Testimonial: Ninjas can kill anyone they want! Ninjas cut off heads ALL the time and don't even think twice about it. These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time. I heard that there was this ninja who was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon the ninja killed the whole town. My friend Mark said that he saw a ninja totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window. And that is from the front page. Thanks, fade, I needed some diversion tonight! Edit: I had to add this part: Ninjas are sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants. I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart. These guys are totally awesome and that's a fact. Ninjas are fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet. I can't wait to start yoga next year. I love ninjas with all of my body (including my pee pee).
Did y'all read the "Hate Mail" section!???? I don't know what's funnier...this site, or the idiots who took it seriously and emailed the guy!
I found this funny..... ============================================== Apparently, there was this ninja who was hanging out with some kid. They played basketball and ate hamburgers together. One day the kid was like “Do you want to hear something that will mess up your life?” The ninja was like “What are you talking about?” “A real live ghost story,” said the kid. “O.K.” said the ninja. Then the kid began…“These two buddies were eating tacos together one night at a bar and it was raining really hard (outside). They were just talking. Then all of a sudden, there was a noise, like a gurgle or squirt. The buddies were like “What the heck is that?” And guess what…it happened again! They were both completely freaked out. (One buddy couldn’t even finish his meal.) They briefly looked around the bar for clues, but they never found out what it was. And both buddies went home scared to death.” After hearing the ghost story, the ninja was so scared that he grabbed the kid and spanked him until both parties squirted urine. ============================================== This site is probably tied for the funniest site. Tied with maddox.ximission.com or whatever that site is.
The Pirate Dance SCENE 1: The scene opens up with some soft annoying music to get the audience super pissed. The camera will show a bunch of pirates eating chicken buttholes. Fortunately, a ninja sees everything and realizes what a bunch of bull crap it is. So this one ninja walks up to them and is like, “Yo what’s your problem?” The camera zooms directly on a pirate’s mouth, which states “Get out of here now.” and buttholes fall all over the silverware. Then the camera cuts to the ninja’s mouth with says “No,” but nothing gross happens. The audience then sees ninja pull out a huge guitar which is really medium sized and wails. But the pirates don’t explode, they start to dance.........hard, harder than the hardest blackest boner alive. And when they dance, the pirates look like a bunch of crabby and stupid moms. Everybody in the entire world craps their pants laughing at the pure stupidity of the pirates. But the ninja has A.D.D. and starts losing energy/power and the pirates start stopping dancing. (There will be some suspense filled violins and guitars playing so that the audience gets scared and/or pumped-scared.) In several motions, the pirates come toward the ninja. BUT, out of nowhere this bad ass lake appears and a huge hippo busts out of it hard. Water sprays everywhere, including the pirates’ shirts (which causes their boobs to barely appear through their shirts). Most pirates are like “This can’t be happening!” The hippo says “Guess what, it is.” and slaps five with ninja pretty hard. And the ninja says “let’s rock brother.” They both pull out expensive guitars and start wailing on them really really hard. Since the ninja can’t concentrate, the hippo thoughtfully guides his hand, because they are blood brothers till the end of time and space. Then the pirates all morph into this tiny diaper and the hippo and ninja morph into a super poop-filled baby that takes the biggest frigg’n dump in the pirate/diaper. The pirates’ scream turns into a crap-gargle (this will make audience laugh gregariously). The ninja's A.D.D. heals and the two buddies/brothers smoke cigarettes and get ice-cream and pop, which they enjoy a lot. The End
Sheer brilliance: A ninja is sleeping at his house. Some idiot walks by singing a super annoying song. Then the ninja wakes up super pissed and ready to rock. The guy just keeps walking and singing, while the ninja starts cutting down a building. When the guy walks by the building, it falls on him. (When the building is falling, a guitar will be wailing hard in the background.) There will be a close up of the dude's feet sticking out from under the building. The feet explode all over the place, because of blood pressure. Then we see that the ninja was playing the guitar. Then all these babes start coming out of nowhere and the ninja starts wailing ever harder (if that's even possible). Then the camera starts fading out and then explodes. THE END.
Its funny how often the same sites are posted in the hangout, just so many people have come and gone between times, its like its brand new again.
