Biggest size difference between husband and wife

If you use melted brownie mix it looks like poop.

 

What makes you think that I didn't already know that, huh?

Meh. I'll just blame it on the little nephew. Kids say the darndest things. Just hope the kids dad isn't arrested. That'd be awkward.

 

We should pay nurses a whole lot more than we do now then. They do that every single day.

 

Yeah, but they get free morphine.