Believe what you want. Observe people you know with regard to relationships. It's no accident that nice guys finish last, and women are attracted to "jerks".
This rule applies less and less as people get older. Once people grow up, nice guys generally end up winning a lot more. But in your teens and twenties, it's the rule rather than the exception, which is pretty sad. Many times girls at that age have no idea what they want, so the jackass type somehow always ends up on top. Props to you if you find an exception to that rule.
Exactly. Methinks Burzmali's attitude towards women is one of the main reasons we have a 50% divorce rate in this country. Women think they want the "alpha male" when they're young and "dumb", but realize a few years into it that they made the wrong choice. Meanwhile, "alpha male" goes back to trying to score with college-age girls, buys sports car to make up for the fact that he's not good-looking anymore not to mention his microscopic penis, then dies at 48 of a heart-attack after having to pay his third set of child support payments. Or something.
http://msn.match.com/msn/article.as...ngID=516311&BannerID=544657&menuid=6>1=8233 This is for you rm.
Alpha male doesn't mean stupid jock, an alpha male is a man who is completely confident and in control. I happen to agree with everything that Nomar has said, and to the starter of the thread: you have ****ed up with this girl on multiple occaisons, especially when she is giving you the tests that Nomar talked about. You really cannot be apologetic and expect the girl to be attracted to you, especially not at this stage (only 5 month relationship.) Good luck dude, but I doubt you have a chance to get back with this girl.
I ****ed up by not being alpha enough? I just wanted her to see how much I loved her and hope that it would make her come back to me. If I acted non-chalant about the breakup, that would cause her to want to come back to me more?
maybe you guys were right... she hasn't called me in two days ever since I told her I would take her back if she wanted to. I'm starting to get over her a little bit, though it hurts bad whenever I think about our memories together. By the way, thanks for the link. The part where it says to think about all her negative attributes was good. I literally felt the pain leaving my body a little bit.
Call up some friends and go out drinking. When u see the pretty girl at the bar, act like some over-confident, cocky, arrogant ahole. Trust me - it works. Either that or go to the strip club.
Don't buy into this alpha male crap. Just be yourself; if that means wearing your emotions on your sleeve so be it. And if she hasn't called back, I doubt that's in response to your willing to give it another try. She just doesn't know what she wants or how she feels. Again, just move on with your life and find happiness with yourself. Once you do that, everything else will fall in line. And btw, I'm a nice guy and I most certainly haven't finished last... it really all depends on what type of girl you wanna bring home.
What did you want to do from her negative attributes before everything went sour? For her to change, or for you to slowly deal with it? The negatives depend on whether you make it an issue or whether she forces it into an issue.... Try to work them out whenever thoughts of her hits you. You can, then there's a struggle worth pursuing.
Dude... She broke up with you (basically) and you told her she could have you back if she wanted to? Then you actually expected her to have a change of heart and call you? Seriously, you need to move on. It's not an alpha-male thing. If the tables were turned, I would give her the exact same advice. It's not about telling you to be someone you're not. Be yourself, but don't waste your feelings and energy on someone who is not available. She's not available.
As others have said, just move on. It is hard as hell, but just don't spend any more time or effort on this. Do your own thing. She is stringing you along. She may doing it because she doesn't know what she wants, or she is doing it on purpose, or some subconcious ego stroking that she wants. Either way you are being strung along, and you don't deserve it. Her actions are inconsiderate. Even if in a perfect world you feel there would be some kind of connection and great times ahead, those actions let you know that she doesn't live in your perfect world. Just move on with your life, and know that it is ok to be sad about it, and wish it would have turned out differently for now. But don't invest any more into this.
Sometimes I feel like I can move on, sometimes I'm paralyzed with pain. Right now I'm in pain cuz I expect her to call me at this time of night. ahhh... I even called up some random girl I dated last year for advice, whose phone number I still had. She didn't pick up, then called back and was like "I got a phone call from this number... who are you?"
Totally agreed. That's because these older women you're talking about have been worn out by the alpha males and sown their wild oats so to speak. Now they are looking for stability in a relationship moreso than raw attraction. That's the real reason divorce rates are so high, because that doesn't necessarily work. To all that "don't buy" the alpha male "stuff", that's like saying you "don't buy" biology.
Don't expect anything from her. Don't expect a call, a letter, or anything else. In fact if you do expect something at a certain time from her, it would be a good idea to make sure you have plans away from your phone for that particular time. Then when you do get home don't even check your messages until the next day. It is just torturing yourself to keep looking for something that isn't there.
sadly non-chalance is the answer. #1, it'll help you get over it quicker since you aren't thinking about it and #2 a lot of girls get put off by the overly emotional pleas and calls that guys in your situation might put on. Trust us, every guy here has probably gone through what you are facing and the sad reality is that many times younger girls have no freaking idea what they want and are just absolutely confusing as hell. Don't even waste time trying to figure out why they want to breakup because many times you'll never really figure out why. Just move on and forget about it. It's tough and very painful but in the long run, I swear you'll look back and realize that you did the right thing by just walking away.
Wrong verb phrase. Correct one is verb will settled for. BTW, most women start wanting a non-gay version of Ken who has a job. As reality sets in, women will settle for much less. Carry on.
I can't convince you to believe me, but I assure you that you are wrong. Women are attracted to "jerks". You are deluded.
First and foremost I am going to tell you the exact same thing I told my Fiance's brother about internet dating: " the internet is for buying shoes not a wife." Now with that said, whatever floats your boat. It's reasonable to expect her to pick up the bill every now and then. In fact most girls would be insulted if you didn't let them help out. It's ok to lose your temper every now and then if you don't get violent. You can't be perfect all the time and if she expects you to be then you don't need her anyway. But it is never ok to spy on her, and it was spying, because its shows a lack of trust and respect on your part. Granted your fears were right but still its just wrong. If you did get back together you would both have to go a long way to restore trust. And please remember YOU NEVER GIVE A GIRL AN ULTIMATUM. It will not only totally piss her, and put the ball in her court, but it is almost sure to backfire. it's like turning the ball over woth :10 seconds left and you're down by two and its the last game of the finals and the other team scores. You lose. You wanna do everything you can to call the shots. I hope you two work it out, but realistically (sp?) it's probably over. So call her up tell her it's over, eat something and then go get wasted. It's much better than crying over spilled milk and she probably wasn't worth it anyway if she can't accept you for who you are.
For a rookie, you speak the truth. Best bet for you is to let her go. If she contacts you, then you can resume. But don't bother trying to contact her. It will just make you look like more of a tool.
