Glanville v Schilling fued continues. Schilling speaks!

http://espn.go.com/mlb/columns/stark_jayson/1208471.html

The heck with Curt Schilling and Ben Davis. That isn't even Schilling's longest-running "feud" of the week.

It's now three weeks since Phillies leadoff man Doug Glanville took him deep twice, handing Schilling his first loss of the season, and then said it all had to do with the day Schilling killed one of his men in the computer game, Everquest.

They've been cyber-haggling about this ever since, with Glanville complaining that Schilling's character, Cylc, abandoned him and allowed him to be slaughtered by a flock of mad birds. But this week, Schilling launched into his most detailed defense yet of his computerized actions that fateful day.

So Week in Review dutifully returns for another session of The Baseball People's Cyber-Court. Here goes.

The defense speaks

All right, Mr. Schilling. Your witness.

First off, Schilling said, his guy, Cylc, was so "honorable, noble and prideful," that no one had ever uttered one disparaging word about him until Glanville came along.

What happened to Glanville, Schilling claimed, was that he was a "newbie" -- which is an Everquest term for a rookie who is "prone to screw-ups -- and likely to get anyone hanging around him killed in the blink of an eye, through sheer stupidity."

So on the day in question, Schilling recalled, Cylc and Glanville's character, Billabong, were teaming up. And Cylc -- a gentle sort whose only job was to "help others and keep them alive" -- was merely "hanging back while Billabong goes off into the woods to kill a few birds."

"Douggie," Schilling contended, "runs this little fat dwarf (Billabong) out into the woods in search of fame, only to get pounced upon by a whole flock of ticked off birds. I see his health bar dropping faster than my batting average in May, and I know it's trouble. Death is pretty likely if we don't run now."

So Schilling admits he bailed, screaming the term, "Train." That's more Ever-speak -- for what Schilling described as "some young dope, a newbie, who goes running off full of testosterone, thinking he's gonna slay the world, only to come screaming by you five minutes later with 90 percent of the known monsters in the world chasing him down to skin him alive."

Once Glanville got himself into this mess, Schilling said, "the situation was hopeless, regardless of how much help we got." So Schilling opted to stay out of it -- knowing, he contended, that Glanville's character was a "paladin," a selfless type who is "supposed to lay his life down for his friends."

Schilling's recollection, therefore, is that Glanville's poor Billabong "became bird food due to his own reckless behavior, endangering the lives of all those that sought his protection."

What that means, Schilling claimed, was that he and Cylc should be "cleared of all slander" -- "and Doug should come forth and tell you the real reason he took me deep twice in one game, which is real simple:

"I threw eye-high fastballs to a high fastball hitter, and the jet stream at Bank One took them out. Period."


Phew. This is complicated stuff, especially to those of us who wouldn't know a paladin from a palimony suit. But not surprisingly, Glanville has a different memory of these events. So we'll bring him back to the stand for ...

The re-direct

A clearly disturbed Glanville used terms such as "crock" and "insanity" to describe Schilling's story. And apparently he didn't like it much, either.

For one thing, Glanville claimed, he'd already played the game long enough that he was no longer a "newbie." For another thing, he said, it was appropriate that Schilling's character be known as Cylc because "he silkily slides away whenever there's trouble."

Sure, being a "cleric" or a healer, Schilling's character had a great reputation as a good guy. But basically, Glanville contended, Cylc mostly hung around at the back of the pack, "never swung a blade and every once in a while just gave you a back massage. But that's about it."

And while Schilling may accuse his guy of being a "train," Glanville said it's ironic that, "in the Everquest world, Schill's nickname is actually 'Amtrak.' "

So when Schilling says he yelled, "train," Glanville testified, that was just "to give himself an alibi. He says he had to warn the others, but he neglects to tell you there were only two in our party -- he and I. So he just did that to give himself an out. By the time I knew I was in trouble, he was already chilling with the guards, having a couple of cocktails."

Meanwhile, there's one more thing Glanville claims that Schilling forgot to mention: "He was the one who said, 'Let's attack this bird.' "

So who was really being reckless here? That's what Glanville wonders.

"I was reckless in no way," he said. "My character was the one slain. His character was just chilling, having soup and salad with the guards."

So Schilling can chalk those home runs up to jet streams if he wants, Glanville said. But "Billabong needed to be avenged," because "I know the truth of the situation."

"Remember his nickname -- Amtrak," Glanville said. "Maybe that's what was going on. Those home-run balls symbolized the departure of a train. I was trying to show him what the meaning of 'train' really was. I think it's appropriate that he get traded now to the Houston Astros, where they actually have a train, so he can be among the trains he represents."

Glanville also vows that the next time these two meet, in Philadelphia in August, "it could be very interesting." Real Everquest characters may even be in the stands for that game, he hinted.

At this point, our court will adjourn. But will Schilling cross-examine? Stay tuned.

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[This message has been edited by Puedlfor (edited June 01, 2001).]