Well, me and the missus are expecting our second child.....in March. TL; DR - Didn't think wife was pregnant, when we find out she is pregnant the first doctor said 6-8 weeks along, 3 weeks later we find out it is more like 30+ weeks. She visited the doctor last month after missing her cycle for a few months before. Her last cycle was in July, the same month she was starting a new birth control regiment and changed up her lifestyle in terms of diet by drinking water, etc. The doctor said there could be some changes and whatnot because of both of those things. After she did not get one in August, we attributed it to the changes. A second one was missed in September and then we began to get a little suspicious but attribute it to the same thing. October comes around and mid-month she takes a pregnancy test. Results come back negative. Speak to the doctor and he states that the changes could be causing the missing cycle issue but we could make an appointment and come in. The missus declines, she says she hasn't experienced any symptoms (weight gain, sickness, etc.). November rolls around a few weeks later and still nothing so she drops another pregnancy test. Again, the results are negative but this time she goes ahead and schedules an appointment. OBGYN appointments at the end of the year are hard to come by but we get in on December 13. They test and tell us that she is pregnant and will test the blood to get an idea of length of pregnancy. Blood work comes back and they say she is 6-8 weeks pregnant based on hCG levels and the time of the at-home tests. They do a second set of blood work the next week and come to the same conclusion, 6-8 weeks. I'm uncomfortable with this because they didn't do an ultrasound or any other testing other than blood work. I told her to schedule an appointment with the doctor that delivered our first child. We get in there yesterday. They use the last cycle date and just guesstimate that she is about 26 weeks. A few of the nurses looked at her and said no way she is 26 weeks along but that we would get a better idea after some testing and an ultrasound. The ultrasound tech places the sender/receiver on her belly and says "Yup, that's a baby." We're in there for about 45 minutes and the ultrasound calculates she is closer to 31 weeks pregnant. She also tells us that it is a boy. The doctor (who we're friends with but the missus didn't not want to go to because of out-of-network costs) comes in and says "What the hell is going on?" in a playful but serious manner. We tell him about what we've done and how we got to where we are at. He says from the looks of everything it looks like we'll have a new addition in 2 months but honestly he is not sure and calls it a grey area. Due to the uncertainty, he wants to start seeing her every other week and has requested the work done at the other facility to examine that as well. All the tests, ultrasounds, etc. looked good and there were no problems reported but I am a worried mess right now. I just don't want anything to be wrong. I'm mad at myself for being neglectful and if something happens to be wrong after delivery I can't help to think that I am going to seriously blame myself. Couldn't sleep last night, I feel sick and just stressed. Hopefully everything turns out OK though and I will be an ecstatic father in a couple months but it seems like it is going to be an eternity. I guess we'll see as the time goes..... Sorry about the length of the post
Wow Pun, that's a weird series of events. My wife is 21 weeks pregnant now as a result of our 3rd attempt at IVF. We've been trying to conceive for nearly 10 years, so I know all about this stuff . The failed pregnancy tests don't make any sense. Was she using some old tests that were perhaps no longer effective? Those tests pick up as little as 25-50 hCG, so I'd think defective tests would be the only explanation for them to show negative if she was that far along. My wife's hCG for example was 53 at our first blood test at 4 weeks, and by 6 weeks it was >10,000. We did get a positive home pregnancy test when her levels were only at 53, but it was very faint for a few days. I think a lot of this confusion would have been solved if the original doctor had done an ultrasound, as they are able to detect a heartbeat as early as 6 weeks. Please keep us updated on how things progress. If the doctor says everything is fine, then I would trust him if he's never steered you wrong before. Anyways, congratulations to you and your new bride .
Congrats man! I hope and pray all is well! The main thing keeping me from wanting a second is the worry I had from the minute we found out my wife is pregnant until about the time Harps turned 1. I still worry my ass off, but man, those months were soooooooo stressful.
Congrats man, I am praying for y'all and your doctors. I agree with stress part. My wife never sleeps. She is a light sleeper and ever time baby makes any noise she wakes up. Let's just say lack of sleep is my wife's kryptonite.
¡FELICIDADES, Señor y Señora Lil Pun! Weird stuff. If you and the missus feel more comfortable with the previous OB/GYN, by all means just nicely stop going to the current one and find the previous one. You also have a right to explain that to the doctor you know (please explain this again, I am a bit lost on who is who) and to say you want to continue seeing the first doctor. As a professional, your friend doctor should understand. It's like we've witnessed your life changes through the forum, man... what with purchase of vehicles, your marriage, and now another Lil'er Pun. Take a deep breath, man, and believe me, you will need to be rested and feeling well when you have to explain things... you don't want to make it more difficult or stressful right now on you, your wife, and the little bundle of joy and your other child because you don't sleep or get enough rest. Feels weird to consider you one of the more respected peeps around here along with a few others. Much props on the growth of your family.
Got an insurance question for you guys. Once we got married, I added her to my insurance but only as secondary insurance because I already have our child on mine and adding the wife raised the cost about $7 per pay period. The doctor's office called back today and said that her insurance deductible was $1000 but mine is only $500 but we cannot have my insurance be primary while her insurance is still active. I'm wondering if we canceled her insurance and made mine the primary, would they or could they use preexisting condition or something similar to deny the claims that they are sent through? I've contacted my insurance company and they said to contact HR and I have but waiting on a response so I thought I'd ask others who may have knowledge of what the insurance company's response would be.
Congratulations Pun!!! But one thing confuses me.....in all of this, has she not shown ANY signs of pregnancy? Mainly being....has she not gotten a big belly? 30+ weeks of pregnancy suggests to me that she should have quite a nice little bump....
Congrats friend! The wife and I have been trying for over a year and we finally went the IUI route early this month. We'll find out if it did indeed work sometime this week hopefully.
She has a bump, but not a 30+ week bump. The doctor did state that the due date is a grey area because there are so many unknowns at this point until he is able to examine everything. She never showed any signs really except the missed cycles. No sickness, no real weight gain, etc. I looked at some picture and to me it looks, based on her current bump, that she'd be around 20-24 weeks but I'm not a doctor so.....
Your own insurance company is providing secondary coverage on your wife and you're hoping to drop her own coverage, making your insurance her primary coverage so that the deductible won't be as high. Do I understand that correctly? I don't know, but I'm guessing your insurance won't appreciate you foisting the bill on to them when she could easily keep her own insurance, and will find a way to stop you -- such as denying coverage. You're probably not the first guy to think of trying it, so they've got language in place to protect themselves. If I were you, I wouldn't risk it or deal with the hassle for $500. But, that's a guess. You should wait for someone who actually knows what they're talking about.
You can cancel her other coverage easily. Just have her tell her HR department/manager/etc. that she has other coverage and wants to drop her own. They can do, probably even back to 1/1/2013. You'll likely have to give them a copy of an id card that shows her on your plan. You are allowed to put her on your plan and are not required for it to be secondary.
