We broke up and they started going out again. A few days passed, and she couldn't resist the D. I don't worry about her ever cheating again.
Very sorry to hear about that man. I don't really have any good advice but whatever you do don't rush into it.
What if + Perspective: She cheated on you with a Hot Chick, maybe experimental.. Would you forgive her?
OP didn't say the timing, but I GUARANTEE when she talked to him about losing feelings or things getting stale, she had already cheated (or was about to). Great to be open and communicate how you feel. But relationships go through ups and downs and stale phases, and even you lose a bit of that "in-love" feeling at times. If you really love and respect the person you're with, you stick through it and work through it... not cheat. She should have admitted it back then if she had already cheated or how she was feeling towards another man, NOT later down the line after he's done his part; putting his time, effort and heart into her and the relationship, only THEN telling him which only hurt him much more. He showed love and respect.. she did not.
