Yes, and yes, and more yes. In fact, I am going to go get a spanking right now; I have been a naughty boy. Mamma's got some business to take care of.
I voted "yes." Like most Mexican old-fashioned peeps, I think there needs to be a bit of this everywhere. There's a GOOD BIG THICK *SS line between spanking your kids and abusing your kids. It should never get to the latter, ever. But, show them good discipline, respect and a bit of dignity and honor from the beginning, and you will never even have to do the former. There's a certain age and maturity level from your kids at which spanking will not work anymore if you let it get that far. Raise your children properly.
Yes...but only in extreme cases. I've done it to my children but only a couple of times. I don't see it as a way to toughen them up. Strictly as a punishment and to set boundaries, as others have said. Plus, like rockbox said, just knowing I will has been a deterrent on a few occasions. Also, my wife and I will be the only ones that ever lay a hand on my kids. No teacher or school admin will be permitted...if that's something they even still do.
Things are about proper moderation and application Some people cannot tell the difference between a spanking and a beating nor can they tell the difference between being stern and yelling nuances but significant ones Rocket River
Every family situation is different. I received good old fashioned whippings from my mother, my sister hardly ever. Parents were seperated so as the sole authority figure in house she had to go above and beyond to install RESPECT and discipline raising a young man. I was highly cautious of sassing or disrespecting her or other adults. She had no problems walking right in the middle of a bad crowd and snatching me out. My father only whipped me once, and I deserved it. It all worked out fine.
^ I agree with this. If the type or method in which corporal punishment would be given is clearly defined, like for example saying that "corporal punishment will be given in the form of paddling", would you be OK with it existing in public schools? I would.
Funny this topic is brought up here. My coworkers and I were just discussing spanking. My managers being a little older said they were paddled in school and they also let their children be paddled in school as well. I for one will not let another person touch my child. Although I do believe that it is at times necessary to spank the child. I don't use a belt, vacuum cord, brooms, or hangers the way my mom (beat me) but I will use an open palm and give him a couple of smacks on the butt. Nothing jarring just enough to get his attention. Whooping can definitely help a child get his act together but taking it over the top and beating them is a different story all together.
FLASH21, will you read my post (#26 in this thread) and answer it? I think it seems rather vague to just say "wouldn't allow anyone else to touch my child" (I wouldn't either), as compared to clearly defining the method the punishment would be given.
Yes to a certain age. I was spanked and yelled at till the age of 16. My mom will get all in my face and I never raised a hand. I moved out at 17 and never looked back. Now she is the sweetest thing, my 9yr brother has never got spanked.
A qualified yes. I think it can be used effectively, but it's also very easy to let it become ineffective and abusive. I'll spank my kids on occassion, but it comes with a lot of talking -- plenty of prior warning, explanation of why it's being done, and lots of affection too. We'll see when they're grown up if it was all a huge mistake anyway. But, there have been times when I've given a spanking and regretted it later -- that I was too emotional, or unfair, or otherwise didn't follow my proper procedure. So, I'm mostly hesitant to deal spankings. The warnings usually suffice anyway. Also, aside from not spanking too young, I don't think it's appropriate to spank too old. I think it's something for around 3 to 6 years old. My 6 and 9 year olds are past that stage. Maybe a 6 year old boy would still be too mule-headed, but the girl is smart enough now. My 4-year-olds though... sometimes there's nothing else to be done with them. Also, I've tried other sorts of non-corporal punishments like timeouts and displeasure that seem to be worse, especially for my 2 most extroverted kids. I've had them ask to have spankings instead of timeouts because they feels so traumatic to them. Probably everyone else would say the same, but I trust myself to do spankings in a thoughtful, non-abusive and constructive way, but have no trust in the general public to be able to do it. I'm not surprised that statistical studies would show negative outcomes in general. So, my qualification is, if you do it, think very hard about when and how you do it and how your kids will perceive it, and take great care.
it's all good mayn. I'd like to think that because of it, one day i'll be a better father than my mother was to me. never will I belittle my children, or demean their self-esteem to a point where they might hurt themselves.
I'm not. Tell me what my child did and I will handle the punishment...if it was something bad enough to warrant that.
I believe that if anyone decides when, where, and how my child should be spanked it should be my wife and I. There is no reason I should have to give the authority to another adult to spank, paddle, or swat my child if I am performing my job as a parent to correctly discipline and instill values into my child(ren). From what I've hear personally, in most cases, the corporal punishment administered by schools typically doesn't work. In fact! One of my coworkers signified it as being a form of right of passage between he and his friends. So it's more of a spectacle to some then an actual punishment. Therefore in my belief I should be able to mediate the issues with accountability, between myself, my kids, and their teachers. Not by allowing them to inflict physical pain on my child.
very true. unfortunately in my case it was not so much sternness as it was yelling. got to the point that by the time I was in 7th grade, I slit both my wrists, and my parents admitted to a psych ward. it's crazy just how much verbal influence can have on a kid, especially when they're hitting puberty and their minds and going all which way and not. I'm 26 years old, now, and about 15 years removed from that incident. I'm a very happy person, and would never fathom of doing such a thing, now. still though, would have much rather have been spanked, than yelled at.
Perfectly stated. This is usually the same way I approach handing out spankings in my household. Usually my son reacts more to the scold on my face than the hand out targeted towards his rear end. Their emotions are the worse thing you can attack so typically I try to make them feel remorseful for what they've done before I take to spanking them.
