Label it however you want, but it is essentially the same thing as not allowing a child to go to another's house because they are of different races, creeds, culture, etc. The same arguments were routinely used 50 years ago for those things (racial "mixing", anti-sematic, anti-Catholic, many others in more homogeneous places). It is the perogotive of the parent to do such a thing, but I certainly hope it isn't publically supported. For me, as long as I think the environment is safe in another's household, I'd let my children go there to hang out with their children. Another side, on the child adoption thing, the whole issue of exclusion because same sex coulpes can't "naturally" procreate is silly in this day and age. In fact a great many adopting couples do so because they never have been able to procreate and many have had intensive medical intervention w/o success. Should they be excluded for adoption because they are not fertile? Of course not. One can also argue that placement in a same sex household would be stigmatizing for the child. But again, that is the same kind of argument against placing a child in another ethnic/racial groups home--and though I know it is used, I think it is a terrible argument.
I have a 10 year old and a 7 year old jackhole and I don't lie to my kids. You just don't have the balls to explain your prejudicial views to your kids.
It is one thing to explain to a child why people are of different races, religions or creeds. There are ways to explain such things to a child. There is no way, without bringing sexuality into it, to explain to a child why so and so has two dads. It isn't so much an issue of being against homosexuality as it is not wanting to put your child into a situation where questions about sex will arise when you do not believe that YOUR child is ready to learn about any issues involving sex. It is an issue of knowing YOUR child. Knowing when they are mature enough to have the discussion about sex. Knowing whether it is wise for YOUR child to be in a situation that lends itself to these questions arising.
Why can't kids learn about sex? It isn't horrible and it shouldn't be taboo. People from other country's do not have the ridiculous taboo on sex and their kids are just fine, perhaps even more adjusted than our own (US) children.
I'm not saying whether kids should or should not. Deciding when YOUR kid is ready is the right belonging to the parents of the child. I personally have no kids. I'm not going to tell somebody what is and what is not right for their child. IMO...neither should you.
It doesn't at all have to be about sex. Who knows if they have sex at all (some couple of all combinations don't) and I seriously doubt a 6 year old seeing any couple is thinking of them in terms of what they do naked with each other. Just explain it as two men who have chosen to live and share their life together. I don't think it is that much harder to explain than....they don't believe in Jesus...they don't believe in eating ....food because of their religion. Children are also very perseptive of how people look. Would it be OK to avoid a child/family because they look different (race/ethic/burn victum) or in a wheelchair? And some people have the "opinion" other of different creed/races/cultures being inherently inferior. Doesn't mean it that opinion isn't worthy of being critized if brought up expressed publically.
Many people today are confused and don't understand the difference between morality and culture. Today tolerance=morality- that is wrong by definition No matter what your choice, you are thinking of what is the highest good for your little girl. I commend you. You will not damage your daughter or your neighbors by your decision. Based upon the attitude you have taken in this thread I am sure this will all work out for good. One thing you have shown, you are no bigot.
I have two kids. And if anther parent asks for opinions on whether it is reasonable to exclude their child from going to a children's party solely because the hosts are a different ethnic, racial, creed, sexual identity/orientation, class, culture, etc, I am going to say no it isn't. The only red flag for me would be an unsafe environment, and by all means most parents are welcome to come themselves to most such events if they have any doubt.
This is just silly. Explaining why a kid has two parents of the same gender is bound to bring up questions of this sort. To deny that it will just shows that you do not understand how inquisitive kids may be. Before you start on this reply...kids often ask questions that they may not be mature enough to fully understand the answer. Most parents believe that it is better to avoid those questions until such time as their child is mature enough to understand the answer. It is a parent's right to do so and it has more to do with knowing your child and what they are ready to understand than it is about political ideology.
What is to explain? Two people love each other and live together. If they ask about the kid all you have to say is that they could have had a kid from a prior relationship or adoption. People have kids from prior relationships all the time. Why is this situation any different?
I have 2 young kids and I know exactly how inquisitive they are and how much they do perceive. I'll reiterate.... "Just explain it as two men who have chosen to live and share their life together". That would not be confusing to my 3.5 year old. and is probably eaier/less unsettling than many other sources of diversity. I am pretty sure what they might be doing naked and in bed would not be on his mind--no more than if he sees his neighbor's friends (opposite sex) parents and thinks, I wonder what they do in bed. The whole fallacy is trying to reduce the thing to physical sexual relations. Nobody knows what any couple is doing in their bed room unless they share it, and I hope none of them do it in the presence of young kids, heterosexual or not.
Would you take your kid to the home of a divorced parent, or a unmarried parent with a live-in partner of the opposite sex? If so, what's the difference? -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I like this review on amazon from the book basso posted: This book was a gift to my daughter and I from my stepsister, as much as a testament to her acceptance of me as her sister, as her acceptance of my daughter, who was adopted, as her niece. She couldn't have given us a better gift. But I have to be completely honest and say that, had I come across this book in the store, I would not have bought it. In fact the first time I read it to my daughter, I wanted to skim past the "some families have two moms or two dads" page. I know my saying that might be hurtful for some, and I am truly, truly sorry. Well, I didn't skim past that page. I read it to my daughter. Again, and again, and again because guess what: this is her favorite book. And though she's 18 mos old, she understands what is going on. She loves to wipe her hand across the "Some families like to be clean" page and she turns to hug me on the "All families like to hug" page. She places her finger to her mouth to shush when I say, "Some families like to be quiet." I didn't teach her to do these things as we read along; this book just really engages her. Some day she'll look at me quizzically and ask how it is that some people have two moms or two dads, and I'm going to tell her why: they just do. Like the other reviewer, I will admit that I had no intention of introducing my daughter to homosexuality at such a young age. Because, I was thinking about the sexuality part, not the love part. And the more I read this book to to her over and over and over, I am learning that when she has friends who have same gender parents, that is what I want her to focus on, the love part, because that's what she thinks about when she sees her own mommy and daddy, nothing else. We became a family without any of that. Oh, and the other huge thing about this book. It is how I taught my daughter about the word "adopt." I have other books to try to explain to her about how we became a family, but she literally pushes them away. This is the only one that holds her attention. I'll say, "some families, like you and mommy and daddy, adopt children" and she just beams. Of course, the page has ducks on it, and I strongly suspect she's saying, "a duck!" at least half the time because she then goes, "quack, quack, quack." http://www.amazon.com/Family-Book-T...8882425?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1192214346&sr=8-1
You know your kids and the original poster in this thread knows his kids. What is ok for your kids may not be ok for his. All kids mature differently. I respect his right to decide what is right for his kids.
How is teaching someone that a family loves each other wrong for anyone of any age? How is shunning an innocent kid and make them feel like they are not normal right for any one of any age?
What I find offensive about this whole issue is that some upper/middle-class white dudes/dudettes all over the internet are trying to pass their "persecution" off as the same as the persecution faced by blacks in the Jim Crow era. That's laughable at best, downright insulting at worst.
There are definte similarities. They are denied certain rights, publically shunned, ridiclued, and discriminated against. They are physically attacked and beaten by prejudiced groups and hostile bigots much the same. So there are definite similarities and definite differences. But any discrimination shouldn't be tolerated. What I find offensive is that people would be more upset at comparing who's discrimination was worse than actually combating the discrimination.
