My wife and I have separate accounts our paychecks go into, and a joint account we pay equal amounts into, which we use to pay mortgage, food, home repairs, vacations, etc. We don't have set amounts, we just top it off when it's getting low. I have a paid-off car and no school loans left, she's still paying off both for herself, and she didn't feel right letting me pay for her stuff. It's a matter of pride. And this way she can spend on lots of clothes from her account and I can spend on lots of videogames and do some light investing out of my account, and neither of us feels guilty about it or needs to ask permission. Bigger reason though is actually because she works in the public school system and is doing an income-based repayment plan where she can get the loan forgiven in 10 years. She can't do that though if she combined incomes with me because she'd be over the income threshold and wouldn't qualify anymore. And WI being a community property state, we actually *had* to get a pre-nup in order to separate our incomes for tax-filing purposes. Here's something to keep in mind though re: pre-nup. I had a close friend get divorced a couple years ago, and I got another close friend in the process of it right now. The shitty thing is, even if you & your ex agree to how you want things to work post-breakup, the court might not care and force different decisions on both of you. Both my friends *really* wish they had pre-nups, even the ones who made out *better* than they would've without one, because they feel shitty about the way the courts yanked them and their exes around. And I'm told that even if you do have a pre-nup, some courts will comb through them and look for the slightest errors in order to consider them invalid and throw them out. So even pre-nups aren't 100%, but IMO they are never a bad idea.
Every situation is different, but we worked out an agreed upon shared budget. Basically determined all of the things we share the cost of (shared bills, shared savings, vacation, necessities, kids, etc.). We each put the required portion of our paycheck in the shared budget account. We do 50/50, but I think if one spouse makes more than the other, and it is agreed upon, you could have a different split. And whatever is left over we just each put in our own individual bank account. This has worked well for us.
Started out having separate accounts. Over time, for reasons of just making things simple, one of them became our main account that we share. I still do have my own that's pretty much just for paying bills.
My gf and I have a joint Cap One Venture card which we put all our expenses. At the end of the billing cycle, we break down the itemized charges. Utilitties, Groceries, House expenses, going out...all those we split. Individual expenses...my parts for my car, her 5k's, makeup... we pay individually. We keep our separate bank accounts as well just in case we need to make a purchase that we don't want seen on the card...surprise gifts and stuff like that. We use the Venture card so that we can collect rewards points for stuff we have to pay for regardless. It takes a little work, but it really works out for us and we ususally collect about $1000 in flight and hotel rewards over the course of a year. That, and the fact that we pay off the card each month so we never pay interest on the card seals the deal for us.
I agree with the advice here -- more than one way to skin a cat, so joint or separate so long as you do it thoughtfully and in agreement, you can probably make it work. I do a joint account, but we have separate credit cards. Pretty much all our purchases go through credit cards, so using separate accounts makes bookkeeping easier. I can just hand her the statement and ask her if all these transactions are legit, and I'll do the same for mine.
It depends on the couple. If the couple is independent, then naturally go with separate accounts. The joint shared account for bills and separate personal accounts for each individual works better for those who like to monitor their spending and diversify the risk of accounts getting compromised. If you're living paycheck to paycheck couple, separate accounts will probably be a better way to go to reduce the risk of overdraft.
Everyone is different, but for us, it's just so much easier to have everything combined. Seems kind of odd to have separate accounts when you're married, but I am admittedly a little old fashioned when it comes to things like that. What's mine is yours, what's yours is mine, right? I do have a DBA account I use only for my rent house, but it's at the same bank as our other accounts so she can see it any time she wants (not that she'd want to). I only use it for paying the mortgage and depositing the rent. 2 transactions per month, so there's not much to see. We stopped using credit cards after we paid them all off last year. We each have a debit card that comes out of our joint checking account. We also do a budget every month, so no secrets or surprises. Check out Every Dollar, it's better than Mint IMO.
SEPARATE ACCOUNTS (if she works) with you each responsible for particular bills. My wife doesn't work, so it isn't really an issue for me but I can tell you I have seen many otherwise happy relationships destroyed over the finances.
Wife and I have always had joint accounts. evertyhing gets spent on our own credit cards so easy to track spending (plus points) Of course it helps that we are both fiscally responsible but it is "our money", i don't like the mine vs yours way
We have separate accounts, but I handle all our finances, so its as if we had a joint account. For whatever reason, it's something psychological to her to see money that is in her account so I just let it be and let her have her own account. Either way, I just separate the bills and make sure we aren't in the red. We probably would save more if we just organized and budgeted, but we are blessed and do well for ourselves. I am sure things will change once we bring kids into the equation.
Same scenario. I handle all finances but the wifey likes to have her own account with some funds ready for her - gives her a piece of mind.
My wife and I have joint accounts and separate credit cards that are paid from joint account. We’re both good with finances and she’s probably more frugal than I am. So it works. We have 4 married couple friends that have separate accounts, 3 of them are horror stories, while the other it works for. It really depends on trust I think. If you trust your wife it shouldn’t matter joint or separate. If you can’t trust your husband/wife I’d suggest joint for sure.
My situation has worked out well. -Family master savings -wife’s checking -my checking -kids checking (put a little in each month even though she’s only 3) Beginning of the month we divy up the bills and pay out of our checking separately and contribute to savings. After that what’s left is ours to spend on whatever. However if we run low spending money on stupid sh$& like JCrew and me at Guitar center it’s tough luck. Savings account is for the big stuff. Home remodel, emergencies, new cars, vacations, etc. That works for us. Some couples are adamant about joint accounts. I think it’s fine to do it this way. Have a little freedom.
No matter what system you use, create a system where it is clear when you are going overbudget. It's easy to just assume you have the money to spend and end up spending more than you thought you did. We have a joint account, but we allocate all of our spending using Mint.com (there are plenty other services or apps like this) to different budgets. Each of us get a guilt free allowance, and all of the bills get taken care of, etc. But it also keeps each of us from spending lavishly on dumb things, while still getting to spend some money on dumb things.
Anyone answering this question with an absolute has no idea what they’re talking about. You both just have to figure out what works best for your situation. And that can change over time. On a second note, I got a really good reminder this morning while at a Starbucks of what I gave up years ago when I got married. This particular young lady nearly made me risk it all.
mrs jontro and i have separate accounts and we just take turns paying for things. both of us suck at financial management so not much savings yet. i would like a joint account, tho my bank currently doesn't have that service.
I don’t get the “separate accounts with each responsible for certain bills” idea. That seems like a roommate or domestic partner setup?
