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Female Roommate Advice

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by Downtown Sniper, Aug 25, 2014.

  1. droopy421

    droopy421 Member

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    We had a girl move into our 4 bedroom apartment. She was fine, renewed the lease and everything, my 3rd lease there. Then shortly after, my roommate buddy knocked her up. I moved out two weeks before the due date. It was a living hell.
     
  2. sammy

    sammy Contributing Member

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    She wants her cake and to eat it too.

    She seems like a lotta guys actually. Be glad that you were shown a big red flag before more feelings were involved. Learn how to cook well. You don't need a girl for that.
     
  3. danoman

    danoman Contributing Member

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    She's probably upset about something (who knows it could be anything).

    First, break the tension. Give her or use something funny a small object or something what ever you can think of to try to make her smile.

    Afterwards just tell her you noticed she was looking down or some thing like that. If she doesnt tell you thats ok. She will at least notice you showed interest.
     
    #63 danoman, Aug 26, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2014
  4. HR Dept

    HR Dept Contributing Member

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    Here's what I'd do. Fix it and allow yourself to be put into the friendzone. Then f**k your way out again. Rinse and repeat.
     
  5. ynelilvs99

    ynelilvs99 Member

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    Alright I'll help u out .. She was interested in hooking up with u but isn't anymore. Which is frankly a good thing. The best thing to do is get her to see u as a friend. U have a life and don't need this chick trying to manipulate u/ pull your strings.. Trust me. Act normal, hang out with her when the other chick is around, ask for girl advice, just anything that will make it clear they are both friends only. She will get over it and soon come around.
    Btw she's young, did u really expect her to be mature?? Asking a lot. Keep living your life, you will be alright with or without her friendship.
     
  6. Xerobull

    Xerobull You son of a b!tch! I'm in!

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    Don't **** where you eat.
     
  7. SwoLy-D

    SwoLy-D Contributing Member

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    DEAR LORD, y'all youngsters don't understand that women do things to get a reaction. AND you're giving it to them....
    DO you absolutely and positively have proof or know she did this?!?!? If no, then don't think it's a double standard. It's her bragging to you to see your reaction. You were cool with it or didn't pay any attention... so now she's getting your attention with this petty reason of you being a guy who wants to have sex with a girl.
    Do you absolutely have to have alcohol or coffee or tea? You can just have WATER at Starbucks, too. "A drink" also means water. Try water... but the point of going out isn't to drink, it's to talk alone.

    DON'T MENTION your girlfriend or F#($&ing other girls. Obviously this pissed her off. If you want to remain as friends, don't do things that you know will piss her off again.
    In Spanish we have a saying, "verbo mata carita"... which means that even the ugliest of mother effers can get chicks to go with them if they have the right words for them (whether it be lies or truth)... see Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett, or Christina Hendricks and that other guy... Mrs. SwoLy and me... etc.
    Don't ignore her. In one hand: she's your roommate. On the other hand: she's a potential lover. Either way, you can win with BOTH.

    I believe that you're madly in love with this girl, and she's UNATTAINABLE and a CHALLENGE to you as a male by virtue of her setting "her boundaries" out loud to you... so she's poking the bear to see what happens. Unfortunately, if you thought you had a chance and wanted to get with her, that was the chance and she openly wanted you to challenge that chance. Now, you've gone to challenge other things, like her ego, and she doesn't like it.

    If you don't believe you're in love with her, and want to keep it as roommates who hang out and don't have sex, still ask her out to talk. Let her be the first one to bring up the guys she's gone out with. But don't confront her about things... you're not the boss of her.

    In regards to her making your lunch or breakfast... just say: "I wished you could make me breakfast or lunch again... like before... but I am not sure why you stopped." And that could be another conversation starter. It doesn't always have to be a question.

    You don't have to do what I tell you... heck, most people here don't think like I do. I wished I didn't have to give y'all youngsters advice. Do well. Good luck. :cool:
     
  8. hooroo

    hooroo Member

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    she could've seen you as the safe "virginal" type but once that image got shattered she no longer wants to mother you.
     
