did i pass my drug test?

This.

If I were you, I would book a one way ticket to Mexico using Malaysia Airlines.

 

I think the only thing you have to worry about it is if they can smell it through your urine. Some people have been known to have a very strong sense of smell and even taste drugs through urine.

TBH.

 

A polygraph is a machine that purportedly determines if you are telling the truth. A lie detector, as seen on TV.

 

Paranoia and laughter are symptoms of smoking weed.

 

THEY KNOW.

 

Good luck with your career choice. What MOS did you select? With the military down sizing considerably this year, the desirable jobs out there have dwindled.

 

Was the pipe made of metal, glass, or plaster?

This is important.

 

Yeah, they are going to get you later on the polygraph, if you lied about never smoking before. That question was a trap. They are getting sneaky, smart now in the Army, and have a surplus of polygraphs to use on our own now that we're moving out of Afghanistan.

 

In 1989 I passed a drug test I took the morning after an Allman Brothers concert in The Summit.

 

"If a law is unjust, a man is not only right to disobey it, he is obligated to do so."
-Benjamin Franklin

 

Wait, the military? Not President, not Doctor, not Astronaut - the military? What are they gonna do, spank you if you come up positive? ****, just keep on smoking dude.

 

You passed, but the NSA and homeland security now know the truth about your sordid ways.