I am not religious. A girl I'm into is very Christian. What are the chances, or will the differences in religious beliefs never allow it to happen? Anybody with experience dealing with this predicament?
I am a Muslim and I dated a Hindu back in college. Basic polar opposites when it comes to religion (I believe in one god Allah aka God) while Hindus believe in many gods (330 million) such as Krishna or Vishnu, etc. Anyways, we went out of our comfort zones religiously to date each other. We saw that outside of religion we were "nearly perfect" for each other. Being young and naive.... Anyways we soon found out how important Religion was to us (we were both religious, which seems different than your situation) and the ultimate confrontation came up. I asked her to convert. She said she'd think about it, a month later she told me no, and I broke it off with her. Of course it dragged on and we didnt officially cut off until 3 months later, but that's just because thats just how things go sometimes. Anyways JD, If she wasnt as religious or if I wasnt as religion I believe things would've worked out for the long run. So if her religousness doesnt get in the way for you, and you dont mind stepping out of your comfort zone, I think you got a good chance of things working out.
The problem is she believes that God does not want her to date someone who doesn't believe. I do not believe. I don't care that she is religious, doesn't bother me at all, just don't think she is willing to let it go. Just wanted to see if anyone was able to overcome such a thing.
Everyone is different. Some girls will want the guy to share in their religion, others don't care so much.
Depends on what your goals are in the relationship. Is this something that you'll heavily invest yourself in, potentially leading to marriage in the future? Or is this more sort of a casual relationship that may break off in a year or two? How do you feel about her religion? Religion is a bigger issue if this is going to be a longer-term thing. Keep in mind, if she is very Christian, she also probably believes you aren't saved because you don't believe. Are you okay being in a relationship with someone who believes you'e going to hell? Is she okay being in a relationship with someone she believes is going to hell? Should you choose to pursue this relationship, there is a reasonable likelihood of her asking you to become Christian so you can be saved. I would recommend against "converting" just to make her happy. I've seen in relationships before where one person will convert to marry the other and while they're happy in the short term, problems surface later that cause a lot of tension within the marriage. It would be a disservice to her to do something like that. If you're legitimately feeling it, and want to be a part of the same religion of your own volition, that's different, but try to make that decision independent of your feelings for this girl.
I don't think it'll work if it'll bother her that much. I've dated a girl that followed a different religion. Neither of us were religious enough to care. We broke up for different reasons, and religion had no affect in our relationship. If your girl cares that deeply about her religion, then she'll eventually will want you to convert....
If that's what she really wants and that's central to her finding someone, can't see how it can work out. How can you overcome that? Only way would be for you to start believing, her to stop believing, or both of you to appreciate what the other believes spiritually. If none of these things are going to happen, I wouldn't advise her or you to get into anything serious right now. Maybe talk about it more, give it some time see if you reach a happy medium. Whatever you do though, don't just ignore it, it can come back to bite you in the ass.
How bad do you wanna hit it? How good can you act? I suggest you ask yourself those two things and find out.
Repped, lol. Okay, JD. Lie to her. This is coming from a devout Christian, by the way, so enjoy the irony, lol. Go to church with her as much as you can handle it. If she asks you what you think, lie. "Oh, it was cool. I'm still getting used to this sort of experience, so I don't want to make a full judgement." What's she gonna say? "I can read your mind, Mr. JD, and I can tell you don't really believe?" Doubtful. Love should not be wasted over religion.
the title sounds like a song by REM. Don't worry about her being a christian. This religion is the same as democracy in politics.
Really depends on how extreme you both are. I'm pretty much an athiest while my wife is Christian. She knows how I feel, but I usually keep my mouth shut about anti religion stuff. I'll attend church with her to make her happy. She's not an extreme Christian, and I'm not an extreme athiest, so it doesn't really get ugly. I dated a girl once who attended church 4+ times a week. Not ever time was an actual service, some were bible study crap, but you can get the gist of how religious she was. She didn't mind us dating, but said we would never get married (not that I really cared) because she needs someone with her beliefs. So, it really comes down to the extremes. Just don't go bashing religion to her on the first date, but if she asks, tell her your beliefs. The religious people are the crazy ones about not being able to be with someone with different beliefs than theirs, so she'll make up the decision on if she can be with you.
My girlfriend of 3 years is religious and I am not. It hasn't been a problem yet. The only time it could have been a problem is when her dad asked me what kind of church I attended growing up. But I was completely honest and told him I used to go to a Methodist church. Fortunately, the questioning stopped there. So it will only be an issue if she makes it one. If she is intent on doing so, then it will be hard to be with her.
It's all about managing expectations without lying. If you really like her and can see you spending the rest of your life with her, it's worth giving a second thought on religion. I would tell girls that I date that I don't believe in organized religion, but do believe in the possibility of higher power. It's not a lie, but I do leave out the part about how I highly doubt there is such a being. If she truly wants to be with you, she will. You could even use God in your arguements as to why you should be together. Say crap like 'I think God has brought me to you so I could find him' and **** like that that blind religious girls eat up.
