dude.... a chick knows in the first 30 seconds whether or not she'd kiss/date/screw you, so you might as well make a move. In fact, the longer you spend beating around the bush, the worse your chances will be. Make a move. Lean in to her. If she leans toward you like she's ready for some kissing, go get it. If she leans back, avoiding you... well, then, hooray! you' don't have to worry about dating that chick any more! Don't wait for the perfect moment. Sure you could try setting up a gazebo on a lake with swans swimming and violins playing, but this ain't The Sound of Music.
Yeah, it's old, and it's soft. Isn't alcohol always involved, unless your first kiss is at an AA meeting?
Some of us would actually prefer to take things slow and not kiss someone for a while. It doesn't mean we won't ever want to; it just means that it takes a while to feel comfortable, and our desire to kiss them may be based on how well we know and care for them instead of just initial physical attraction. (but apparently I'm the only one in the universe who actually thinks this way, so I'm prepared to be single the rest of my life now)
Strangely....it wasnt a date. She was friends with my girlfriend at the time, we were all tweaked on on X, and my girlfriend thought that I should make out with her friend for a bit. This is not the story I am going to tell my kids.
I had to kiss my future wife on stage in a play before I really even knew her. We were pretty good at it by our first "real" date.
You don't need to be alone. But you do have to build comfort. You can't just go in when you just have attraction. You will get buyer's remorse. Go to a comfort location. Even if it's just standing in a different spot in the same room. Attraction 30 min Comfort - 4-7 hours, may be split over several meetings Seduction -1-2 hours In comfort, you can do a lot of things that build intimacy and move attention naturally toward stroking, petting and kissing. Kissing is a comfort behavior, btw, not a seduction move, so treat it as that while you escalate with appropriate breaks. Remember, she wants this. This is her fantasy. You are giving her the comfort she needs to allow herself to believe it "just happened", ( you can thus avoid her ASD, resistance, regret). The classic script from Mystery is, once you are in comfort, in intimate space and speaking slowly, touching each other, to ask, "do you want to kiss me"? She answers "yes, no, maybe, I don't know, or not here". Yes means yes - go in, be soft, rub noses, smile. No means no. You now have a friend, who can help you, if not a potential lover. Try to make her a pivot. Tell her you're looking for that person you can go there with and see what she knows about how to get "her". She might help you, right there, with some coaching. "Maybe" means "yes" - say "let's find out." Kiss her. Make it nice. "I don't know" means "yes", but she needs more comfort. Say, "I understand", pause, build anticipation, then "let's find out". Kiss her. "Not here" - self -explanatory. "I understand", switch locations, non-verbal comfort, put her against the wall, give her what she wants. There's also Style's evolution phase-shift, or Swinggcat's push/pull, where you are pulling her in close on a role playing and then pushing her away on a false barrier, then pulling her in again, etc, until she is chasing for more of you, then you "reward" her. Oh, for that good location, take her to Marfreless for a drink and chat.
was awkward...we were very close friends for a long time....and it was weird taking that step. but it got lots better! we've been married going on 9 years.
Mrs. Giddy and I had our first date at an upscale eatery across from the college campus that I attended. After dinner, we walked across the street to the campus and ambled around. We ended up down by the lake where we sat on the grass and talked and, hell yes, I kissed her. We were both freezing our asses off but didn't want to leave...
yea the whole "lean-in" strategy worked for me without me even knowing, i leaned in to say something stupid and she leaned back to kiss me. There was a quick moment of confusion, since we tended to joke and play around alot so i was like um.....is she playin around or wut.. but of course i wasnt going to ask. i just laid back and enjoyed the kiss. we have been togther ever since, going on 4 1/2 years.
Don't be so hung up on timelines. My current girlfriend and I went all the way after our first date and have been together for two years.
