[!!] Roommate horror stories

Yeah, I got one for you.

I told my mom to come stay with me so she could get the courage to get out of an abusive marriage (although she probably dished it out too). I thought a few weeks/months to get her back on her feet would be just what she needed. That was last July and she is still with me even through the sale of my old home and my move to a new one. Luckily, she says she might be moving in with my sister (who also lived with me for 9 months several years ago so SHE could get on her feet) but I'll believe it when I see it.

Try being 31 and meeting girls and trying to explain that your situation isn't the usual "live with my mom" one and that you're actually taking care of her with no financial compensation (meaning she don't pay rent). Luckily, I found a nice, beautiful girl that understands but who still doesn't appreciate us having to be super secret and quiet while having sex.

 

Swoly replies to Lady_Di's "I'm bored" in 5, 4, 3, ...

 

I have a few just to lazy to post here right now with all the draft day stuff.


are you just talking about bad roommates

or like akward/funny moments caused by you or your roommate?

 

I have several.

First that comes to mind was living with two other guys from my fraternity. One of the roommates was this stupid italian that neither of us liked. One day we come home and he explains that he's tired of us eating his stuff and that we would all have individual shelves with our own food on it. Then we both looked in the pantry and noticed he had labeled his shelf. On it was written "Tony Food."

Needless to say, the rest of that semester he would get a "Tony Bed" label on his bed, a "Tony Car" label on his car, etc. I tried to get his girl to put a "Tony Girlfriend" one on her forehead, but she wouldn't.

Another one was at the Coral Club my freshman year. One evening, some buddies of mine took an entire patio set (with umbrella) the front carpet in front of the office (about the size of a king size bed) and one of their trashcans and placed it all in my place. A few weeks later I had the manager come by with a noise complaint from the night before. Of course, she saw all of the stuff immediately. IIRC, I think I had 3 days to vacate?

I'm sure more may come to mind.

 

The following story was brought to you by:

 

I won't say anything more than I kicked my Mom out of MY apartment when I was 17 because she complained about the partying and I was paying all the bills.

She did eventually get her act together.

 

What? You saved that picture?

Here is the patio furniture in my place way back then. At first I thought it was taken outside, but thanks to Facebook, a buddy of mine reminded me it was my place due to the light string dangling in front of my face.

 

ok then

so here is one

freshman year of college i had two roommates in a closet that UCLA liked to pass off as a "dorm room"

one of my roommates was a pretty normal guy him and I used to hang out go out with chicks etc.

the third roommate was a nice guy but very socially inept, he went to his high school senior prom by himself (he has a prom photobook to show us)

so my other roommate Claude and I tried to make it our years goal to get him laid by the end of the school year.

we tried to set him up soo many times but nothing worked he would not know how to talk to girls or anything.

so claude had a plan there was this girl that lived on the floor above us that basically known as the dorm slut. you get some liquor in her and her legs would be spread open faster than you could say "open sesame"

so there was a floor party we got her drunk, we got him drunk and and got them both in the small study lounge aka sex box and closed the door on them.

both claude and I figured that he would come out a man since there was no way he could screw this one up, the girl was pretty much naked going into the sex box.

about 5 minutes later we hear a blood curdling scream and see her running out of the sexbox just drenched in his vomit

i mean from face down.

he comes out vomit all over his mouth..

i mean we got him drunk just not that drunk but apparently he must have puked like a gallon on her she kept screaming and ran into the bathroom.


yeah he never got a chance with a girl again that year. once word got around about that no girl in our dorm hall gave him a second look.



whenever I grab lunch/coffee with him now (he is doing a phd program at ucla) i still bring that up he laughs at it now but he said he was sooo horrified he did that. he bought the girl like some new shoes to say sorry.

 

* Grammar. OK. Check.
* TWSS possibility: none. Check.
* chance to post angry smilies: none. Check.

Why would you think I'd comment on her "I'm bored" comment? I don't get it.

What's the point of posting his picture again? What is the goal here...?

Anyway, I've never had roommates, but I've shared rooms with my older brothers, and during the time I got to the 'States my brother would wake up and go directly to the stereo to turn it on to KRBE every morning. No matter what day it was, weekday or weekend, he'd turn it on. I asked him nicely to let me sleep some more and wait to play his stereo loudly to wake me up. He pulled the Big Brother card and ignored my request.

One time I got tired of asking, so I waited until he left the previous night and re-wired the speakers and internal cables on the stereo. I had "electronics" workshop classes back in secondary school in Mexico, so I took off what I could inside the board and changed some wires. I wrote stuff down and remembered how to put them back.

He never figured out what was wrong with it on that Monday when he tried to turn it on, and even though I was awakened by his noise trying to fix it, I felt good I got payback. Until now, he doesn't know what happened. He just bought another stereo in a couple of weeks, and I rewired the old one after he gave it to me when he said "Here, you can have it, it doesn't work." Good times.

 

She had major problems at the time. I paid most of the bills from the time I turned 15 and got a job. At 17 she got us kicked out of the house we were renting so my grandparents co-signed a lease for me on an apartment.

My mom lived on the streets for a couple months until I took pity on her and let her move in against my grandparents advice. It only lasted a couple months before I had to kick her out again.

I like to think that was a turning point in her life and taking a hard line and kicking her out made her realize what a mess her life was because she slowly got things better.

 

I have to find two new roommates after August, and now reading the horror stories I don't know about finding them on Craigslist anymore

 

it was freshman yr in college. i lived in a dorm w/ a roommate. we shared a bathroom with another suite that was connected between our room and their room.

anyhow, the suitemates kept using all of our toilet paper. one night (10 cent/wing night) i returned home and had to go logging. i get in there and take care of business only to discover the suitemates had used up all the toilet paper again

no worries though, i went european and use their bar of soap to clean myself up. i think i left a little piece of crap on the soap as a gift. they never said anything so i guess they never found out.

after that we made sure to keep all of our toiletries in our own room.

the end.

 

I had a roomate that liked to call the 1800 sex lines (this was before the internet was so easily available). He would rack up literally $300 per month in phone charges.

Every month when we would figure out who owed what on the bills, I would never get to see a phone bill because he would always get to it first and hide it. He would only say "your portion is $30" regardless if I made any long distance phone calls or not (this was before everyone carried a cell phone). He never knew that I knew about it, so it made it fun watching him try and explain why I couldn't see the bill. His best excuse was that he prepaid the phone bill for the whole semester and that I just needed to give him $30 each month.

Good: I got free long distance.
Bad: I would never use the "house" telephone. I would always have to go to my room to use the phone.

 

You could have had all the free phone sex you wanted also since he probably would have never known.