Are You Happy With Your Life?

Cool thread. Interesting to see where people are at in life....

I would say Im fairly happy, but not where I want to be. I have a good job that pays the bills, but its not what I want to do. I keep thinking about possibly doing landscape architecture or urban planning - something fulfilling where I can utilize my creative talents. I thought I would get that with a degree in Advertising, but I learned early on that the business was BRUTAL, and I chose sales as a job track. Right now Im doing a little more marketing, but I dont really see the job growth or upward mobility here. I want to try something new, but I am afraid of the financial burden (loans) and the possibility of not liking what I do. I sometimes think about moving to a different state and things like that, but I feel tied to Houston, and moving at this point would be difficult.

My love life is good, but relationships are complicated. The girl I am dating has 2 children, and I dont have any. Its difficult at times, but I try really hard to be a good step-boyfriend or whatever you want to call me. Never having kids, they sometimes get on my nerves. They are cool kids, and its really neat to get a kids perspective on the world, but some days I dont know if I can do it.

Life is hard, then you turn 30 in 11 days and REALLY start to freak out!!

Im going to be 30? How is this happening to me?????

 

Hey thegary, New York City is garbage! Get out of there before it drives your crazy! I'm planning on moving to another state to get the hell out of here. The city is becoming too expensive and the crime is very bad there. The people there are complete f***s as well. Worst city in United States!

 

jisangNY1, sorry for laughing, but you know what they say, if you can't stand the heat...



seriously though, have you considered therapy?

 

That's great! Just make sure you know what you want to do after you get out.

I LOVED being a music major, but when I got out, I quickly discovered that after spending *cough* almost 7 years *cough* being a music major, the only thing it prepared me for was to be a high school band director. That's not something I wanted to do. Not that there's anything wrong with that but most of my friends are and all they do is b**** and moan about how their kids are a-holes. You know, the way I was in high school. Sweet Jesus, it's my worst nightmare...

 

I understand thegary's perspective. Because for arts of almost any type NY is the place to be.

The thing about NY is that is totally unique. If you live in NY for awhile you subconciously develop a seperate set of skills to get by on.

For instance taking the subway...(especially with new laws that forbid moving between cars while in transit.)
You don't want a crowded a car because you can't sit down, you will bump into and be bumped into many times. But after awhile you learn to be suspicious of almost empty cars, because there is a good chance they smell like human feces. And it isn't even concious. Your mind will automatically trigger that wariness as you are waiting and the car coming up to you is near empty while all the others are full.

People who haven't lived in NY may ask themselves why would anyone CHOOSE to live in a place where that is a consideration on a daily basis. But after you live there long enough it just is part of the routine and you don't even think about it. You just slide down to enter another car, or take your chances.

Not having a car or parking difficulties for most means more frequent trips to the grocery store. The grocery stores themselves have limited selection and are absolutely tiny. Fresh produce is especially hard to come by. But in NY it is just a way of life for some. For others they don't even think of one stop shopping, because they can go to a shop that specializes in produce, and a different shop for cheese, and a butcher for the meat, and a baker for breads, etc. In NY it is very possible and in some ways more practicle to do that kind of shopping still.

So in a pure convenience kind of way I can understand no wanting to pay a lot for a small place to live and have to deal with those kinds of realities.

But thegary is right about the energy of the city, and the arts. It has the greatest museums in the U.S. It has the best theatre on almost all scales(not just broadway.). It has film scene where the focus is on quality films not just the next Julia Roberts/Nicole Kidman vehicle. It has huge and varied music scene where you can still see live swing bands, or punk acts, or quartets that specialize in Mozart etc. The greatest libraries and used bookstores are ther, and after awhile those incoveniences I mentioned just become a way of life and you don't really think about it...

It just depends on what you want.

For me I have to have a certain amount of 'nature' and outdoor activities in my life. Plus, while not a necessity, the conveniences of large supermarkets, and better weather played a role. That is why LA was a good comprimise. Teaching in a high need area where students are at risk could be done anywhere. Film/comedy/improv probably had to be NY or LA. My wife who does Film/TV editing as well photo retouching probably had to be NY/LA.

So given those career choice priorities together with comfort/convenience/outdoor activities desire LA become a higher choice over NY. The music here is really good as well. There is enough places that show art house cinema, and enough people into making that kind of film, with an even higher accessibility to equipment that it was worthwhile.

I guess it is all priorities. Figure out what is most important, what you can't live without, and which negatives you are willing to put up with for the positives, and then make your decisions.

Also being single or not single might be a factor as well. For the type of women that I am interested in, NY is a much better place than LA. There is a smaller pool of what I consider 'quality' women in LA. But what I consider 'quality' and what others consider quality are two different things. Since I was married when I moved out here, it didn't really matter. But I have some single friends, and I know they would have a tough time finding a long term relationship in LA.

Think about job type, standard of living, convenience and ease of living, nearby attractions(music venues, museums, beaches, outdoor activities, and are they available because of weather year round, most of the year, or only half the year, etc.), ease of meeting compatible friends, proximity to family etc. And then don't really consider any of that until you have time to visit different places and re-evaluate.

If you are moving from TN. or TX and moving to either NY or CA expect to downsize. But then if you are planning on moving back later you can expect a considerable upgrade.

