Getting more comfortable with talking on the phone?

Practice is the best thing. I used to get so nervous and now I don't think about it.

- Buy some conversation books. Conversation is a skill, and as you learn more you will become less anxious
- A good tip I learned is to write down a list of stuff to ask her and talk about. This is pretty good even just for your friends and family.
- Don't feel the need to be super witty or a master story teller. That's not what conversation is really about!

 

It's pretty simple man. It's just like anything. The more you do it, the more comfortable you'll get.

 

...the hell are you? 12 yrs old or something?

 

You don't have to go through every item robotically. Ask stuff you are really ineterested in or the other person cares about, then you will remember. Also, it's just a helpful aid- hopefully one thing on the list leads to OTHER things to talk about.

Focus on what the other person is saying, dont worry about what you should say next. Then it will be more natural.

 

JANE: Oh I'm going uptown too, you wanna split a cab?

KRAMER: What about the driver?

 

You don't need to segue between topics if it is a lull in the conversation. Just think of how your conversations go with your friends: you may stay on one topic for a while, or branch off of it into related topics, but then when you switch onto an entirely different topic there is no segue into it; you just bring it up.

 

If you have money to burn, I have this 1800 number you can try out. Kinda related to what you're aiming for...

 

Practice here: 1 (800) 300-0300

Use code: 4829

Good luck

 

I'm not so good at calling a new girl whom I just met neither. I usually send them a text message first and see if they respond back.

I just feel weird about calling a girl after meeting her the night before. I don't want to come on too strong.

So how long do you guys wait after meeting someone at a bar before calling / texting?

 

All I can tell you is that I had the EXACT same problem, but I got over it by calling random stores and asking the clerk a question off the top of my head. You HAVE to call random stores alot, for practice, and just let your cool side breathe. Just drop some confidence on em, then hit em up like "uhhh.. does it come in irregular?" She'll be trapped into conversation. She won't know what hit her.

This practicing is a must. Please post scripts of your practice here for critiquing, you can beat this man!

 

My priceless advice though I have these afflictions worse than anybody.
If its about anxiety in general:
Definitely any kind of learning through constant repetition helps. Immerse yourself in lots of encouraging self help literature.

Except dont get too carried away and be the one guy on the dance floor dancing all by himself or trying to dance with every girl. Its a process, not a "break out". Start small and work your way up. Do many different things. Comes across more natural if you're more well-rounded. Plus the more things you do, the more you experience and the more you have to talk about.

If its about minimal approach:
Just ask questions and listen. And keep listening happily. And dont let on too much about yourself. It'll look like you're cool, collected and in control. And she'll possibly open up subjects to talk about. Dont babble on and on like a B***** save that crap for her, thats her role

Or just act like the girl is your sister or cousin or mom. Talk to them like family (except dont think of mom or sis when its time to close the deal you sicko ) Hell talk to them like a dude. I think some girls liked to be talked AT as much as talked TO, as long as they have some receptive attention directed at them that isnt too threatening or creepy.

Of course its the reason this thread was made in the first place, but as long as you're comfortable with whats coming out of your mouth, the other person will get comfortable to. If you play to your strengths you'll feel better

 

Anyone else want to take this? I haven't had my morning coffee yet.

moe? King Cheetah?

 

I think this guy was afraid of the phone, too.