  9. bejezuz

    bejezuz Contributing Member

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    You did something she didn't like. It's impossible to tell what it is without more information. She may be jealous or she may just have not been prepared for the possibility that you'd bring strange tail into her house. Either way, until it bothers her enough to confront you, I'd let it ride. Monitor the situation for escalating passive aggression or craziness and wait for the truth to come out.

    The same thing can happen with all-female roommates just as easily. When I started dating my wife, it caused problems with her roommates, because they were single and it made them feel inadequate. Eventually, the two roommates found dudes and it all evened out.
     
  10. macalu

    macalu Contributing Member

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    she may or may not have liked you. but as soon as you introduced a third party she became "self aware" *cue T2 theme*. this other person is threatening your relationship (whatever that is) with the roommate and she's ignoring you as a defense mechanism. she's hurt. she's jealous. and she doesn't know why. mostly likely because you're seen as someone with value now and you're paying attention to someone else.
     
  11. tonyt8605

    tonyt8605 Member

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    I personally think that when she said she had a "work boyfriend", she was talking about you.

    I also agree with everything Slowly-D said
     
  12. DaDakota

    DaDakota If you want to know, just ask!

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    This is what I thought when I read it too.

    DD
     
  13. fadeaway

    fadeaway Contributing Member

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    This thread is useless without pics.
     
  14. RedRedemption

    RedRedemption Contributing Member

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    Why do women do this crap?
     
  15. tonyt8605

    tonyt8605 Member

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    I know, right! Well they think we are mind readers for one. Also a lot of them think their relationships or potential relationships are gonna play out like it does in the movies and books. So they hold on to hope waiting for it to happen
     
  16. Haymitch

    Haymitch Custom Title
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  17. Mac#5

    Mac#5 Member

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    Wheres antec? Im sure he can dig up some pics :grin:
     
  18. Downtown Sniper

    Downtown Sniper Contributing Member

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    No pics you crazies!

    So fast forward the past couple of days.

    She let it be known that it is her time of the month, but apart from that talking to her has been pretty awkward because of how cold she is/barely talking (to me at least, still talks and laughs with the other female roommate)

    All her actions the past week has definitely put me off any thoughts I previously had of being attracted to her. So I figured I'm going to solidify myself in the friendzone - willingly - and hopefully get things back to how they were and make the place cool to live in.

    Previously, she brought flowers home and said a throwaway statement "look how lame I am, I have to buy myself flowers because no one else will"

    What better way to prove I'm a friend than by making a joke about that and sending her flowers at work (not expensive ones)

    I went with the idea that it was 'that time of the month' which is why she's annoyed - and not me bringing a girl home. So I said on the card I hope the flowers cheer you up as I've noticed you've been a little down the past few days.

    I get an email from her "hey there! Just got your flowers. haha thanks but what the hell!?"

    Get home from work and all she says is hello. The two roommates soon leave for yoga and I am in bed by the time they get home.

    Personally, I think trying to be a good friend and cheering her up would've brought about more than a thanks in an email. And I'm now annoyed at myself for even going that far.

    So now I'm over it. If she's going to try and give me the cold shoulder so be it. I can't be feeling bad about anything i've done. I will continue to bring people home if the situation arises, I'm not going to walk around on egg shells considering I live there and pay rent just as much as they do. Is this a selfish attitude to have?

    For crying out loud we're just roommates. Why has this blown way out of proportion.
     
  19. RunninRaven

    RunninRaven Contributing Member
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    Not sure I would have gone with flowers to try to put yourself in the friendzone. To me that is as much a mixed signal to her as her crap was to you.
     
  20. Rox11

    Rox11 Member

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    Not a bad move, but I would have went with the statement conversation starter and not a question. I thought the objective was to either try to be fwb or ignore her completely...
    You didn't listen to clutch advice and will be stuck my man.
     

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