I got this from another board.... ********************************************** I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?" I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.
Girl: Honey, what are you doing? Guy: Oh, I'm just fluffing my pillow. I just can't get it quite right.
Haha, Yes. I will hold this with me always. Can't help but think if I actually tried this, however, that it would end up in a breakup; the girl would be incredibly pissed. If she doesn't wanna break up with you, you might wanna break up with her after all the inevitable b****ing that is soon to follow after not buying any of the stuff.
And I don't think there is a guy in the world who would pull that shopping stunt... except as either an object lesson or revenge.
I've told every girl i've ever dated the story of Mick Jagger and Jerry Hall. During an interview, Jerry Hall was asked how she and Mick had stayed together for Sooo long with him being a superstar and adored by women globally. She replied that she screws him every time she sees him, regardless of whether she wants to or not. She makes sure there is nothing left when he leaves for the day and then does it again at night. Guys are really damn simple. Make sure the fuel tank down below is empty and make sure the stomach is full. And shut up during rockets games.
