Report from Staples Center 11/25

All I was asking for was one more thing to be thankful for on this Thanksgiving weekend. I pulled on my "Two-rrific" Houston Chronicle front page T-shirt and took I-10 east to the Superstore (I should have continued all the way to the 610 loop - would have nad more fun). I took my seat in the nosebleed section above the skyboxes and was ready to Maplewood-Bellaire-Museum District Represent.

How was it I was seated next to the only rabid, psychotic (and pretty darn large) Clippers fan in the universe? True, the seats were fuller than last November's excursion with wrath-of-khan (who has since moved on to other cities, alas), but the fans were pretty listless nevertheless. This may be an exciting young Clippers team, but most of the really exuberant ball fans in LA still hold Lakers tix.

The game was excrutiating from the outset. The Clips were suffocating them on defense and cutting through them like a hot knife through butter on the other end. About halfway though the first, Stevie tried to take over and made a few nice shots - one was so sweet, I thought it was an airball from my vantage point. That is, it was so on-target that the net did not even move. Stevie is so good he defies physics.

At one point, he grabbed a defensive rebound and started down the court for a fast break when Piatkowski grabbed his shoulders, then took the ball when Steve inevitable dropped it (which you tend to do when someone grabs your arms while you are running with the ball). Pike then had the nerve to protest the foul call. Could he have been sharing a doobie with Lamar?

In any case, Stevie became frustrated with the hard fouls (most of which did not result in whistles) and was called for a T shortly after committing a foul of his own - one of the Rockets staffers had to literally hold him back from a ref.

Just for good measure, Francis was hammered by at least three Clippers at the end of the quarter - you guessed it: no call! - and after 1 it was 29-16. Sweet mother.

During the break I looked for celebrities. Aside from Penny Marshall and Billy Crystal, none of them really show up for the Clippers. But because I was so high up, I could pretend that people on the floor that even remotely looked like famous people were indeed celebrities. With that in mind, I saw Anne Heche, Tom Hanks, Steven Spielberg, Denzel Washington, and Benito Mussolini. Okay, he's dead and not exactly a celebrity, but I swear this one guy looked just like him, if he had worn cashmere.

After a few minutes into the 2nd wondering what Griffin was still doing in, Moochie and Oscar (say, aren't those the names of the Odd Couple?) came in for Steve and Cuttino.

Moochie was literally slumping while dribbling. I don't mean he lowered a shoulder for a drive, I mean I thought he was going to fall asleep. Then I realized it is just a new style - Drunken Master Ball. He downs a flask of whiskey before the game to loosen up the flow. Better than what Kato and Willis were doing before the game - they obviously had slathered each other generously with lotion and gave each other massages - what else could explain their dropped passes?

More on Moochie: he seemed a little scared. True, he nailed a couple of important 3's down the stretch, but he gave up more than a couple open ones, too - lots of hesitation from the poofed-up hairy one. He was also called for carrying - and I'm sure he's the only one in the league who does that.

At this point, the Rockets were all but asleep. In fact, after a rousing bit of choreography to "Get UR Freak On," the Clippers dancers closed out the quarter with a 17-3 run against the Rockets to put hte halftime score at 100-7. Okay, not really, but it could have happened. After Griffin honked a wide open 3 with 32 seconds left, he redeemed himself with 3 to end the half at 50-37.

As noted in the recap, Rice came alive in the third. His two inside buckets came on isos against Corey Maggette. Finally Odom came over to help, but it was pretty cool to watch while it lasted. He just went right over Maggette, who can jump pretty durn high when he wants to, by the by. Rice also had some hard defensive matchups. From what I could tell, he was assigned to Odom, Maggette and Darius Miles while he was on the court. This is not a man known for his defensive prowess, but he seems to have done all right. I am no huge Rice fan, but I have to give him credit for that.

Here are some stats from the middle of the 3rd: Blocks: Clippers 5, Rockets ZERO. Missing any former players right now? Leading the Rockets in rebounds at this point: WALT WILLIAMS, with 4. Say what????

And, yes, Brand was awesome. Unstoppable. Lightning fast under the basket. Amazing.

End of 3, 72-63.

In the fourth, the Rockets kept trying and trying and coming so close... nice effort to watch. But the Clippers made most of their free throws, Brand continued to be unstoppable, and Odom had a nasty point-blank block on a KT attempted dunk to seal it.

Check this: The crowd gave the Clippers a standing ovation at the end. A standing O? I love the Rockets, but, come on, this ain't the Lakers they beat. And they nearly blew a gigantic lead. Maybe they felt bad for being so motionless for most of the game.

Why, why can't the Rockets win at Staples in November? (Please, no stats condracting this - let me wallow in my pity)