AshleyMadison.com, a site for people looking to have affairs

Is adultery a crime?

 

If you cheat on someone, or someone cheats on you, no matter what mechanism was used to cheat (or how easy/difficult the opportunity to cheat was made) chances are you were not a good fit for marriage anyway.

Don't hate the player, hate the game.

 

Good luck with that.

To paraphrase popular saying.

"Websites don't cheat on people, people cheat on people."

 

Cause and Effect

SINCE the stigma of Adultery has been severely lessened and almost gone
the amount of Adultery has increased

when you make a society where anything goes. . . . .
then EVERYTHING REALLY DOES GO . .

Rocket River

 

This is the second time in only a few days where you've posted something blaming people's behavior on society as a whole (the murderer children in D&D was the other). Again, I have to disagree with you. I really doubt there is any evidence to suggest that adultery is more prevalent today than it has been in the past. As for the stigma being lessened, I think the opposite is true. It used to be that men would very openly have mistresses and their wives could do nothing about it. Those days are gone.

 

I'm not sure about that. I think people and society just were not open about a lot of things back then. I remember reading that toilet paper commercials now would be obscene back in the day even though people still used it. Same thing really.

 

We are: What society makes us.
We do: What society allows us to do.

Are you honestly telling me that Adultery is no more prevelant today than it was 50 yrs ago? That it is about the same?

I seriously doubt that.

I don't beleive people are born to certain behaviors
I beleive people are taught through societal norms etc

Rocket River

 

Incorrect.

People have cheated since the concept of monogamy was invented.

The only thing that has changed is the divorce rate.

 

So, according to the site's founder...

If you are unhappy in your marriage, you fix it by having a secret affair. Brilliant!

I'm sorry, it's a weak argument but typical of our society's attitude these days... if it's broke, get a new one.

What about actually opening your mouth, talking to and working on the issues with the person you more than likely originally deemed as the love of your life and someone you could share your most intimate thoughts with?

Like Moe said, there are much more emotional issues and consequences that go into an affair than just hopping into a bed with someone for a half hour. It turns into a real addiction for that person, much like being hooked on drugs. No matter how much deep down they know it's not right, they can;t get enough of that "high".

Unfortunately, I know this all too personally as my eight year marriage ended with my wife having an affair which turned into a secret relationship. It just doesn't start and end with sleeping with someone once or twice. Believe me.

And, I also don't buy this crap about we're animals and monogamy is unnatural. Again, I think that's a cop out. There is a reason we are the dominant species on this planet. Because we use our brains and not JUST act on instincts. Besides, just as many (or more) people in this world have morals and the capability to be loyal to someone they love - people who look at a normal rough patch in a marriage as a way to build a relationship rather than an excuse to say it's broken and run elsewhere.

If you go out and cheat, whether the relationship is rocky or not, that's on YOU, not on the evolution of man and the progress of society, technology and how we communicate with each other. Stop blaming everyone and everything else for YOUR actions.

 

Isn't society for the most part against adultery, adult-children relationships, beastiality, and a host of other things. Yet all of these things have organizations, websites, etc. that advocate them. Is it more prevalent today? Maybe, but how do we know when such subjects were so taboo years ago. The truth is we don't know. What we do know is that it is easier to talk about such subjects and get those things now especially with the emergence of the Internet.

 

You are in denial if you think that NOT cheating in a less-than-ideal relationship would strengthen that situation.

 

Society is not *as* against those things as once was
[ok Beastiality is still big]
It seems as we become more tolerant. . .the line is getting pushed

Rocket River

 

And you're saying cheating WOULD strengthen it? If the relationship is TRULY less-than-ideal, work on the issues together and/or end it.

 

If by strengthen you mean allow them to stay together longer (essentially decreasing dissatisfaction of the unhappy party), then yes.

Multiple partners/open relationships are not a new concept, guys.

Some of you seem very naive.

That or you're just insecure and need moral high horses.

 

I don't think that they are less against them but I think that these topics have taken a back seat to other issues such as gay rights, abortions, etc.

or.....

Are you talking about going back to the days when people were stoned for such acts (still are in some places), were everything has to be talked about in code (remember when they couldn't say pregnant on tv), or you get jailed or executed because people think you're a communist?

 

Sometimes an emotional attachment is very hard to break, even if the sexual needs aren't being met. There are curious measures taken sometimes to remedy this. I've heard of men finding lovers for their wives, women encouraging their husbands to pursue extramarital relationships, again... the whole cheating thing is very emotionally driven. The feelings of betrayal and complete lack of trust will crumble a relationship more than anything.

But it is possible that two people in a loving relationship can be open minded about making sure their partners needs are being met.

Its just a difference in philosophies between yourself and Donny.

Donny obviously believes there aren't any true benefits to marriage, and that is fine, I think we are all wired differently to some regard and his lifestyle makes him happy. His way of thinking may change, or it may not.

Whats clear is that "cheating" is a very hurtful thing and the damage it does emotionally is very hard for any relationship to overcome.

 

I don't need a moral high horse...but no relationship is perfect. Introducing adultery into a strained relationship isn't going to help it. If it's beyond help, then break off the relationship.

And I'm not talking about open relationships...I'm talking about relationships where the cheating party knows it would hurt the other.

 

It seems like we're headed into one of those philosophical questions about what the greater good would be.

Easiest example I can come up with is Dale/Nancy/John Redcorn from King of the Hill.

 

That example is hilarious, given the extreme paranoia of Dale over many things... his fear of "the truth" in that regard keeps him in a tightly-wound cocoon of denial.

Bottom line is, if you aren't being open and honest in a relationship, you shouldn't be in a relationship.

 

Winner.