For most if not everyone this kind of stuff is boring, but I am just into the comparisons since I recently went back to NY for my first visit since I moved from there.

 

Now Isabel when I mentioned in the other thread that you should date more people setting up a PROfessional enterprise wasn't what I was suggesting.

 

FB and TheGary;

I don't mind visiting NYC but I could never live there. I have a lot of friends there and was dating someone there last year but we pretty much realized it wasn't going to work because I didn't want to move to NYC. Everytime I spend more than a few days in NYC I just start feeling ruder and that's not a feeling I enjoy.

As for LA I'm not a fan of there at all. I will take riding the subways over sitting on the freeways breathing smog for hours. Yes there's nature but depending on where you live in LA it might take you a long long time to get there. I'll NorCal over the SoCal. I'll even take Sacramento over LA. Only about 2 hours to lake Tahoe and 1.5 hours to the Bay Area along with a lower cost of living.

 

Good thread..I'll throw my 2 cent in. I'm 29 stuck in a dead end job and unable to decide which direction I want to go in as far as my career goes but I don't let it get me down. I am not happy with my situation but I have faith that everything happens for a reason in life. I have fought through depression before and I know what negative thinking and despair can lead to. Ultimately you have to do what makes you happy in life. Sometimes that requires taking a leap of faith but you will never know if you don't try. Life is to enjoy.

 

I haven't found the smog to be that bad. I understand wanting NoCal over SoCal for geography and even probably for people. But Sacramento?

 

Dang. I knew I was going to hit up on some great wisdom when I clicked on this thread.

 

Best post in this thread.

I don't know of a single person who on his death bed was wishing they had worked longer hours.

 

i'm still young. probably one of the youngest amongst you guys. so i dont have quite the experience you guys have.

but i just went thru a sort of relationship ending, and it was kinda strange, because logically i shouldve been torn up about it, and i wasn't. so i started thinking about WHY i was so apathetic to it, and i think i understand.

people, and situations, are put in your life for a reason. and life doesnt always give you what you want, whether its a job or a person or a situation that didnt work out. a bad situation gives you experience and molds you into the person that you're meant to be. all those bad things that happen, and even the good things that happen such as love or success ina job, are there for a reason. think about it. i've you've ever had your heart broken, did you learn from it? i know i did...it sounds cheesy and really weird but ive been giving it alot of thought. if my life two or three years ago had gone the way i wanted it to at the time, i wouldn't be who i am today. and i like who i am today more than i do who i used to be.

everything happens for a reason. once you reach that level of belief in yourself and life, you can be a happy person. i'm utterly content with where im at right now...i shouldn't be but i am. that simple fact is a great, great feeling, and i believe that if you give it some thought, depression and sadness can be conqured.

it's funny you should bring this topic up, but i've given it a lot of thought lately. nobody can be happy 100% of the time, but if you have the right outlook, you can be content with yourself and your life. and that's what life's about right...being happy.


sorry if that was cheesy or whatever but it has been something ive been thinking about lately.

 

I guess your Berkeley experience has branded you a NorCal person. Our rivalry is as bad as Dallas/Houston's.

I'm not sure who else loves Sacramento except the hicks that live there...

 

There's probably something to but at least Dallas isn't stealing Houston's water like SoCal is doing to NorCal.

Sacramento isn't as bad as people make it out to be. Its true it lags culturally way behind the LA or the Bay Area but its a decent city easy to get around and get out of town. My main point about bringing up Sacramento though was to state how much I dislike LA.

 

Agree, 110%. I quit my job nearly 8 months ago in order to do what I wanted to do. And I did it.

I can honestly say it was the best time I've ever had, ever, easily, without question. No regrets, zero, nothing, nada.

Of course, now I'm going back in a few weeks, which I'm not looking forward too, but I don't regret leaving at all - doing what you want to do aside from what you think others think you should do is a huge key in life.

 

LOL ... it's not like I've been actively advertising this *shh*

I meant having the quadruplets ... since it's not that common, and maybe I could tamper a little to make it happen. Lose potency at 30 ... man, that would be a REAL downer then!

DoD ... your advice is great. Do what you feel will make you happy. We only get this one go around, make the most of it.

I would also recommend trying life overseas for a bit ... it's exciting, challenging, and a real eye opener. Plus you get a different perspective on l ife, meet some amazing people. Break the monotony, and if it's not for you ... you can always go back.

 

Manny

I sort of fall into the "life is pretty good" category. Of course there are things I would like to changed as well (Rockets, Raiders and a bunch of bills ) but overall I am pretty happy.

As far as your job goes, sometimes a change really can make a difference in a positive way. I made a change in jobs years ago from a job where I didnt feel was right for me to my current one and I am so glad I made the change.

Things will look up for you soon.

On the bright side, your Broncos look real good!

 

No. (WTF? BBS thingie says my message is too short.)

 

hey manny.

As of right now i am 23, 5th year senior at UT-austin and am heading to med school come august. I also have a very loving GF..however med school is in ft. lauderdale, FL which means long D relationship because my GF will be in houston for optometry school (she's a 2nd year already).. If we survive 2 years of LongD time then i will marry her... In short Im happy right now..but I know i willl not be too thrilled when it comes to august..(i hear med school is torture)..

So my final answer..yes im happy with my life right now..but that can all change in the next several months..