I have gotten into another argument with my girlfriend. Lately the argument has been getting worse. I am now considering doing some counseling as a last alternative. Rather than blaming one another, I want to see if this helps. Anyone have experience with this, if so, where would you recommend? I live in the Willowbrook area, don't mind driving though.
I know you are being sarcastic, but I was strongly considering getting married within the next 6 months prior to this argument. 23-24. We have both graduated college and I am beginning my career and she is applying for medical school.
LOL, I know what you mean. After a while though, it gets old and she won't want to hear that anymore.
Keep your tone of voice down. Bring her tone of voice down to your level. Always use complete sentences, and tell her what you feel without fearing that she might not like it. When you communicate better, you're opening the doors to your relationship. Use words like "I feel [your feeling] when I hear you say [what she says]" and "I did [something she didn't like] because I believe that [the thing you did] would [your feeling at that time and its effect]." You don't know what she feels and you can't assume anything. Perhaps she wants you just to listen. Don't interrupt her. If you don't mind me asking, about what was the argument? If it is minor and it escalates into a major argument, perhaps you BOTH need to get counseling. Domo arigato
It is a bit personal, but it has reached the point of "minor escalating to major". Yesterday was a prim example. To the point where she asked that I move out. When I mentioned possibly talking things out, she said that she is tired of talking about it and she is not happy with the way things are going between us. I told her that I would do counseling some time ago, but things were ok after. This time I feel that if I don't I will lose her. Thanks for the feedback!
My hats off to you for your willingness to take a step towards counselling. Is your girlfriend willing as well or does she think you're nuts?
Ask her if she's willing to go to counseling with you. It couldn't hurt. She will see how you are with a neutral person in the room.
Sounds like she already has one foot out the door of the relationship. You're not being fair to yourself if you want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you (especially if she isn't willing to go to counseling or take it seriously). Don't be afraid to lose someone that isn't afraid of losing you.
i know it sucks but if you need counseling before you're even married, it may be a huge red flag that you're not meant for each other.
That line above is quite worrisome man. She's tired of talking about it? I have a feeling counseling may not be enough for her. Have you both discussed how her being in Med. School would also affect the relationship? What have the arguments been about? (if you don't mind my asking and if you don't mind divulging that info). Like someone posted above, you two might not be a good match(but it might take you some time to figure that out). Marriage would definitely not be the right move right now. (I've had my fair share of drama over the past few years-counseling, no counseling, marriage talks, moving out, etc. At some point if you might have to pray seriously over it(if you're a Christian and believe in prayer) if not you just have to figure out if it's worth moving forward or cutting bait- some tough choices nonetheless) Hope that helps in some way.
Great advice "DieHard Rocket" and "Macalu". Couldn't have said it better myself. It took years to learn the words of wisdom you two just dished out so hopefully the OP takes the advice to heart. It's tough advice but needed.
