Oh my god, I just read an entire post by Nomar and agreed with it. Yes, but seriously, it seems like the big mistake with most relationships that start on the internet is that you don't really find out if you're on the same page with your feelings until you discover you're not and then people get hurt. The huge majority of them won't work out because one person is very serious about it and the other person was not in it for the long run. And...getting your feelings hurt sucks. Just keep tryin, and remember, if she doesn't feel the same way about you or if she has major problems with you early in the relationship, it's just not gonna work out. Now, me and moestavern...that's a match made in heaven.
thanks bro... I realize that I have to let her come to me and I cant force her to love me. However, I cant help but feel I lost the love of my life. Its a horrible feeling. I really regret that she never got to see my good side since I was dealing with lots of stress and working so much when we were together. I shouldn't have b****ed so much about work and I should have tried to be more charming and appreciative of her.
Everyone and I mean everyone goes through a crappy experience like this. You feel like everything is perfect and then bam, it just disappears. We all rationalize what happened, and we make excuses for ourselves and say that it's always our fault But the fact of the matter, is that it's hard to accept the fact that there was nothing you could do and that much of the problem is with the other person. Sure you might have been able to things differently, but there's no guarantee that would have made a difference and you'll just torture yourself forever if you keep focusing on that. It's always easier said than done when it comes to situations like this. And despite what everyone will tell you, you'll probably feel like crap for a while and that's ok. The best advice I can give you is to try to hang out with your friends and do things that you really enjoy. Just get out and do things that you enjoy and get your mind off of her. Things will only get worse if you keep focusing on it, as hard as that might be. Just cheer up, I'm sure you're a good guy and you just had a bad experience. Just take comfort in the fact that almost everyone has a crappy experience like that and that you probably learned what to and not to do. There are plenty of other fish in the sea. You made the decision that was best for you and in the long run, I'm sure you'll come to accept that you did the right thing.
No matter how bad you feel now, don't forget that you will feel better eventually. Time heals all wounds. New girls also help. I had the same feelings after a relationship didn't work out. I kept thinking about her even though I knew it was over. Then I met a new girl I like and I didn't really feel bad anymore. There are plenty of girls, the important thing is to not make the same mistakes you made in the previous relationship.
If you want her back, you HAVE TO APOLOGIZE !! Send her some flowers with a personal letter letting her know what an idiot you have been, but it was only because you thought that she was "The ONE !" That will either scare her off, or she will give you another chance. Your call. DD
Use the break to casually date other women. If you feel dishonest about it, go the extra step and tell your girl that you'll try to give her some distance while she thinks about it. Nothing serious, but that approach can sometimes tell you the reasons you're committed with your girl. It also gives you a chance to eat and take care of yourself and look at everything with less attachments.
Honestly it sounds like she found someone else. Don't tell her you haven't slept or eaten or any of that weak type of stuff. A woman wants a man, be man, tell her if she doesn't want to be with you then you will be fine, you understand and move on, start dating again, let her see that you are strong and ok and not a psycho who will go days without eating over a 5 month relationship. I'd be a little creeped out if a girl didn't eat or sleep or gave me an ultimatum if I said I was having second thought or needed some space after only 5 months of dating.
Sometime its hard when you love someone even when its short, I can sympathize with him. Wish relationships didn't have to be like this.
True, but when you factor in the fact that you've never met the person and really don't know anything about their emotional needs, problems are exacerbated.
I've been in longer relationships where I didn't feel nearly as bad at the end. Things went fast and serious in this one and I thought she was the one for me. As for being a man, I can bench 800 pounds and have a 21 inch penis.
So, she talked about moving in together and marriage but now says things moved way too fast. Classic. Sounds like she was in the moment when everything was new and "magical" and then, when things started coming back down to earth again, she got scared or thought that maybe you weren't the man she really wanted. Like others have said (and I can say from some past experiences unfortunately), you have to make her think "Oh well, your loss. I can just go find someone else as well." But, the fact that you have strong feelings for her and want her back, you have to play it cool. Find something really sentimental. You said y'all went on a vacation together, where did y'all go and was there anything that would instantly make her remember what a great time you had together? Nothing TOO obvious, something that comes off like you REALLY listen to her. But, something small. Mail it to her (NO, do not give it to her personally or drop if off at her front door). Just leave a small, hand-written message saying, "If you want to continue to make great memories, you know where to find me. Otherwise, thanks for the times we shared together." That's it. Unfortunately for you, the ball is in her court no matter what you do, so don't make it worse by "begging" for her to make a decision right away. Give her what I said above, and just move on, try to live your life as normal and as single as you can and try to forget about her. I know it's hard, I've been there, but nothing but good will come of it. Either she will come back to you, apologetic and sincere about being with you cause she realized what she gave away; or you will find someone else who is much, much better (even though it's hard to believe right now). I feel for you, but keep your head high and your chest out, and the right girl will find you.
You are dealing with one-itis. It's probably what screwed up the relationship in the first place. She's not the love of your life. There is no such thing. Go out and have sex with a hotter woman. You won't be thinking about her anymore.
Terrible advice. There is nothing the OP can do to "get her back", except maybe be seen with other women creating jealousy. But that's not really worth it. This ship has sailed, move on.
