I'm not really sure what to do about it. I've tried telling her that she shouldn't drink again, and she agrees, but every time I drink I don't feel like I have the authority to tell her she shouldn't. It seems hypocritical. When we do drink together, she sneaks drinks while I'm in the bathroom. Or finishes off a bottle of wine and fills it up with water because she knows I'm watching her. She's punched me in the face when drunk (although admittedly I was drunk as well, and did call her fat, but to be fair, a slap would've been more appropriate) I'm just sick of having the same fight with her over and over again. I'm not perfect but not being able to take someone I trust at their word hurts. My father is an alcoholic so perhaps I'm more sensitive to this issue than others, but I just don't know what to do. Has anyone here ever been able to actually help someone with a serious issue? I've known her for over five years, I don't want to leave her but I feel like I just can't make a difference. It feels exactly like dealing with my dad, who no matter how much we begged and pleaded, would never make the changes that would be best for those he loved. I'm worried.
A good first step might be for you to stop drinking around her. If you keep putting her in a position to fail, don't be surprised when she does.
I don't think you should drink around her at all. If she's showing a commitment to quit, it's necessary that you don't drink around her. I think you know what you're getting into.
You, and the poster below you are absolutely right. It starts with me. She's impressionable and by doing that I'm basically giving her permission. I'm just being childish and immature, hoping that there is a solution to help someone without having to make any sacrifices of my own. A fool's gamble...
This or stop drinking full stop. I've been on the wagon since Halloween for several reasons. It doesn't calm me down like it used to, health reasons AND because a friend of mine. I can drink as much as she can and it seems not to affect us but I know it does, so I stopped. I don't think she will follow my lead but we both have the same type of hangups, addictions and other problems and I hope she can see that it isn't easy for me as well. You really can't make anyone do anything they don't want to do themselves. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't doing this because of her, but I can't tell her what to do without feeling like a hypocrite either. I hope it works out for you.
Sounds like you need to vent. I would take it to two levels. #1 get her so drunk so doesnt want to drink again. #2 Remind her of that night.
You drinking only encourages her to drink as well. Either cut that stuff out of your life (and hers) or prepare to accept the consequences.
